Boy, am I bored. Good morning, Garfield. It's another day just like any other day. Isn't it great? Some people confuse boredom with security.
1 December 1980
I need a change. Maybe I'll take up a hobby. Maybe I'll learn a new language. Maybe I'll participate in a sport. Maybe I'll stay bored. It takes less effort.
2 December 1980
flick flick You know you're bored when flicking a lint ball becomes all-consuming.
3 December 1980
Every day it's the same boring food, same boring people, same boring routine... rrrr ROWR! FFFT! ...same boring fights.
4 December 1980
Do you know where I'm residing? Bored City, that's where. But not for long. With a positive mental attitude I can whip it. I think I'll make a lateral move to self-pity.
5 December 1980
I'm bored. ARRRGH That helped.
6 December 1980
CHOMP! GULP GOBBLE PLICK! ODIE!
7 December 1980
Somehow, I prefer Garfield in his less affectionate moods.
8 December 1980
Garfield, I've been thinking... I'm seriously considering having you declawed. Whatever for?
9 December 1980
Why would Jon want to have me declawed? A cat without claws is like a bee without a stinger... A porcupine without quills, a shark without teeth, a snake without fangs! I think I see his point.
10 December 1980
Granted, declawing a cat may spare the furniture. But it also renders a cat defenseless. Put yourself in my shoes...how would you like to go through life... Knowing somewhere out there is a dog with your name on it.
11 December 1980
Some friends of mine and I would like to discuss this declawing idea of yours. Thanks, friends.
12 December 1980
Garfield, I'm sorry I tried to have you declawed. Let's forgive and forget, okay? BUZZ I'll settle for "forgive".
13 December 1980
OH BOY! CHICKEN! I LOVE CHICKEN! Hold it, Garfield. I don't know how to break this to you. I know it's going to break your heart... But, I'm never letting you have chicken again. You might choke on the bones. OH BOY! HAMBURGERS! ILOVE HAMBURGERS! What? No
14 December 1980
I think it's time you met a lady cat, Garfield. And if you're not sure what to do on a date just watch me in action sometime. I have. Make an inuendo, get slapped. Make a suggestion, get slapped. Make a move, get slapped.
15 December 1980
Jon says this after shave is supposed to attract women. gallop gallop gallop gallop Darn...wrong species.
16 December 1980
It's time I met a cat of the female persuasion. What took you so long?
17 December 1980
What do they call you? My name's Arlene. And what do they call that space between your front teeth? This relationship is off to a tenuous start.
18 December 1980
Wanna eat mice? Wanna beat up dogs? How barbaric. how nauseating.
19 December 1980
Tell me, Arlene, what good is that space between your teeth? *** When will I see you again? Next time I want to hail a taxi.
20 December 1980
Cats can be broken to the leash if you just hang in there. -
21 December 1980
Garfield, would you happen to know what happened to the lasagna I fixed for dinner? * I didn't know you could whistle. I'd tap-dance too if it would change the subject.
22 December 1980
Did I ever tell you I'm 29, Garfield? You would have been 30 but you were sick a year. I would have been 30 but I was sick a year. MY KINGDOM FOR A NEW PUNCH LINE!
23 December 1980
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Why, Garfield Arbuckle...The spirit of Christmas is giving, not receiving. I'll give you this if you don't give me that. Now GIMME! That's the spirit.
24 December 1980
I love Christmas. The parties and the presents... The caroling, the presents. The food, the presents, the decorations, the presents, the fun and the presents. Merry Christmas!
25 December 1980
OH NO! I overslept! I'M LATE! For my nap.
26 December 1980
Oh no! They've raised my electricity bill again! What'll I doo? There's only one thing to do in a case like this... SLEEP ON IT! A real man of action. zzzz
27 December 1980
No sweat, sarge. I'll take that machine gun nest out with my trusty bazooka here. So this is what it feels like to be potato salad. Rhett, rhett. Whatever shall I do? Wherever shall I go? Take me to your leader, earthling, or I'llatomize your face. That
28 December 1980
GARFIELD! I'M Home. Gotcha again.
29 December 1980
This year I resolve to be nicer to Odie. KONG! Now that that's out of the way, I can enjoy new year's eve.
30 December 1980
Here you are, Madelyn, my dear. There's a cat hair in my punch! GARFIELD!
31 December 1980