GARFIELD'S HISTORY OF DOGS The world's first dog crawled out of the sea about ten million years ago. But, unfortunately for him... He was immediately nabbed by the world's first dogcatcher.
1 September 1980
GARFIELD'S HISTORY OF DOGS Tail wagging was invented by a dog named "Bonzo Wag". He found that tail wagging endeared him to humans. Bonzo also invented slobbering, but that didn't go over so well.
2 September 1980
GARFIELD'S HISTORY OF DOGS During the stone age, dogs were used for hunting much as they are today. bark bark GRRRR Times were tough then. STOMP!
3 September 1980
GARFIELD'S HISTORY OF DOGS Contrary to popular belief... The first dogs were HAPPY to meet the first cat. For, until then, all they had to chase up trees were rocks. Arf
4 September 1980
GARFIELD'S HISTORY OF DOGS The first fire hydrant.
5 September 1980
Dogs' historic roles as hunters, protectors, trackers, laborers and companions have culminated to make modern dog what he is today. It could just make you cry.
6 September 1980
Do you feel personally responsible for the world food shortage? Every time you go to the beach, does the tide come in? Have you ever eaten an entire moose? Can you see your neck? Do joggers take laps around you for exercise? If so,welcome the NATIONAL FAT
7 September 1980
Welcome to National Fat Week. This is the week all of you, my fat brothers and sisters, celebrate your big, round, beautiful bodies. Remember, you're not overweight, everyone else is undernourished.
8 September 1980
This is National Fat Week. Arise, fat people! LET US AVERT OUR NATION'S INSENSITIVITY TOWARD FAT PEOPLE! LET US MAKE FUN OF BALD PEOPLE!
9 September 1980
Here's a National Fat Week handy fact... 60% of the people in our nation are involved in some way with the food industry. That's right. Eating is not only fun, it's patriotic!
10 September 1980
This year, let's celebrate National Fat Week by stamping out fat jokes. Let's face it, fatties... We should be able to stamp out anything we wish.
11 September 1980
We fat people are constantly being discriminated against. Airplane and theater seats are too small. Designer clothing is not made in our size. But that's trivial. What this world really needs is a king-size sandbox.
12 September 1980
Here's a National Fat Week diet joke: What would you get if you cross a dieter with a nine-foot gorilla? You get a gorilla who diets anywhere he pleases.
13 September 1980
* OH, GARFIELD * Go fetch the paper. You gotta be kidding. No paper, no breakfast. That's blackmail. Good boy! -
14 September 1980
Hungry, Garfield? Bingo.
15 September 1980
Uh-oh, here comes Jon! -
16 September 1980
I fell nasty today. PUNT! You gotta work it out.
17 September 1980
I know it's chilly this morning, Garfield. But you're not supposed to sit there. So what's a bun warmer for?
18 September 1980
Would you like to go out, Garfield? POW! Or would you rather stay in?
19 September 1980
You look guilty about something, Garfield. Did you eat my pie? Your pepper steak.
20 September 1980
arf arf rrrrr Let's see. I think I'm supposed to raise the fur on my back, recoil in horror and flee i terror. Or is it: recoil in horror, raise the fur on my back and flee in terror... Or is it: flee in terror, recoil in horror andraise the fur on my bac
21 September 1980
GARFIELD Will you get out of my flower box and come to lunch? No thanks. I just ate it.
22 September 1980
I won't say you're fat, Garfield... But I will say you're two of the finest cats I've ever had. Let's see...hairdressers, hearing aids, hit men.
23 September 1980
SPLOT! Let me guess. You're trying to tell me you don't like your meal. In my own subtle way.
24 September 1980
We cats are very unique. Who else has our pride, style and sophistication? Who else can kill an afternoon hanging on the screen door?
25 September 1980
26 September 1980
gobble! gobble! gobble! Thanks for leaving a wing, Garfield. What are friends for?
27 September 1980
This chair could use some softening up. boing boing boing scratch scratch scratch Much better. SPROING Just when a chair earns your respect, it turns on you.
28 September 1980
How about dinner tonight, doc? Sure. If there's nothing good on Television. Did you hear that, Garfield? She practically threw herself at me! Pray for reruns, hotshot.
29 September 1980
Just once I'd like to go on a date without Garfield. Where to, sir?
30 September 1980