Do you know why I hate Nermal? - It's not because he's so young , tiny and cute... - He reminds me I'm so old, fat and ugly.
1 September 1981
- I can't reach that pie, Nermal. What say we team up? -
2 September 1981
Maybe I could be as popular as Nermal if I learned to dance. - - I think I hurt something.
3 September 1981
MINE! - - Yours.
4 September 1981
Sorry you have to leave so soon, Nermal. But, I wasn't... - - I'm not afraid of him wearing out his welcome. I don't want him to break in a new one.
5 September 1981
I'll have a steak, fries and a large Cola. - And my cat here will have an order or lasagna. - WHAP! - Make that a double order. - BONK! - Perhaps a triple order. - GOOSH! - Heck with it. Give him the whole pan. And give it wings.
6 September 1981
- SWIPE! - I hate mondays.
7 September 1981
Hee hee - HA HA HA! - When you're built low to the ground, a walk in the grass can be ticklish.
8 September 1981
Hello, tree. Hello, flowers. - Hello, apteryx. -
9 September 1981
There you have it, folks. - Medical science has a cure for almost everything but the common cold... - And the early morning stares.
10 September 1981
Surprise, Garfield! I got you a scratching post. Gee, thanks. - - scratch scratch scratch
11 September 1981
YAWN - ARRRGH! - Why are you wearing my reading glasses? All the better to scane you with, my dear.
12 September 1981
- - rats! - I went and did it again. - Here I am, doomed to die again. If I stay up here I'll starve. If I jump I'll become a cat pancake. I hope someone rescues me. - Stuck up th tree again, Garfield? Help! Help!
13 September 1981
Rats, I'd like to sleep in this morning, but I'm hungry too. - * - Z
14 September 1981
Go fetch the paper, Odie. - -
15 September 1981
Ha ha ha! What a great plot, fine acting, super photography. - I love commercials.
16 September 1981
- - You're no longer a kitten, Garfield.
17 September 1981
If cats can run up trees, why can't cats run DOWN trees as well? - - Garfield, you are very, very stupid.
18 September 1981
Owning a pet is ideal for single people. We have companionship without the hassle of raising a family. - - Wipe your feet before coming into the house! Okay, dad.
19 September 1981
- Shoo, mice. Get out of my vitamin pills. - Mice get into everything. - Somebody could chase them out of here. - I wonder why they wanted the vitamins? - It beats me.
20 September 1981
Guess what, Garfield? We are going back to the farm. - It will be nice to get back in touch with mother nature. - When you find her, give her my best.
21 September 1981
It will be nice seeing mon and dad on the farm. - Maybe we can help with the chores, Garfield. No way. - I'd get dizzy rotating the crops.
22 September 1981
I'm bored...bored, bored bored. Things could be worse I guess. - SPLOOT - Bingo.
23 September 1981
It's just my luck to fall into a hog waller. - Nothing is less appealing than a muddy cat. - Hello there, good lookin'. Oh shut up.
24 September 1981
How can you hogs stand to lie in a waller all day? - The mud keeps the flies off and keeps us cool. - And if we ever get out, the mud dries instantly.
25 September 1981
It's time to go home, Garfield. Let me knock that mud off you. - CRACK! - Thanks...I think.
26 September 1981
ROWR! - Aw, wadda matter? Did Puppy tat hurt his paw? Let me give it a kiss. - KISS - There we go. All better. - - Pooey! Where's the disinfectant?
27 September 1981
I'm bored...bored, bored, bored. I hat Monday. I hate routine. - - RUMBA RUMBA SNORT RIP It's going to be one of those weeks.
28 September 1981
Where is it written I have to act like a cat?! - Why can't I act like a moose instead? - Stop being silly, Garfield. - Careful, fella. I've gored people for less than that.
29 September 1981
Hello, I'm a bluebird. - Garfield, you're too big to be acting this way. But I'm small for a sperm whale. - I'm thinking of getting you some professional psychiatric help. You mean there are AMATEUR psychiatrists?
30 September 1981