1978 1979 1980 1981 1982 1983 1984 1985 1986 1987 1988 1989 1990 1991 1992 1993 1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017
 
 


 
   
Garfield

I HAVE IT! I'll make a million dollars. Sympathy cards for dieters.

1 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

2 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Rise'n'shine, old buddy. Z There's a bright new day out there, with new challenges. Have some food. Have some water. YEA, GARFIELD! GET OUT THERE AND LIVE LIFE FOR ALL IT'S WORTH! CHARGE, BOY! There's nothing tougher thankick-starting a cat.

3 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

boing boing Ha ha, aren't you cute! Here, have some food. I hate myself when I do that.

4 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Did I ever tell you about my weird uncle Roy? He had a species change operation. He had himself changed to a dog. It was tragic. He chased himself to death.

5 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here's how to handle a fierce animal. Show no fear. And show no pain.

6 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

If I'm quiet enough I should be able to prepare this lasagna all for myself. Hark! Isn't that the sound of a lasagna noodle being laid on a bed of ricotta cheese? Uncanny. Come on, come on. Bake that dude.

7 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I think I'll do some caterwauling tonight. CRASH! HOLD IT! WAIT TILL I'M ON THE FENCE, YOU TWIT!

8 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

For my first selection, I'd like to... CHUKUNG! Obviously, sir, you are not a patron of the arts!

9 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello there, Nermal. Garfield! Where's Nermal? You didn't stuff him in that breadbox did you? Thank heavens! What kind of an animal does Jon think I am? Urf Shut up, Odie.

10 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield! What happened! Quick! Get the license number of that dog!

11 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Any sudden moves toward my food bowl can get you into a heap of trouble, boy.

12 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What the... Ribbit.

13 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Choose your weapon, Odie. We shall now duel with newspapers. At one pace! WHAP!

14 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Near miss. Near miss. Direct hit.

15 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Odie, you have your polled up newspaper. I have mine. Let's have at it! WHAP! Weekend edition.

16 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! SPLAT! I really envy you, Odie. POW Imagine...the first house pet on the moon.

17 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Good morning... ...Garfield. Caffeine makes me nervous.

18 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie! Dogs can't climb trees! It's amazing what one can accomplish when one doesn't know what one can't do.

19 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

How are you boys going to get out of the tree? I don't know how I'm getting out of the tree. As for Odie...

20 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield, how are you going to get out of that tree! Boing! Boing! Why, by using my head...and Jon's, and Odie's.

21 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Look, Garfield, a robin's nest. You can tell it by the eggs. That's nothing. Look over here. A cow's nest.

22 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh-oh. I got a nibble! Darn, jerked too hard again.

23 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here I am in the land of large breakfasts. This giant pancake sure tastes good. What a nice dream. Where's my blanket?

24 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Grandma, this is my cat, Garfield. Well it'll be! Heavens to Betsy! Land o' Goshen! I remember back when all we had were wood-burning cats. What won't they think of next?! Bizzare.

25 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You know, Garfield, to make it through this old life, you have to be a little crazy. You said it, grandma. Why, just look at me. I talk to cats.

26 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello, Garfield. Out of the way, dog! I think I love you.

27 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

My Hubby passed away 31 years ago, Garfield. I don't know what I would have done without my cats. I've wiled away many a lonely hour rocking and stroking my cats. I envy those cats.

28 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You're looking a little stiff, Garfield. What you need is a lemon tea rub and a glass of hot horse liniment. Or is that a liniment rub and a glass of hot lemon tea?

29 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Grandma's leaving now, Garfield. So long, grandma. So long, Garfield. You liked her didn't you, Garfield? Back when they made her, things were built to last.

30 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

rrrr GARFIELD! LUNCH TIME! GARFIELD! WHERE ARE YOU? SCREEE It is time for you to eat, majesty. If I must.

31 January 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

KABOOM I hate mondays.

1 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

2 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Snack attack! Maybe just a sandwich. One ham on rye coming up.

3 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

A banana has two uses. Food... and entertainment.

4 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Look at that beautiful rainbow, Garfield. Just think. At the end of each rainbow is a pot of gold. There's nothing like a healthy respect for mother nature laced with a little greed.

5 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I like you, Odie. In the catnip again, Garfield?

6 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Pooky, with your help we should get Jon's steak dinner tonight. Don't worry, old buddy. I'll sew you back up when we're done. tap tap Let me get this straight...you say your cat's teddy bear ate your dinner? Biggest appetite for ateddy bear I've ever seen

7 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Eat that or else, Garfield. I think I'll... else.

8 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

9 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Be careful! We'll all be killed! I haven't started the car yet, Garfield. That's it! Let me out.

10 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I didn't want my sundae to melt while I was eating it.

11 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

CLICK! SHOOP! Faster than the speed of dark.

12 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

My ivory-stemmed, mother-of-pearl inlaind meerschaum! My blow toy.

13 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You know you're a very lucky cat, Garfield. You have just about everything a cat could want. You have your sanctum sanctorum. My hidey-hole. You have your teddy bear. My confidant. You have your dog. My scratching post. And you haveme, your loving compani

14 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

We must do something about your breath, Garfield. It's not my fault you left the garlic cheese out last night.

15 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

16 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I don't believe I ate that whole bag of cat food. I'd better jog some of this tummy off. -

17 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I really don't like myself when I'm this fat. swipe! I can't even enjoy the simple pleasures in life.

18 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Sit up, Garfield. Sit up. Sad.

19 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oboy! My feet can touch the floor again! Garfield, Garfield, Garfield.

20 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What a dysmal day. I hate rain. I hate spiders. SPIDERS?! I hate spiders more than I hate rain.

21 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate mondays.

22 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just staying in shape in case I ever get that hungry.

23 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What time is it, Garfield? What am I doing? A can't tell time.

24 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Dear Garfield, My dog chases my cat all over the home. How can I make them get along? There's only one sure way to improve their relationship. Shoot the dog.

25 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Garfield. One bite. -

26 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Cough cough. GASP! Okay, no more dry cat food.

27 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Phobias are funny things. I am absolutely fearless except where spiders are concerned. Hello, snake. How are you? Isn't that strange? Spiders scare me, but snakes don't scare me. NOW snakes scare me.

28 February 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Dinner is ready, Garfield. I moved the table over here.

1 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

CRUNCH crunch crunch crunch That frozen pizza would be much better if you baked it first.

2 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here, Odie. I got you a rubber bone.

3 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

4 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

smack! slurp! You have the manners of a pig, Garfield. Slow down and spit out the seeds. rata tata tata tata

5 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

6 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What do you think, Garfield? Don't ask. There's nothing like camping out in cold weather. That's for sure. As the temperature drops, the circulation gets going. And the feet get numb. This is nature at her best! I'd settle for less. Wehave everything...ou

7 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What a dismal day. I think I'll stay in bed all day. Good morning, Garfield. It's a beautiful day today. What a beautiful day. I think I'll stay in bed all day.

8 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield, you know the dog next door? What a loser. A real jerk. I hate him. He moved away yesterday. A prince of a dog. I'll miss him, The neighborhood won't be the same without him.

9 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

AHCHOO! sniff Gesundheit.

10 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

And now a word from our sponsor. ZOOM Welcome back.

11 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Odie, you push the cake off and I'll catch it. DON'T TIP IT! DON'T TIP IT! You tipped it.

12 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

PUNT Have you kicked your dog today?

13 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield, my pictures just came in. Whoopty-doo. I love pictures. Paper memories of plastic people. What's this? You've been playing with my camera again, haven't you, Garfield? Who me? The Leonardo da Vinci of theshutterbug set?

14 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

15 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z Z Mmmph fmoph fweef That is correct. It is time to get up.

16 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

MAD DOG! MAD DOG! Stay out of my whipped cream, Odie.

17 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield has the unique ability to hear a can opener from anywhere in the house. Wha... -

18 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here's a new cat food. See what you think, Garfield. sniff What are you doing? With all this horse meat, there has to be a pony here somewhere.

19 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie's asleep and nobody's watching. Z pat pat I keep my affection in the closet. Z

20 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Last one in's a rotten egg! You first, Pooky. Back flip! -

21 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ROWR BOOT And now for the main attraction.

22 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Testing, one, two. Testing, one, two. ROWR Can you hear me there in the back? Good.

23 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love show business. Gimme the full moon. Gimme the fence. KAWHOCK! Gimme the broken teeth. Gimme the multiple lacerations.

24 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

'cause momma was a great old gallll *MROOW* Thank you for that large round of indifference.

25 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's the difference between a dog and an eggplant? About three IQ points. BAP! BOP! BOOP!

26 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

tappity tappity tappity Okay...who waxed the fench?

27 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

CHOMP! SLURP! GULP! Z Stay out of my dreams.

28 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

peep peep peep peep peep peep It looks like there will be a bumper crop of cat food this year.

29 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I wish Odie would finish what he starts.

30 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Bone breath!

31 March 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Too much rope.

1 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't you dare walk across the table with those muddy feet. -

2 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

* * I must have a blown fuse.

3 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm gonna have some fun with this boomerang. Fetch the stick, Odie. The dumb cluck will never catch that boomerang. GAWANGA! -

4 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It looks as though I'm on another diet.

5 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

RRRRRR ROWR! Not good.

6 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

When I diet, I get mean. When I diet, I also get weak.

7 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, no! Pooky's broken a stitch! WAHHHH! When I diet, I get emotional.

8 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Uh-oh -

9 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

When I'm off this diet, I'm going to eat lasagna, cake, ice cream, mashed potatoes... I just gained two pounds!

10 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

sproing FOOM! boink BEEP! BEEP! BZT Just as I thought. All the warranties expired yesterday.

11 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Arlene, gimme a kiss. KISS It's time I reevaluated my previously hard-line stand against declawing cats.

12 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What say we go find something to eat? Is that all you think about-food? Of course not, love... This business of sleeping holds a great deal of fascination for me. A real renaissance man.

13 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Food, food, food, is that all you think about, Garfield? That's about it. So what am I, chopped liver? Don't flatter yourself. He certainly knows how to make a girl feel good.

14 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you know what I like about women? They are so soft. Come to think of it...

15 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

PURRR PURRR Sorry about that, Arlene.

16 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Garfield. I caught the mouse and ate it. You can open your eyes now.

17 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Well, well, what have we here? You're lucky this fence is between us, dog. Come on, put 'em up. Take that! BOP! Hey, chicken, come back here and fight like a man. You had to paint the gate today. SMACK!

18 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's go for a walk, Garfield. It's going to be a beautiful day for a stroll. Jon should have been a meteorologist.

19 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I think Odie's getting a idea. * Odie's not too bright.

20 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm so clever. Some bird is really going to be surprised. As well as some cat. sniff sniff

21 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's that? There must be a leak in the roof. If it isn't a leak in the roof, I don't want to know what it is.

22 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Would you like a steak, Odie? -You didn't say, "may I?"

23 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Odie, how about a free trip to Loose Tooth City? WHIRRRR! I gotta cut back on my follow-through.

24 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z Z Don't worry, Odie, old buddy. I'll get you down. Ork Ork PTU! POW! Close enough.

25 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love television. Where else can you see significant world events? Where else can you see the great opera and ballet? Where else can you see Lorenzo the Woodchuck race a steam locomotive over Ricky the Rat?

26 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Why all this flap about television? They say families don't visit anymore... Why, that's what commercials are for.

27 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I consider television a worthwhile pursuit. Why, watching daytime television is even better than...uh...better...than... I hate talking myself into corners.

28 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Welcome to the Rocky Oxnard SHOW .... .... .... .. . I always turn the volume knob the wrong way.

29 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I gotta fix that vertical hold.

30 April 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

We'll be right back after this word from our sponsor. "Sasquatch" Welcome back.

1 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I just got comfortable, Garfield. Do you ABSOLUTELY have to be let out? Oh, yes. Very well, then. Sucker.

2 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Guess where we're going, Garfield? To a hayseed convention? Yesiree, we're gonna see mom and dad on the farm. We're gonna slop the pigs and pluck the chickens, boy howdy. We're gonna have us a time. That is, if your father doesn't beatthe heck out of you

3 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Mom! Son! Son? Mom?

4 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

How have you been, mom? Never mind that. Here, eat, eat, eat. You're my kind of woman.

5 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Then, once the potato is dug up, it is sliced, deep-fried, salted and bagged. voila, you have your potato chip. I hate knowing where food comes from... All the magic is gone.

6 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hurry up with that hay, son. Supper's waitin' Son? Long time, no farm, huh, Jon?

7 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

We had fun visiting the farm, didn't we, Garfield? Speak for yourself, Jon. It's great getting back to basics, putting your hands in old mother earth. But I'll never get these fingernails clean. A real man of the land.

8 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

screeee crunch! yabba! yabba! yabba! sock! Human beings...why do they yell at each other? Why do they hurt each other? URF! What do YOU know? WOING!

9 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is a Monday? plip Monday is a day designed to add depression to an otherwise happy week.

10 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is life? Life is a lot like a hot bath. It feels good while you're in it. But the longer you stay...the more wrinkled you get.

11 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is television? Television not only gives the eyeballs something to do. But it's a socially acceptable excuse to snack.

12 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is a goldfish? A goldfish is an aquatic expression of beauty and grace that provides its observers with many hours of blissful meditation. It also makes a darn fine breakfast.

13 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is a dog? Let me put it this way... If a dog were a faucet, it would leak.

14 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is a cat? A cat is a furry animal, complete with dog nibblers and furniture shredders. HACK! The hairballs in the throat are also standard equipment.

15 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SPLAT! SPLOOSH Why is it cats chase butterflies? Is it instinct, or is it just stupidity? Probably stupidity.

16 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

YAWN What happened to you? I got up on the wrong side of the bed.

17 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

CHUG! You're a real bear until you've had your first cup of coffee, aren't you? And then I'm the sweetest so-and-so around.

18 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's go for a walk, Garfield. I'm not going for a walk. You're going for a walk. I'm not going for a walk. YOU'RE GOING FOR A WALK IF I HAVE TO CARRY YOU! I can't argue with that logic.

19 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You really should think about jogging, Garfield. It's 50% mental, you know. It is? GREAT! Jog, jog, jog, jog, jog, jog, pant, pant, sweat. I'll work on the other 50% some other time.

20 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'll cut the lasagna in two pieces, and you take first pick. It's getting cold, Garfield.

21 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

They don't make trees like they used to.

22 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

* (click) EEEEEEEE! (click) You know, pleasure motors. (click) (click) Hi yuh, kids! PIC A STATION AND STAY WITH IT, GARFIELD. click!

23 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

blut blut blut blut blut When are you going to learn to control that temper of yours, Garfield? The exact same instant they invent an easy pouring catsup.

24 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Any cat can use a bottle opener. But it takes a real man to use his teeth. A real STUPID man.

25 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What are you planting, Garfield? Birdseed?

26 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ODIE! CUT THAT OUT! OWOOO AROOO EROOW

27 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What this dog needs is a poomp. POOMP

28 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ROW!! EROOOO Good morning, Garfield. I'm sorry. Did I wake you?

29 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SNAP BLAT! Is it windy out, Garfield? Not so you'd notice.

30 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

31 May 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

1 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

2 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

lap lap lap lap lap -

3 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Ah ah ah WAH-CHOO! sniff

4 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Ah ha ah WAH-CHOO! -

5 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love you, bunny rabbit. I love you too, deer. I love you all . What the...? I brought some friends home for dinner.

6 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's see, what should I do this week? BARK! Bingo.

7 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here I am just swaying in the breeze like so much laundry put out to dry. Suspended from a tree limb like an orange ripening in the sun. Poetic, yes, but I doubt if it's material for an action-packed mystery thriller.

8 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Boy, my arms are getting tired. -

9 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Good! Here comes help! Hang in there, baby. Ha ha. I can see the headlines: "Cat kills jocular passer-by".

10 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I can't believe I've been hanging in this tree all week. Now I can.

11 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Getting out of this tree will be simpler than I thought. -

12 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello. Haven't we met somewhere before? Perhaps a pasta place in Palermo? What's that? Oh no, my dear. Even though you are just a lasagna, I admire you for this mind. You know I can't resist you when you wear garlic sauce on yournoodles. This could be the

13 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Wow. I'm going to be four years old this saturday. It's time to reflect upon my accomplishments. It's time to reminisce about good times... It's time to lie about my age.

14 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Face it, Garfield, you're not getting any younger. I wish there were something I could do about the aging process. I'd do sit-ups, but I couldn't stand the noise.

15 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Yawn. You know you're getting older when your favorite late night show is the six o'clock news.

16 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

17 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It hardly seems possible I'm celebrating my fourth birthday tomorrow. BARK! SPLAT! Time flies when you're having fun.

18 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GARFIELD! GULP! Maybe you should have blown the candles out first.

19 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

YAWN Did you ever have a time when you wish your pets could speak?

20 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello. I'm Nermal, the world's cutest kitten, here to do cute kitten things in order to charm the pants off your owner and point out how uncute you are. I hate Monday.

21 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Gimme that. I fail to see what's so cute about yarn. Or kittens for that matter.

22 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Gee, since Nermal isn't here, I'll eat his food, too. -

23 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Nermal, go ahead and jump. I'll have you out of there in two shakes of a cat's tail. Or is that two shakes of a lamb's tail?

24 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Come on, Nermal. Let's fight. ROWR! What a revolting development this is.

25 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's have some fun, Nermal. I'll tie you in nice and safe. See yuh.

26 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SPLUT Don't you dare laugh. I hate it when someone has a laugh at my expense. SPLAT If I laugh, Garfield will kill me. If I don't laugh, I'll burst. WAH HA HA HA! Ha ha ha, whee.

27 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's time you go on another diet, Garfield.

28 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is a diet? A diet is too little of a good thing. A diet is making a molehill out of a mountain. A diet is the subject of a lot of stupid platitudes.

29 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate diets. I'd get out of bed to have breakfast. But it's not worth the trip.

30 June 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm strong. I can handle this diet. sniff Then why do I feel like I've just lost my best friend?

1 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

That apple is all you're getting for dinner, Garfield. -

2 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Gimme food. Lots of it. And right now. Yes, sir. Two adjectives never used to describe a cat are: "wishy" and "washy".

3 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm bored...bored, bored, bored. There must be more to life than this. I'm going to find some excitement. YUK! You're out of your territory, aren't you, fella? Hello there, stray cat. Where have you been? Cultivating a healthydislike for excitement.

4 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

In our fast-paced world, relaxation is practically a lost art. Z Practically.

5 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here you go, Garfield. Table scraps! SPLAT! That's dog food.

6 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Aren't you cute. ROWR! Why, you vicious brute! What happened to "cute"?

7 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

This is a Garfield push-up. Z One.

8 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't look in here, Jon. It's not a pretty sight.

9 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I wish Jon would get married. FWEEE The only way he knows my dinner is ready, is when it sets off the smoke alarm.

10 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Touch my food and you're one dead dog.

11 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

My fear of mondays is really childish. I must learn to face them like a man. You first, Pooky.

12 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's that you say, little fella? Oh, very well. I'll hold you. Pooky needs me.

13 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GOBBLE! SMACK! SLURP! GARFIELD! Uh-oh. Stay right where you are or the teddy bear gets it.

14 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You lead a very special life, Pooky. You don't have to fight within dogs. You don't have to sleep. You don't have to eat. I feel sorry for you.

15 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I know, I know.

16 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

17 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

* * Did you whistle at my girl? No, sir. I didn't. ROWR! It was my cat! It was my cat! Well, I hope you're happy. *

18 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's been a long time since I heard a good "splut" PUNT SPLUT

19 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! splut BARK! splut

20 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, I wouldn't say you're fat... But Herman Melville wants to write a book about you. SPLUT

21 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Uh-oh! Too hard! Why haven't those eggs come down? Maybe they stuck to the ceiling. Maybe I should look. SPLUT

22 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

splut splut blat blat blat SPLUT

23 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

No one knows the trepidation I feel knowing somewhere out there is a "splut" with my name on it. Oop! SPLUT

24 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Surprise, Garfield! There are prizes at the bottom of the cat food. BANZAI! munch munch munch munch tweet tweet tweet tweet

25 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Just what is prowling? Let me show you. This is walking. This is prowling.

26 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Nobody knows just why cats love to prowl at night. BONK! And neither do I.

27 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Say there, little lady, what are you doing out on a night like this? Going for a stroll. You'd better sty by old Garfield's side. The night is fraught with peril. -

28 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Nighttime is magic to cats. Cats are very comfortable with darkness. KLUNK KLUNK Especially if their darn flashlights don't work.

29 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ARRRGH! You're supposed to be on my side!

30 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What should I do this weekend? CLICK! I think I'll just sit around and blink a lot.

31 July 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

YAWN I hate to eat alone.

1 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate Monday...something bad always happens to me on Monday. It's just a matter of time now... The suspense is killing me. DO IT TO ME NOW, MONDAY! GET IT OVER WITH!

2 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Life is like a poker game. If you don't win... You lose.

3 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

YAWN twang twang Have you ever awakened with a whisker you just couldn't do anything with?

4 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK I hate dogs.

5 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's dinner time, Garfield. GARFIEEELD BONG! BONG! BONG! You rang?

6 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I wonder what this machine is. click whirrrr ZIP SPLAT It's obviously some sort of cat torture device.

7 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

The time is right. This looks like the perfect spot for a clandestine rendezvous. Here comes my double agent now. Eeeawwkey, 43, and the letter c an infant in your lap may dampen your spirits. Uh-oh! It's counter intelligence! -Down in front, Garfield. QU

8 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hmmm. A hollow stump with a thing in it...I gotta find out what it is. rrrr RRRRRRR Tuesday.

9 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Even though "curiosity killed the cat" is just a silly superstition, I must know what's in this stump. rrrr ROAR! rip! chomp SNORT! Ha ha ha, silly me.

10 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm going to give that thing in the stump a taste of this rock. Munch, munch, ptooey! I didn't know stones had bones. burp

11 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

All right, whatever you are, come out of there! rrrr You? A mouse was making all that noise? This stump has really great acoustics.

12 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I can't believe you were the thing in the stump that's been scaring me all week. Why, I'm gonna... Down, Guido, down.

13 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I've learned my lesson. I'm not messing with things in hollow stumps again. rrrr I'm going home where it's safe. rrrr rrr Oh, no.

14 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's show time! Some day I'm gonna be the greatest caterwauler in the world. They're gonna call me "Cats Wauler". ROWR! CHUKONG! AROOO WHOCK! Why do you do it, Garfield? Dues. I'm just paying my dues.

15 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

crunch crunch crunch I know you're hungry, Garfield. crunch crunch But what say I boil that spaghetti first? It is a tad firm.

16 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'll see you later, Garfield. I'm going to the supermarket. Let's see...I have my shopping list, my keys... Don't forget your shopping bag.

17 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Supermarkets are like a giant United Nations of Food. You have coffee from Brazil, cheese from France, beef from Australia... And lasagna from heaven.

18 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

One frozen lasagna. Two frozen pizzas. One frozen pasta freak.

19 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Whew! Last trip. GULP! SNORT! RIP! MUNCH DARN YOU, GARFIELD! Now I have to go back to the store. Not on my account, really.

20 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, boy, do I love food. If I couldn't eat food, I'd just die. Sage, Garfield, sage.

21 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Holy moley! Here, boy, sniff. CHOMP RRRRRRR Dogs, you can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em.

22 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm hungry...nah, I'm too tired to be hungry...nah, I'm too depressed to be tired. Yup. It's Monday.

23 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Rats...I can't shake this deep blue funk I'm in. No doubt about it... This week is gonna be one long Monday.

24 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh boy am I depressed. I'm fat, I'm lazy, nobody likes me... Good morning, ol' buddy. It's another beautiful day. Quiet. I'm on a roll.

25 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Nobody likes me. What's the matter with you, Garfield? I SAID NOBODY LIKES ME! WHOCK! BONK! Nobody likes me, and nobody listens anymore.

26 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm starting to lose my depression. I gotta do something. Much better.

27 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love you, Garfield. Leave me alone. I want to be depressed. Tickle! Tickle! Tickle! Hee hee Feel better, Garfield? I'll get you for this, Jon.

28 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It seems like I've been lost in this jungle for days with nothing to eat. I'd eat berries, but there's no sugar and cream. Where's a four-star french restaurant when you need one? FOOD! Dr. Livingston, I presume.

29 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Look out, world! Here comes the caped avenger! Oh, sure, super-hero crime fighters make for an old, overused story line... But have you ever heard of a fat, weak one?

30 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

The caped avenger steps into the seamy underworld and reasserts his noble code. "I will seek out evil wherever it may lurk and destroy it". Unless, of course, there is the slightest possibility of harm to my person.

31 August 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

1 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

dribble dribble dribble The caped avenger must pummel this evil dog. dribble dribble dribble The caped avenger displays a rare show of compassion.

2 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

The caped avenger spots some evil that must be severely dealt with. WHAM! BIFF! BAM! The caped avenger would be a more effective crime fighter if he didn't have to use one hand to hold his cape up.

3 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

This cape is the source of my power, the source of my identity. The source of my security.

4 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

* * Oh my, what a beautiful baby! Normally I don't like babies... But this one is special. I'm such a sentimental slob.

5 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

This week I'm going to change my ways. I'm going to begin by no longer hating mondays. I'm crazy about mondays. I just love mondays. Now I'm only fond of mondays.

6 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I resolve to stop being fat, lazy and cynical. I shall now rise at an early hour. Z

7 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

As long as I'm improving myself this week, I might as well try to get along with Odie. Come here, Odie. Give me a big hug. Yuk.

8 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I shall now use sheer willpower to resist eating that hamburger. Unnngh WAH! I'm beginning to worry about Garfield.

9 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

This self-improvement bit is beginning to bug me. I feel like a goody-two-shoes. Maybe my old personality wasn't all that bad... The gluttony, laziness and cynism lent a little texture.

10 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm sick of this self-improvement kick. I'M FAT, I'M LAZY AND I'M CYNICAL! I admire that in a cat.

11 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

WHAP! chuking Catch, Garfield. BONK! Ever have a day when your timing was all off?

12 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

OH, NO! I am DEFINITELY not getting out of bed today. Not on Monday the 13th.

13 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

14 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Yuk! Although cats are finicky eaters... "Hunger strike" isn't exactly in our vocabulary.

15 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

fwip I don't understand you, Garfield. Where's your sense of adventure?

16 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Gimme that hamburger. You get a lot more accomplished if you do it with authority.

17 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

18 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

rrrrr rrrrr roof meyow RAWF! FFFT! BARK! ROWR! MROWR BARK You win.

19 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

20 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

splat! A very short but neat rain shower.

21 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

22 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Pardon me, which is the way to Cincinnati? Thanks. I see by the ol' writing on the wall it's time to check myself into the funny farm.

23 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

-

24 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Look at all those tiny ants going to the tiny beach to do some swimming. Uh-oh. A tiny minnow is cruising in to eat the swimmers. Uh-oh. The minnow just got harpooned by an ant who bears a striking resemblance to Robert Shaw.

25 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! I don't like the sound of this. Surprise, Garfield! What have we here? We now have two houses. A big one and this little one. A regular Taj Mahal. One of us is going to live in the big house, and one ofus is going to live in

26 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

OH NO! IT'S NOT THERE! I'm not getting out of bed without it! Not without my morning cup of coffee!

27 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Good morning, Jon. Well, helloooo there. Come to papa. That's me, Jon Arbuckle, second fiddle to a coffee bean.

28 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, you'll never find happiness at the bottom of a coffee cup. I beg to differ. Look, there's some right there in the corner. By golly, you're right.

29 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Take it easy on that coffee, Garfield. It might be too much for your tiny system. Pardon me, boy, is that the chattanooga choo-choo Bingo.

30 September 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love you, coffee; you make me glow. You make me smile. I love you so. My nerves don't like you, but what do they know?

1 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Now for a strong cup of coffee. Now for a good night's sleep. Now for a brisk bout with insomnia.

2 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's that rumbling? The ground is shaking! Oh, no! It's THEM! THERE'S NO WAY OUT! I'M TRAPPED LIKE A RAT! ARRRGH! -

3 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ARRGH! Very funny, Odie. Now get your face off the window.

4 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ROWR

5 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I got you a new friend, Garfield. He even talks. Oh, goody. Will you play with me? Why, of course, little buddy. Let's go play with Jon's power tools.

6 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I wonder what that bag of sawdust has to say. Feed me. Feed me. Feed me. Feed me. Feed me. He does have a certain charm.

7 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Imagine, the nerve of Jon giving me a dummy as companion. What kind of an intellectual dwarf does he think I am? Practice of the Aristotelean mean would have a significant positive effect on the world institutional environment. Oh, shutup.

8 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Your little friend here is certainly cute, Garfield. stomp! stomp! stomp! Little friend or not, there's something to be said for the diplomatic removal of competition.

9 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's this? Here's an interesting article about the ancient practice of cannibalism. Lovely. Can you imagine what life was like then? Traveling salesmen were called "meals on wheels". Having the boss over for dinner had an entirelydifferent mea

10 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Maybe I wouldn't hate mondays so much if I didn't have this calendar here to remind me. -

11 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

That hamburger is mine, Garfield. It's mine. Let's see if you want it after I stomp it, lick it and shed on it. You win, Garfield. You can have it. I don't think I want it now.

12 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

POP! POP! POP! POP! POP! POP! POP! Let me guess. You're going tree climbing, right? How did you know?

13 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Now to get out of this tree. Don't you dare! sniff sniff

14 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I wish you understood my every word, Garfield. I could tell you I love you. I understand how you feel. I love me, too.

15 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love it when you cuddle up to me, Garfield. What a warm and wonderful gesture. My nose was wet.

16 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SMACK! HEY! tickle tickle tickle STOP IT, GARFIELD! YOU PLAY TOO ROUGH! I'm sorry I yelled at you, Garfield. Cats have feelings too, you know.

17 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm not leaving bed, I'm not moving a muscle. If I don't bother Monday, maybe Monday won't bother me. Hello, I'm Nermal, the world's cutest kitten, here to visit for the week. Well, maybe I will do just a teensy bit of sobbing.

18 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

The mirror is one of cat's best friends, Nermal. You can primp in it, play with it and admire yourself in it. I don't see what's so great about it.

19 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Follow me, Nermal. This is how you climb a tree. Now what do we do? What a silly question. We sit here until the fire department comes.

20 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

lick LICK What happened to you?

21 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

How cute. Thank you, Nermal. Uh...thanks. You'd better appreciate it, sucker. Your flower garden gave its life for this bouquet.

22 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Tell me, Garfield, are you threatened by the fact that I am much younger and cuter than you are? I'm bigger than that. You can say that again! See how they like your rapier wit on the moon.

23 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello. I wonder what kind of hat this is? What time's that there bus leaving for Topeka? See you, mum. Billy Bob and me are gonna play in traffic. Gee, I'd love to go to the cotillion but I gotta stay home and watch armwrestling onTV. That's it. This must

24 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Get ready to go, Garfield. We are going to visit dad and mom on the farm. Send my regrets. I really must stay home and pluck my nose hairs. I guess I'm ready to go.

25 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SPUT SPUT WEEEZE GURGLE SPUT The car has stopped and it's getting dark. What should I do, Garfield? I con only think of one thing. MAKE IT GO

26 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

We're stranded, Garfield. We'll have to find somewhere to spend the night. What about that place? Cute. A little paint, a few curtains, and it would be a regular love nest.

27 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I guess we'll have to stay in this abandoned house tonight, Garfield. Garfield R.I.P. 6-19-78 10-30-82 I can't put my finger on it, but I have an uneasy feeling about this place.

28 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

This house is spooky, isn't it, Garfield? Kind of reminds me of the vet's office. Uh-oh, footsteps! Quick! Into the closet! CLOMP CLOMP What do you suppose it is? CLOMP CLOMP Let's hope it's the welcome wagon.

29 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

CLOMP CLOMP It's coming to get us, Garfield. It knows we're in the closet! -ARRGH! DAD! You didn't show, so I came looking for you. One life down, eight to go.

30 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

* If I disguise myself as a bird, I should be able to get close enough for an easy lunch Glue gluk gluk gluk swim fins waddle waddle -

31 October 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's nice to be back in the country with space to roam. Space to breathe. Space to be me. Space to be BORED!

1 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I think I'll have an egg for breakfast. crack! Mommy! Maybe chicken for lunch.

2 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Mommy! Look, kid, I'm not your mommy. I'm a boy. Boys can't be mommies. Daddy!

3 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

What's that, daddy? It's lasagna. And don't call me daddy. Here. Have a piece. Yuk! NO SON OF MINE WOULD REFUSE LASAGNA!

4 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Stop hanging around me, kid. Just remember, you're a tender young chicken and I'm a very hungry cat. I guess I have that little giblet the what for. EYOW!

5 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

For the last time, kid, I'm not your daddy. You're a chicken and I'm a cat. Now go back to your mother. Goodbye, daddy. -

6 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's job, Garfield. I'll sit this one out, thank you. pppppp RRRRRRRRR BARK! BARK! BARK! SHOOP! ROWF! FFT! ARRRRRRRRGH! BARK MROW! Pack your bags, Reba. The neighborhood's gone strange.

7 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats move at a speed proportionate to the amount of food at their destination. They may even exceed the speed of sound. Meow.

8 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats are independent. Cats are loners... They are underfoot only when you're carrying groceries. Sorry about that.

9 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats instinctively know the precise moment their owners will awake... Then they awaken them ten minutes sooner.

10 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats are naturally attracted to only one type of human being... The type who is allergic to cats. WAHCHOO!

11 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats can't hear commands... Garfield! Get off the bed! Cats can't understand cajoling... See? Even Tommy the Clown likes his new cat food. But they do sense when you want to take them to the vet. Let's go for a ride,Garfield.

12 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD'S LAW: Cats shed in direct proportion to their contrast with a person's suit. -

13 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

How about a shot of flea powder, Garfield? If you can hit a moving target. SCREEEE I guess it's safe to eat. GOTCHA! I guess I pulled a good one on Garfield. Guess again, sucker.

14 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate mondays. And just why do I hate mondays? Because mondays hate me.

15 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

There's one thing I hate worse than grapefruit. And that is hating grapefruit.

16 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate mornings. I hate the fuzzy feeling. I hate the cold floors. I hate the bad breath.

17 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate cute. I also hate people who try to ingratiate themselves.

18 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

chuking KONK! I hate toasters. chuking KRONK

19 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hate hating things. Check that. I love hating dogs. PUNT!

20 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Here we are at the veterinary clinic, Garfield. I prefer to think of it as the chamber of horrors. I wish doctors wouldn't leave their instruments sitting out. Just as I thought, it's icy cold. I wonder what she intends to snip off withthis? I don't even

21 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, gee. I can't get into my bed with these muddy feet. Z

22 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I love to sleep. I sleep to restore my energy. I sleep to refresh my wits. I sleep to escape.

23 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z Garfield! What happened? I had a nap attack at full throttle.

24 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

If I were to come back to this earth, I'd like to come back as a pillow. I could lie in bed all day. And people would put their heads in my lap and go to sleep.

25 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

UH-OH! HERE COMES THAT MEAN DOG! Nobody would ever harm a sleeping cat? Wrongo.

26 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z Z Z Z My feet fell asleep.

27 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z Z dum dee dum dee dum Yah tah tah tah, yah tah tah tah TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP Garfield, I was sound asleep. You're breaking my heart, now feed me. Anything else, sire? Yes, wash my blanket, change my kitty litter and retread myscratching post. I wonder if

28 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

SNAP! SQUEAK! What's that? Oh, no! Since I'm not a mouser, Jon set a mousetrap. Now it's killed a mouse! If you did your job, I wouldn't be in this fix.

29 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm sorry you got caught in that mousetrap, mouse. Oh, that's okay. I have a wife and eight kids. What doest that have to do with anything? This is the first peace and quiet I've had in years.

30 November 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Have a piece of cheese, mouse. Maybe that will make you feel better. How am I supposed to swallow? Good point.

1 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You're free to go, mouse. Thanks. Just where have you been? I suppose you and your fat friend have been having fun while I've been working and slaving taking care of our children. You'd better get yourself home right now. SNAP!

2 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Now get out of here. SNAP! SQUEAK!

3 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon will be checking this trap soon. My bunny slippers? They like to roam at night.

4 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

ALL RIGHT! I love flowers! I love to tiptoe through tulips. Dive through daisies. Romp through roses. You cat broke 'em, you bought 'em, buddy. Put some pansies on the tab, too.

5 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't knock those flowers of the windowsill, Garfield. I put them there to give them some sun. And some fresh air.

6 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Windows are great. They offer a front row seat to life's passing parade. THUD! They are also good for a yuk or two.

7 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I see you're bringing the mail in with your usual care. This letter says, "do not fold, spindle or mutilate." It didn't say anything about "maul".

8 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

MY NEWSPAPER! YOU CHEWED UP MY NEWSPAPER! It's things like this that make me wonder if you should bring in the paper at all. Precisely. poo

9 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

On chilly mornings, this is my favorite place in the whole house. Over the heat vent.

10 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, did you eat fern? WHY IS IT I GET BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING AROUND HERE? IF SOMETHING GOES WRONG, YOU JUST LAY It ON OL' GARFIELD! I have no idea what you're talking about.

11 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You can have this hamburger if you can reach it, Garfield. WHA!? b-b-b-b-b-b-b Jon will rue the day I got these rubber arms.

12 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

BOOM BOOM BOOM boom boom boom It's time you went on another diet, Garfield.

13 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

On this diet, Garfield, you may drink all the coffee you please. gulp gulp gulp This is some kind of weird diet. slosh slosh slosh slosh

14 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I think I'll step off my diet just long enough to eat a couple dozen cookies. Lettuce? That cat has no sense of humor.

15 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You know you're on a diet when even the dog food commercials look good.

16 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

You may go off your diet as soon as you loose some weight, Garfield. Why didn't you say so sooner? BUZZ Let's eat.

17 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Heck with it. I'm going off my diet. Show me a dieter, and I'll show you a person who belittles himself.

18 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Good morning, Garfield. I'm so happy you can share this glorious morning with me. Michelangelo would give up painting in a minute if he saw the canvas mother nature has rendered just for us today. Chirp chirp Just listen to the symphonyof sound from natu

19 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Good morning, Garfield. Is there something you're trying to tell me? It's the Christmas season, you say.

20 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme. GIMME! GIMME! GIMME! GIMME! GIMME! GIMME! I'm getting into the Christmas spirit.

21 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

That's gotta be a world's record! The presents go there. Move it, move it, move it.

22 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

I hope this gift is mine. rattle rattle rattle CRACK! tinkle tinkle tinkle I hope it's Odie's.

23 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

It's only noon, Garfield. Are you going to bed already? The sooner you go to bed, the sooner it's Christmas morning. Good night, little fella.

24 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Comics readers are very special people. You mean more to me than there is space here to express. I love you all. Have a happy holiday. I'll be funny again tomorrow, trust me.

25 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Set the stage, light the lights. Good evening, ladies and germs. SPLAT My car is so old, it is insured against fire, theft and India raids. BLUT My girlfriend is so cross-eyed, she can sit on the front porch and count the chickens inthe backyard. CRASH Ta

26 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Well, I wonder what's going to happen to me today. BLAT! Monday moves in a mysterious way.

27 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Go fetch the paper, Garfield. Look closely, Jon. These are cat's paws, not slave's paws. I'll ignore your small indiscretion this time, and share your life. Thank you...sir.

28 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

nibble nibble nibble It's not to chew your nails, Garfield. Oh, that's okay. I'm chewing on Odie's.

29 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

Z I'm bored. I need to add some sparkle to my life. Z

30 December 1982
 
 
   
Garfield

THERE'S A SPIDER! I HATE SPIDERS! Ha ha. I'll just flick him away. WHANG! Jon? Are you okay? ...Jon?

31 December 1982
 




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