- I'm taking this steak and there's nothing you can do about it, Chipmunk Cheeks. - I've always encouraged Garfield to be assertive. But I believe he's crossed the fine line to obnoxious.
1 November 1983
BONK! BONK! - BONK! BONK! - Odie's going to have to learn to walk one of these ways.
2 November 1983
I wonder what pets do when they don't know their owners are watching. - Let's find out. - I don't believe it. Neither do I. Odie just drew to an inside straight.
3 November 1983
CLANG! - Hey, Garfield, how do you like my new dinner bell? - It got my attention.
4 November 1983
- Oh no! My legs are turning to jelly! My mind is turning to mush! Could it be a laser? ...a death ray? No! It's... - My sunbeam.
5 November 1983
This looks like a good place to sit and muse. - What is the thing called life, Odie? - Montaigne said, "The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in how we make use of them." - Holmes said, "Life is painting a picture, not doing a
6 November 1983
Hey, Garfield, we're going to visit aunt Gussie. - I know she's old and mean, but underneath she has a heart of gold. - I hear she used to double-date with Lizzie Borden.
7 November 1983
Hi, aunt Gussie. Well if this isn't my daydreaming nephew, Jon, and his cat Blubberbutt. - Look, rodent breath, if you come within ten feet of my canary, I'll make a doily out of your hide. - I like her.
8 November 1983
Why, aunt Gussie! I didn't know you were homecoming queen in 1922. You bet. - Back then I had beauty, style, grace, charm... - And a body that wouldn't quit!
9 November 1983
How are you getting along financially these days, aunt Gussie? - Oh, I have my social security, I make quilts and sell my African violets... - And I knock down three hun a week teaching slam dancing at Denny's Pogo Pit.
10 November 1983
What would you like for Christmas, aunt Gussie? Oh...nothing much. - Maybe something for my bed like a little lacey throw pillow. - Stuffed with John Travolta's chest hair.
11 November 1983
It was nice visiting with you, aunt Gussie. Same here, Jon. - And you'd better forget about your crush on John Travolta. He's young enough to be your grandson. - DON'T TELL THAT TO MY COMPUTER DATING SERVICE!
12 November 1983
click! - Well, look who's in the television set. - Garfield is such a clown. - Ha-ha-ha. - WAH HA HA - Wait a minute! - Something just occurred to me.
13 November 1983
Look at all those people. All going to work to process food, produce electricity, manufacture kitty litter and so on. - All just for me. - I'd thank them individually, but they know who they are.
14 November 1983
Odie - WHOCK! SPLAT - That's for not being a cat.
15 November 1983
I guess I shouldn't have clobbered Odie for not being a cat. - If everyone had a choice, we'd all be cats. So I can't blame him for not being a cat. - This is for being a dog! punt!
16 November 1983
whirrr - glup plop - How's your cat food, Garfield? I could say more for the presentation.
17 November 1983
Oh, look, it's one of those things you pull on for service. - YANK! - Bring me a danish and a cup of coffee.
18 November 1983
- Stop playing with your food, Garfield. - I'm not. It dried out while my face was in it.
19 November 1983
This looks like a good place for a little nap-nap. - - - click WHIRRR - GASP! - SPLAT! - Hello, mom? The washing machine just spit out my jockey shorts. That's one thing I'd never admit to my mother.
20 November 1983
Here you go, Garfield. Take a big bite. - OH NO! - Just kidding.
21 November 1983
- SLAM! Yo, Garfield! What'cha doing? - Casting a critical eye on a career as a doorstep.
22 November 1983
Sitting atop this door, I see all and know all. - Now where's that fat cat of mine? - Don't take my name in vain. SMACK!
23 November 1983
Perching high on a door gives vent to a cat's philosophical bent. - Observing life from an omniscient point of view allows one to witness fascinating human rituals. - Like Jon cleaning his ear. squeak squeak
24 November 1983
I wish I knew how to get off this door. - Sometimes it would be nice to have all the decisions made for you. - SLAM! and sometimes not.
25 November 1983
PLOP - Where did you come from, Garfield? - Rumor has it the stork brought me.
26 November 1983
- - - - - - They didn't call me the shimmy king for nothing.
27 November 1983
I hate mondays. I can't shake this awful feeling that something dreadful is going to happen to me. - I'm saved! It's nice to see a friendly face. - You're going to the vet, Garfield. ARRRGH!
28 November 1983
You don't look happy, Garfield. - Happy about going to the clinic? Put yourself in my shoes. - You get to flirt with the lady vet while I get the business end of her thermometer.
29 November 1983
Did you know I'm a medical curiosity, doc? I'm not surprised. - I'm missing a major organ. Your brain? - My heart, you've stolen it away. I hate to see a doctor cry.
30 November 1983