knock knock Who's there? Uhhh...candy gram? You can't fool me, mystery meat. You want out to wreak havoc. Today the refrigerator, tomorrow the world!
1 March 1985
I wonder if I should clean the refrigerator. The bacon is gazing on the lettuce and he asks if the refrigerator needs cleaning.
2 March 1985
OH NO! GARFIELD! YOU'RE SITTING IN MY SCRAMBLED EGGS! They're warm. Okay, okay, here...enjoy. NO, go ahead and sit in them, they're ruined now. RUINED? JUST BECAUSE I STAY IN 'EM, IT'S NOT LIKE YOUR STUPID SCRAMBLED EGGS ARE DISEASED,YOU KNOW! UNNNGH! EAT
3 March 1985
It's time for your checkup, Garfield. I'll get checked-up while the lady vet gets checked out. We gotta make sure you're in good condition. Right. The only condition he's worried about is his glandular condition.
4 March 1985
Good morning, Mr. Arbuckle. How did you know it was me? I wasn't even in the door yet! you have a distinctive cologne. Oh, you mean my ''Ode De Lumberjack"? Bingo.
5 March 1985
How about a date, doc? Oh, let's not and say we did. That's better than nothing, I guess. Can we say I kissed you good night? If we can say I slapped you.
6 March 1985
Let's be honest with one another, Liz. I'm a man. You're a woman. Get the picture? That's the door. Get the picture? You'll have to draw it for him, doc.
7 March 1985
Do you think these shaders make me more mysterious? YOU don't need them. Hey, good-lookin', what time do you get off work? You just propositioned my coat rack. He might get lucky this time.
8 March 1985
In case you're thinking about asking me out, doc, forget it. I have plans. I'm seeing this girl, ho is real cute and real clever and we laugh a lot. Do tell... My, my, my! Do I detect a note of jealousy in your voice? I walked into thatone?
9 March 1985
Sigh. Garfield, you are worthless. Do you know that? You are doing zero with your life...zip. Do you know that? poke poke You should learn something new each day. It would lend purpose to this dreary existence of yours. I'm going tothe store. When I come
10 March 1985
Ah ah ahhhh! Don't touch that dial. We'll be right back. -
11 March 1985
Our cat food is new and improved! New and improved! New and improved! Just think...all this time I've been eating old and inferior.
12 March 1985
Rats! Where's the Binky The Clown Show?! click click click This remote control must be malfunctioning. click click click NOW it works.
13 March 1985
NO NO! DON'T CHANGE THE CHANNEL! WE NEED THE RATINGS! PLEEEEEASE! CLICK! Arrrgh! Choice is a powerful thing.
14 March 1985
CLICK Whatever Jon paid for this TV remote control, it was worth it!
15 March 1985
These game shows are disgusting. It's pathetic how some people will humiliate themselves to win money. Jon does it for free. *
16 March 1985
That's a pretty impressive display of shedding there, Odie. But there isn't a dog born who can outshed a cat. Take that! I WON! I WON!
17 March 1985
SURF'S UP! SURF'S UP! Garfield the Surfer King hangs three. You're acting strangely lately, Garfield. You live in your world, I'll live in mine.
18 March 1985
Garfield, the vet says you are going to have to stay inside. There's a rare strain of Hawaiian cat flu going around. Too late, doc.
19 March 1985
Garfield, the vet says the Hawaiian cat flu will give you a voracious appetite and make you listless and cranky. I guess we'll never know if you're sick or not! I saw that one coming.
20 March 1985
Garfield, you have the Hawaiian cat flu. You're going to have to lie around all week. Oh, darn. And you must stay inside. WHAT?! For the first time in my life, I gotta get out!
21 March 1985
Garfield, I know you are suffering from the Hawaiian cat flu, but you look ridiculous doing that hula dance. Watch my hands carefully, Jon. Every movement has a meaning! BONK!
22 March 1985
You look much better this morning. You must be over the Hawaiian cat flu. I doubt that I ever had it. What would you like for breakfast? Just some juice and a Danish. And a roast pig! And six pineapples! And a pound of Macadamia nuts!
23 March 1985
Hey, hey. Smile big, boys. I'm going to take your picture. Move back a little farther. Just a little farther. SHOOP! Uh-oh. There appears to be a camera shoved up your nose. Nas wha I min nrying noo nell you!
24 March 1985
Mondays, I hate mondays. It seems like I just get done with one and along comes another one! Did you know you're cute when you're angry?
25 March 1985
All right! A new world record! Six chins.
26 March 1985
HOLY GOOD GRAVY! I DIDN'T KNOW I HAD A BELLYBUTTON! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
27 March 1985
Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all? CRACK! tinkle tinkle Shards shards on the floor...
28 March 1985
SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH tap tap tap It's okay, Jon...I've subdued the chair. It's safe to sit in now.
29 March 1985
There's only one drawback to an assertive lifestyle. CRASH! Sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you.
30 March 1985
Here, Garfield. Eat! CLOMP! Just look at you! You're a fright! I get up early and groom myself because this is our special time together! And the only place you take me is for granted! Are you trying to tell me something,Garfield? I'm just showing you wh
31 March 1985