I gotta start getting more out of life. I gotta smell the roses along the way. Hey, Garfield, is there anything I can do for you? Bring me a rose.
1 February 1986
In the news, today, cat season opens tomorrow! Z Snort, what's that sound? OH NO! I LEFt THE TELEVISION ON! On the all night movie channel! CLICK! CLUNK! I feel like such an unworthy parent! Z
2 February 1986
Hi, this is Jon Arbuckle. My cat needs a checkup...what kind of cat is he? Uh, he's a registered yellow tabby with distinguished lineage. Actually, he's an orange meatball with stripes.
3 February 1986
Hey, Garfield, let's get a pizza! SLAM! OH, NO! HA HA! On the way we'll stop at the vet. IT'S THE OLD BAIT-AND-SWITCH!
4 February 1986
I hate going to the vet. Actually, seeing the vet isn't so bad. It's the waiting room that depresses me.
5 February 1986
The doctor's not looking. Now's my chance to make an escape! Stupid stainless steel table!
6 February 1986
Hey, doc, do you mind if I have something to drink? Help yourself. There should be something in the refrigerator by the specimen bottles.
7 February 1986
While you're at it, doc, how about giving ME a checkup? Say "Ahh". Ahh. What was that? You'll neve rhave to worry about liver flukes again.
8 February 1986
Two coat hangers. Two coat hangers and an empty closet. There you go, kids. * IT'S TRUE.
9 February 1986
Hey, dog, you're ugly! Hey, dog, you're stupid! Hey, dog, you couldn't catch a '532 Packard! ROWF! YIP! YAP! YAP! BARK! You gotta flip the right switch!
10 February 1986
Some people love to linger over dinner. ZOOM! Garfield makes cameo appearances.
11 February 1986
Do you know what I love about cats the most? It's our dignity. Even royalty could learn from the dignified style with which we conduct our lives. Well, I see by the old clock on the floor, it's lunch time. Time to beg for table scraps.
12 February 1986
My cat isn't perfect. He lies around a lot. In fact, I encourage him to lie around a lot. Because every time he moves, he destroys something.
13 February 1986
scratch scratch scratch scratch CRUNCH! ARRRGH! IF YOU DESTROY ONE MORE THING AROUND THIS HOUSE, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! You're too late.
14 February 1986
Sharpening claws can be risky business. scratch scratch scratch SPROING! Sometimes the furniture is booby trapped.
15 February 1986
Cat's cradle? I doubt it. World's LArgest Ball Of Twine World's largest ball of twine, huh? I wonder what this is for. Uh-oh! Don't worry, Garfield! I'll protect you from that fierce piece of string! I hate him.
16 February 1986
Ah, here comes Arlene. Hello, Garfield. Unnnngh Yugstyx. You may dispense with the vanity. Whew! Thank you.
17 February 1986
What's a girl like you doing in a place like this? But this is a nice place. Like I said...what's a girl like you doing in a place like this?
18 February 1986
About that space between your front teeth, Arlene. Yes? When you smile, you look like a vending machine. Check that, a "cute" vending machine.
19 February 1986
Arlene, I'm sorry I picked on the space between your front teeth. Perhaps this little gift will make amends. What is it? A toothpick!
20 February 1986
* * * * * You dance like you have two left feet. I do. Oh, yeah.
21 February 1986
Why hasn't our relationship grown? Because you're a wise guy and I'm self-centered. But, Garfield, no man is an island. Or, in your case, a continent. My ego and I will get back on you.
22 February 1986
Z I wonder how Garfield would look in my gag glasses? Z And tie, and shorts, and tennies? Z Good morning, Garfield. snort...Morning. Hee hee What are you laughing at, pea-brain? Sometimes I wish I were awake when I'm asleep.
23 February 1986
I wonder what dog food tastes like? pant pant OH NO! MY EYES ARE DRYING OUT! MY TONGUE IS STARTING TO SWELL! I'M GETTING SHORT OF BREATH! PANT PANT PANT PANT PANT PANT
24 February 1986
I have more respect for food than that.
25 February 1986
Isn't rain wonderful, Garfield? When it stops, the earth is cleansed and the plants are refreshed. And I get to go out on the driveway and stomp on earthworms.
26 February 1986
Uh-oh! Jon should never leave his bunny slippers under the bed alone. -
27 February 1986
Odie, you were a bad boy for chewing on the sofa. TAP TAP TAP Is this a private party, or can anyone play?
28 February 1986