Who are you? We, sir are rats. We're all brothers. - BONK! - Oh, yeah, one of us is a sister.
1 April 1986
Howdy, stranger. Rip, Juanita and Bob are our names and spreading pestilence is our game. - Which one of you is Juanita? - The one with "Eau de Vermin" behind her ears.
2 April 1986
How did you rats get your names? I'm called Rip because I'm fast. Juanita was my grandmother's name. - How about you, Bob? That's the sound my head makes when it runs into a wall. - I take it Bob isn't very bright. He couldn't get through a
3 April 1986
Jon will kill me if he finds out I let rats into the house. I'll lure them out with the old "Pied Piper" ploy. - * - Okay, fat boy. Let's take it from the top.
4 April 1986
What do you guys want to do today? Let's spread pestilence! - Nah, let's lower somebody's property value. Or take a scenic sewer tour. - You're disgusting. It's a living. Or run up an old man's pant leg?
5 April 1986
Hello, Garfield. Hello, Arlene. - I see you're still fat. I see you stil have that space between your teeth. - At least I can close my mouth. I can go on a diet. - You're not likely to go on a diet. You're not likely to close your mouth. -
6 April 1986
I hate partly cloudy days. - When it's sunny, I'm happy, when it's cloudy, I'm das. - On a partly cloudy day I can use up a week's worth of moods.
7 April 1986
My, my. You're up early this morning. - I didn't ge tup early. - My leg cramp did!
8 April 1986
I hate it when I can't ge tmilk cartons open. Let me give you a hand. - HIYAH! THOCK! - Amazing things: claws.
9 April 1986
You stay out there, Garfield. I'll let you in when I'm good an ready. - SCREEEEEEEE - I'm ready. Good and.
10 April 1986
All tucked in for the night? Yup. - - MY LASAGNA! I was hoping you wouldn't notice.
11 April 1986
And now for the third tennis ball. - TAH-DAH! A NEW WORLD'S RECORD. You spit those out very instant! - Some people have no sense of history.
12 April 1986
- Whoa! This is what I call a window of opportunity! - No you don't, Odie! I saw it first! - IT'S MINE! ALL MINE! - Wait a minute, Odie. I have an idea! Why don't we COOPERATE to ge tthe pie? Then we will SHARE it! - Sometimes the old axioms
13 April 1986
Hey, Garfield, guess what? We are going to visit dad and mom on the farm again! - Jon, you must be psychic. - I was just lying here thinking it was time to restock the burrs in my fur.
14 April 1986
Hey, mom, pass the potatoes, please. Scalloped, whipped, fried, baked or boiled? - Mom, you always fix too much food. I know, honey, I know. Now, what would you like? - i can't decide. Just give me a piece of pie. Apple, peach, pumpkin,
15 April 1986
Farm life's great, isn't it, Garfield? - However, I will admit it's a little slow. - Nothing much to do but count the bricks in the old silo. 14,238
16 April 1986
Look, Garfield! A moo cow! - And a bow-bow! And a piggy-piggy! - Ha-ha, you guys! This must be the famous farm humor I've heard about.
17 April 1986
Kind of muddy today, isn't it, Garfield? It is. - It's too deep for a little feller like you. I know. - you oughta get up on Jon's shoulders. I am.
18 April 1986
It's cloudin' up. Yup. - Looks like rain. Yup. These are men of few words. - It's rainin'. Yup. And few brains.
19 April 1986
scritch scritch scrith - SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH - SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH BARK! BARK! Why don't you boys let yourselves out for a change? - WHA?! - - CRASH - It's time I give some serious consideration to adding a pet door.
20 April 1986
The newspaper should be here about now. - BONK! - Sometimes you get the paper, sometimes the paper gets you.
21 April 1986
My life is boring. - Have you heard the old saying, "all dressed up and no place to go"? - I'm naked and no place to go.
22 April 1986
I gotta do something to spice up my life. - I know! I'll take my afternoon nap in the morning and my morning nap in the afternoon. - Garfield, you mad, impetuous boy, you.
23 April 1986
Life is like a Ferrari, it goes too fast. - But that's okay. - Because you can't afford it anyway.
24 April 1986
I shall now meditate in order to enrich my life. - There is nothing like meditation to get in touch with on'e self. - Self...if you don't get out of this stupid position in about three seconds, you kneecaps are going to fall off!
25 April 1986
Life is like a birdbath. It's made of concrete, filled with water, and uh...birds like to splash in it. - Boy, that was dumb. Life isn't anything like a bird bath. tap tap - Life...is like a sock monkey...
26 April 1986
Behind every sunday is a monday. - - Jon had better wake up on time this morning. - If he oversleeps he's going to regret it. - I fact, I kind of hope he does oversleep. We'll have some fun. - blink blink blink - I'M AWAKE! I'M AWAKE! PARTY
27 April 1986
Hey, Odie, give me a push. - A big push! - Let's make that a MEDIUM big push.
28 April 1986
Get ready to go into orbit, Odie! - - Let me know when you get back!
29 April 1986
Look, Odie. No feet! - Look, Odie. Only one hand! - I hate showoffs.
30 April 1986