New mailman, Garfield. You might have trouble with this one. You mean the guy with "I hate cats" branded on his forehead?
1 October 1991
YEOOOOOOW!!! CRASH! UGH BAM!! CRUNCH OOF THUMP THUD! The mail's here.
2 October 1991
Jon's really enjoying his drive * ...entirely too much. One of us has to get carsick.
3 October 1991
I'm stuck on one channel! click click click click What could be worse? Welcome to the Lassie film festival. AARRRGHH!
4 October 1991
Let's face it... As we age, our bodies change. My eyeballs are growing hair! Or, in some cases, mutate.
5 October 1991
Sniff Ah Ah...AH... AH pook CHOO!
6 October 1991
Garfield, I need some female companionship Okay, Jon. You realize I'd only do this for you.
7 October 1991
Would you go out with me, doc? Mr. Arbuckle, I'm single, not desperate. Well, I'M more complex than that... I'm single AND desperate. You talk to him. I'm a cat, not a psychatrist.
8 October 1991
You know, doc, you could do a lot worse than go out with me. You're right there, Jon. I could grow facial hair, or misplace my elbows... Or, get a rat in my boot. ...FOR EXAMPLE!
9 October 1991
Doc, will you go out with me? Open wide and say "ahh". Ahh. No.
10 October 1991
You know, doc, there's a lot of things about me you don't know. I know you have four pens and three paper clips in your shirt pocket. How do you know that? I can see right through you, Arbuckle.
11 October 1991
So, doc, how about dinner with me? NO. Lunch? No. Brunch? No. How about sharing a sack of honey.roasted nuts from the machine in the hall?! Look, Arbuckle, what do I have to do to convince you that I don't want to go out with you?Anything short of a death
12 October 1991
I * My Food * I hate this part. So, doc, how's Garfield? Fine. And how's Odie? Fine. And how are you? Fine. Okay if i pay by check? Fine. How about a date? Fine. YEEESS!! YEEESS!! THAT'S CHEATING! If you can't attract 'em, trick'em.
13 October 1991
bzzzzzzzzz GARFIELD! ODIE! LOOK OUT! I'M SHAVING! bzzzzz CRASH! Good evening, my dear.
14 October 1991
Uh...Jon...your hair. My cat bumped my arm while I was shaving, okay? Don't you have a hat or something? Sure. How's that? The exits are probably covered.
15 October 1991
DON'T GEt OUT! DON'T GE tOUT YET! See? chivalry isn't dead yet. SLAM! RIP! Which is more than can be said for your jacket.
16 October 1991
Sniff-sniff...boy, these flaming croquettes sure smell goo YAAAHH! MY TIE'S ON FIRE!! Would you like another drink, my dear? No, Jon, if I'm in the mood for another Shirley Temple, I'll suck it out of your tie.
17 October 1991
I don't believe I just flushed one of my contact lenses down the toilet! Somehow I do. And th eonly glasses I brought are my sunglasses. That's okay, Jon. They'll make you look continental. Kinda like a french dweeb.
18 October 1991
I am afraid I must ask you to leave, sir. What?! Did I offend someone or something? No, sir. Then what did I do? Sinc you've been here, you've slipped beneath the dress code. May I stay?
19 October 1991
Z rake rake rake rake rake rake rake WHEW! T O-DIE! ! SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE -
20 October 1991
21 October 1991
Odie, I think I saw something move in your dish! YES! YES! LOOK AT IT MOVE!
22 October 1991
FFFT GRRR Now, now! You boys be nice! FFFT GRRR
23 October 1991
Odie, do you have any idea how annoying your cheerfulness is? I was afraid of that.
24 October 1991
SLURP! SLUUURRP! -
25 October 1991
KICK! Can you believe it? I was playing nicely, and Odie just got up and left!
26 October 1991
GARFIELD The Cat Drapes Shredded Ferns Eaten Naps Taken No Appointment Necessary!!! munch munch ZOOM! ZOOM! You can't stop what you don't see. -
27 October 1991
A cup of coffee and a beautiful sunrise! What more could you possibly need? WHOP Oh, yeah.
28 October 1991
Sigh Life has passed ma by. Of course, I had to hide a few times.
29 October 1991
I won't be home for lunch. I'll be working as a towel boy at the birdbath. It's times like this I'm glad he can't talk.
30 October 1991
I think all the creatures of the earth should try to get along, don't you, Garfield? Absolutely. COUGH
31 October 1991