And here's tonight's editorial comment. Arf arf bow-wow bark - And now a rebuttal. - Meow meow purrrr meow That's telling him.
1 February 1994
Stay tuned for whatever it is we're showing next. - As if you had anything better to do anyway... - In light of your dreary, empty existence. Sounds good to me.
2 February 1994
Is your cat fat and lazy? - Does he do nothing but eat and sleep? - So what?! JON! YOU'RE MISSING A GOOD SHOW!
3 February 1994
The bank's security camera took this picture of the culprit. - - I thought it was a bakery!
4 February 1994
Stay tuned for "Watching Paint Dry". - Rats! - They preempted "Watching Grass Grow".
5 February 1994
Z - Hey! That's MY spot you're lying in, you stupid dog! Z - BOOT! - - - NUDGE NUDGE NUDGE NUDGE BURROW BURROW BURROW NUDGE -
6 February 1994
Nobody pushes you around, do they, Garfield? Nope. - - Not without a forklift, anyway! SLAP! Ack! I didn't see that one coming.
7 February 1994
"The Art Of Sophisticated Humor". - BOING SPLUT! - "By Binky the Clown".
8 February 1994
- That's enough of that. - Uh, I'm not there anymore, Odie.
9 February 1994
YAWN - GULP! - YAWN I haven't seen this face in two days.
10 February 1994
- - I was reading that. Nobody cares about your past, Jon.
11 February 1994
See, you roll the socks up like this. - Here, you try it. - You're not with me on this. Now, let's do the underwear.
12 February 1994
* Mee mee mee mee mee meeeee ** - ** ME-YOWR MEE YOWR MEE YOWR * - ** MEEEEeeyooWWRRRR! ** - GACK!! - THUD! - - Bet you didn't know I could do opera.
13 February 1994
BOUNCE BOUNCE - BOING BOING BOING - I had no idea you could do this on a hardwood floor! Diet time.
14 February 1994
I'm putting you on a diet, Garfield. - If you gain any more weight, earth will swing out of its orbit and plunge into the sun. - What do you say to that? Pass me adoughnut and turn up the air-conditioning.
15 February 1994
GET OFF! I CAN'T STAND IT! - ARRRRGH! - Just practicing. Shaddup.
16 February 1994
I know Jon said no more snacks. - But I had a weak moment. - Someone tore the door off the refrigerator! A weak yet intense moment.
17 February 1994
Life is a constant battle between right and wrong! - Good and evil! - Cheesecake and diet!
18 February 1994
- NO! NO! HAVE MERCY! - Out of the goodness of my heart, I didn't weigh myself today.
19 February 1994
Z tick tick tick tick - Z BRINNNG! - 'morning, Garfield. 'morning, Jon. - 'morning, Pooky. crunch crunch - 'morning, Odie. - - I gotta get off this diet.
20 February 1994
I've been dieting. Riiiiight. - No, really. Is this a face that would lie? - How should I know? I've never seen it.
21 February 1994
Dieting is hard work. - But, after several grueling days, I'm happy to report I have slowed my weight gain to a crawl! - A small victory perhaps, but a victory nevertheless. You have doughnuts on your breath.
22 February 1994
Hey, scale. How much do YOU weigh? - That's none of your business! - He can dish it out, but he sure can't take it.
23 February 1994
I'm glad you agree with my 'no snacks at night' rule, Garfield. - Garfield? - Are you standing over me with a fork? And about this far from deranged.
24 February 1994
Good news! - I'm happy to report that I have successfully gained five pounds! - First time I ever hit a weight goal!
25 February 1994
- Rats! - I just finished a 14-day diet, and all I lost was 2 weeks.
26 February 1994
- Hey? What's that ahead? FLEA COLLAR!!! - Everybody move to the rear of the cat! - My sidney is up there! I'll save him, ma'am. - Okay, son, hold on to my antenna. - SIDNEY! MOMMY! HOORAY!!! - TAIL COLLAR!!! There's a movie here somewhere.
27 February 1994
Odie - GARFIELD - All is right with the world.
28 February 1994