poke I had to provoke it.
1 August 1994
Here I am, trapped in a ball of yarn. My whole life just flashed before my eyes. And it looked like a junk food commercial.
2 August 1994
I'm reading about ancient civilizations. Know how they killed their enemies? Yeah, they gave them a ball of yarn to play with.
3 August 1994
Now I know why cats are given yarn. It's nature's way of keeping a balance. Like a dinosaur falling into a tar pit.
4 August 1994
5 August 1994
poke I'll get you for this.
6 August 1994
There's ordinary old coffee... SLUP YOING! FLAP! FLAP! FLAP! FLAP! WHIRRRRRRR And then there's "bottom-of-the-pot-sitting-plugged-in-all-day-coffee!"
7 August 1994
I spend the day doing good deeds. While YOU didn't move from that spot. We both made the world a little nicer today. Hey!
8 August 1994
I should exercise. Fudge? You're evil, you know that, don't you?
9 August 1994
BOOT! Hey, Jon. Did you see that line drive?
10 August 1994
Garfield left the table in the middle of a meal! Snack time.
11 August 1994
Out of dust rags, are we?
12 August 1994
As soon as I get my jacket, I'll be ready to go to the vet, Garfield. Fine. Be sure to say hello to me.
13 August 1994
14 August 1994
EIIIIYEEEE!!! I'm putting you on a diet, Garfield! YAAAAAAHHH!! No fair! UNNNGH (CHOKE) GAH! Who a re you going to believe? Me, or this stupid talking scale?!
15 August 1994
You know, there's "fat"... And then there's "fat-fat" So what am I? "Fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-fat-&
16 August 1994
All right! I lost a few pounds! And I found them. I wish that was just an old joke.
17 August 1994
You're as light as a feather! A really, really, REALLY big feather.
18 August 1994
Go ahead. Give me the truth. I can take it. Earth's orbit around the sun is slowly deteriorating. One day we'll fall to a fiery demise! Not that truth. Your sister has mange?
19 August 1994
Hack! Cough! The weight's too much! I'm a goner! Lean over, I want to see your face before I go... Or IS that your face?... This is called justifiable homicide.
20 August 1994
I wonder if Jon fixed the toaster? click KA-CHOINNG! PWING! PWANG! YAAAHHHH!! CRASH! PWING! PWANG! YIPE! CRAAASHH! Yup.
21 August 1994
I just might want to take a picture of something other than you, Garfield. Why?
22 August 1994
I think I'll try the direct approach. Hop in! Just a thought.
23 August 1994
I'm tired. I'm Garfield. You look like you're Jon, tired.
24 August 1994
I'm creating the illusion of movement. You need dusting. It's not working.
25 August 1994
CHOMP GOBBLE GOBBLE SNARF SNARF I need to get away from you. Burp. How come?
26 August 1994
Saturday night, and the moon is full. Out of the night, a cry to all that is wild and free... LET'S POLKA! I think I'll turn in early.
27 August 1994
dunk dunk wring wring -
28 August 1994
Beware of dog?! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ooooo. You must be very mean... Touch, too.
29 August 1994
Beware Of Bird Oh, really? PTOO CLANK! Yes...definitely really.
30 August 1994
I don't entirely enjoy your company. Pardon my bluntness. BEWARE OF THE WILLING-TO-SHARE-HIS-FEELINGS DOG.
31 August 1994