I know why you people don't get my jokes! You're not hip! You're too old! Why don't you all go home? Isn't it past your bedtime?! KONK!
1 June 1995
Maestro, if you please... ** Ahem...in my key, please. ** Thank you.
2 June 1995
You wouldn't hit a cat with glasses, would you? SPLAT! SPLUT SPLIT SPLOT SPLAT SPLOT SPLOT SPLUT! -
3 June 1995
Hey, guys! Look at the chicks! I have just the thing to impress them. In-line skates! Get ready to meet your destiny...let's GO!!! YAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahh I think it was the "destiny" line that should have tipped me off.
4 June 1995
Poor Jon, sitting there so peacefully. I really should stop harassing him. But first I have to get rid of this brick.
5 June 1995
6 June 1995
YAWN YAWN We do our own stunts.
7 June 1995
To keep Garfield from taking cookies, I have installed a surveillance camera. Hey! Where's my camera?! Stole it. Sold it. Bought more cookies.
8 June 1995
I'm a talking bird! And you are a fat. ugly cat! Who is no longer hungry.
9 June 1995
Coming up next... Advanced drape clawing techniques. Educational T.V.!
10 June 1995
Yawn. Yawn. Good night, Garfield. click Good night, Jon. click zzzZZSNOORE click SNOORRRRE click SNOOOORE HARK!-KAFF! KAFF! GASP! SNORT! SNORT! SNAAAARK! GAHHHHEEE!!! Oh. pipe down and gimme your pillow.
11 June 1995
OH, NO! My birthday is right around the corner!
12 June 1995
How does it feel to be turning 17, Garfield? Great! I'm learning something new every day! And forgetting two old things.
13 June 1995
I'm not aging, I'm maturing. Okay, so I'm aging.
14 June 1995
If you tell me how old you're going to be next week, I promise not to laugh. Seventeen. I would have preferred the laugh.
15 June 1995
There are lots of advantaged to growing older! There's, uh... -
16 June 1995
Well! How nice! A birthday card. Thanks. Sa' right.
17 June 1995
Who, me? AH CHOO! HA! POO! Thank goodness!
18 June 1995
WOOOOOSH Happy 17th. Practice! That was practice!
19 June 1995
Z Wow. Z He got out of bed today. Z
20 June 1995
It would be nice to see you two cooperating. I guess I asked for it.
21 June 1995
Do not damage the new couch! Okay! CRASH! BAM! SMASH! Destroyed everything BUT the couch, right? Everything.
22 June 1995
Beware Of The Dog And His Little Fiend Mr. Wolverine That does it.
23 June 1995
They put a proverb under each yearbook picture. Euphemia Hinkle: ! A penny saved is a penny earned". Jon Arbuckle: "A fool and his money are soon parted".
24 June 1995
sniffff ! * WHAP!
25 June 1995
Reserved I'm a regular here.
26 June 1995
I might as well relax till I get rescued from this tree. Cats always get rescued. Buuuuut, what do I know?
27 June 1995
Windy today. SCHWAP! "Gemini: today you will reach new heights".
28 June 1995
Here comes the fire department! I'm saved! SQIRRRRT
29 June 1995
Stuck up in a tree again. WHY do I stupid things like this?! And that.
30 June 1995