I am never, ever taking you through a car wash again. Can I have that i writing?
1 June 1997
Hmmm... "Scorpio: travel highlights your immediate future". WHACK
2 June 1997
Hi! I'm new around here. My name's Myron. Put 'er there! This is a good day.
3 June 1997
Hey! I thought I squished you yesterday! Nah. You only got my leg. Wanna sign my cast?
4 June 1997
What happened to you? The cat squished me flat. He hates spiders. You're not alone. He hates flies, too. Ouch.
5 June 1997
What do spiders do for fun? Well, me, I like to read. Knock yourself out.
6 June 1997
SPLUT Nothing worse than a clever arachnid. hee hee hee
7 June 1997
Spider! You'r elooking good! Yep... Just had the body cast removed yesterday! I also had the stitches removed last week, and I don't have to wear that nech braze anymore. The doc says I'm as good as new. The only thing that hasn'treturned yet is... SMACK
8 June 1997
Coffee, the perfect diet drink...it's low cal. SCHLURP And high octane!
9 June 1997
I bought some "gourmet coffee," Garfield. What do you think? PHHHT Okay, I'm gonna go out on a limb here...
10 June 1997
The coffee took my donut. Coffee strong enough for you? Yeah, but the donuts are too weak. Burp.
11 June 1997
snap snap Will that be all, master? For now, but stand by for crumb detail.
12 June 1997
I heard SOMEone is turning nineteen soon. Have you been blabbing again?
13 June 1997
You're getting older, you're getting... ...you're getting...uh...ummmm...uh... Now what was I thinking about?
14 June 1997
Z Gaaaaarrr-fiiieeelld... Come to me, Garfield. Commmmme to meeeee... Come toward the light, Garfield... Come to the liiiight... Get out of there!
15 June 1997
I feel old, Squeak. How old are you? I'm going to be nineteen. WHOA! ...I mean, oh, really!
16 June 1997
tap tap tap hee hee hee hee hee hee hee Just wait till YOUR next birthday!
17 June 1997
Okay, Garfield, I've done all th emath. With your daily average of 18 hours of sleep timeas your age, you've slept for 14 years and 3 months. The best years of my life!
18 June 1997
Wow... Is it warm in here, or is it just me? Happy birthday! It's just me.
19 June 1997
Big dinner date tonight, Garfield. I'm pulling out all the stops. Yessir, I'm using the drive-up window tonight! Well hello, Mr. Snooty.
20 June 1997
Harriet, if you ever leave, I'll pull myself out by the roots! GULP Did I say "roots"?
21 June 1997
mmmmm AHhhhhhh There's no better feeling than lying in cool grass on a warm summer night. Garfield, time for bed! Rats. Put it back-
22 June 1997
You didn't do anything remotely resembling work today, did you? Well, dinner was kind of cheway.
23 June 1997
He doesn't drink it. He just spreads it around the house.
24 June 1997
Z Z PA, THE CHICKENS ARE DROWNING! Z Recurring farm nightmare.
25 June 1997
Do you know what's fun? Me neither. A rare moment of candor.
26 June 1997
May I speak to the man of the house? Define "Man".
27 June 1997
Are you certain this is the right amount of chili powder to add to this dish? Absolutely! FOOF! Now pitch it out and order a pizza.
28 June 1997
Beware Of The Dog Seriously, This Dog Is Bad News! All Right! All Right! I Don't Have A Dog! I wanted A Dog, But Nooooo! "Too Stinky, Mother Said..." Well, I'LL SHOW MOTHER! I'LL SHOW YOU ALL!!! Beware Of The Man In The Dog Suit.
29 June 1997
Did you see that beautiful woman? She smiled at me! Was that before or after she pointed an laughed?
30 June 1997