STOMP weeeeeeeeeee weeeeeeeeeee -
1 March 1998
Z SLURRRP! Are you getting up this morning, Garfield? Wake me up when dogs are extinct.
2 March 1998
I'm going to commune with nature. Fine. I'll stay in and commune with the throw rug.
3 March 1998
Ha! Ha! Look at those floppy ears! Look at those droopy jowls! And look at that reach.
4 March 1998
Stop me if you've heard this one. An ostrich walks up to a farmhouse with a monkey under his wing... Heard it.
5 March 1998
Big date tonight, Garfield. RIP! RIP! It must be. He's using the "good" magazine cologne samples. pat pat
6 March 1998
Nobody understands me. You're a selfish pig. But, what do I know?
7 March 1998
RIIINNG * Hello, Jon? It's Lisa. What time are you picking me up tonight? BUURRP * ...got a date with an angel... Not anymore.
8 March 1998
You should learn to appreciate the beauty of the great outdoors. Good idea. Put the skylight there.
9 March 1998
I'll go out and work hard, while you just lie there and do nothing. I'm being sarcastic. But that doesn't mean it's not a good idea!
10 March 1998
I'm thinking about going off to seek adventure! Or maybe adventure can come here. I hope it calls first instead of just popping in.I owe Odie an apology. PUSH CRASH! Now I owe him two.
11 March 1998
I just thought of something for us to do. SMACK I just thought of something for me to do.
12 March 1998
Garfield, there's a mouse in the kitchen. Tell him to bring me a sandwich. Well? Garfield, you're fired! And hold the mayo.
13 March 1998
I ate so much I can't move. Which is the only reason I stopeed eating.
14 March 1998
15 March 1998
GARFIELD! What do you call this?! I call that "backscratcher avec cat hair".
16 March 1998
Do you want to go for a walk, Odie? Do you? Yip! Yip! Do you, huh?! Yip! Well, don't be gone long.
17 March 1998
I started without you.
18 March 1998
Guess your weight? Sure. You're fat. Now step on and we'll see if I'm right. Hm...two insults for the price of one.
19 March 1998
Here comes the ferocious cat! muss muss muss muss muss * DINGDONG His date is here and I hid his comb!
20 March 1998
I know Garfield! I'll stuff my mouth full of bananas... Then you tickle me! We are the bored.
21 March 1998
bzzzzzzz EEEEEEYAAAHHH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH SMACK WHOP SMASH KSSSHHH bzzzz EEEYAAAAHHHH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH SWISH KSS SMASH CRASH! CRUNCH Obsessive behavior is not a pretty thing.
22 March 1998
* DING DONG ? Why didn't I think of that sooner?
23 March 1998
pant pant pant zzzzzzzz
24 March 1998
I'll lure that fly closer by putting on this mask. Here, fly. SWAT Bad dog!
25 March 1998
So, you want a housefly bumped off? Let's talk... I work alone and my take is fifty percent. Do it quickly and you can have the whole fly. Hey, Guido likes what Guido hears!
26 March 1998
Whatever happened to that annoying fly? BURP Excuse me. Ask question, get answer.
27 March 1998
28 March 1998
Hi, cat! Hi, tree. How about a climb up the new, improved me? How so? It's spring! I have al new bark... Uh-huh. All new branches...all new leaves... Uh-huh...uh-huh. All new baby bird nests... And the same old lies. HEY!
29 March 1998
Here's something you never stop to think about... Do you realize that one-seventh of your life is spent on monday? Ptooey! Now the inside of my outh is all black! Newsprint will do that.
30 March 1998
31 March 1998