I made out my will, Garfield. Can I have the fridge? - I want to be cremated... - And have my ashes spread over my accordion. Oh, but we'll be creamting your accordion as well.
1 April 1999
Will Jon come up with something to do this weekend? - The crowd is on the edge of their seats... - POLKA! Single file...exit to the left.
2 April 1999
- - Your shoes are on your knees, Jon.
3 April 1999
- - - - - - Round table.
4 April 1999
Uh-oh. - I can feel it coming. It's gonna be a... - bad hair day.
5 April 1999
I sleep a lot. - Sometimes I don't know if I'm awake or dreaming. - And then sometimes I get a little hint.
6 April 1999
You know, there are times when I honestly feel you don't respect me. - HUHHH - Take now for an instance.
7 April 1999
Look, Garfield! A chest hair! Are you sure? - Only REAL men have chest hair...virile, rugged men... I feel thet's just a piece of lint. - OWIEEE Who, it IS a hair.
8 April 1999
Garfield, the weekend has officially started! - - Yup, we are now one minute into the weekend. Wake me when it's over.
9 April 1999
I'm off to conquer the world! - - Maybe the world is this way. I wouldn't know.
10 April 1999
tap tap - - - pat pat pat BURP - - Mint? Why, thank you. - You know, if you're not careful, you're going to spoil me.
11 April 1999
This isn't water... - This is COOKING OIL! - So much for sparrow fondue.
12 April 1999
I'm going to stand motionless in the backyard. - Until lunch. - If you know what I mean. Get back here!
13 April 1999
I may look like a cat, but I'm actually a REALLY big sparrow. - - We must do a worm sometime.
14 April 1999
- CHOMP - Hey! Where's my rubber ducky?!
15 April 1999
- - Mrs. Feeney, I may have a clue to the fate of "Mister Sweetywings".
16 April 1999
May I please eat you for lunch? - No, you may not. - Civilty is overrated.
17 April 1999
- - Yeees! - - - The ice cubes have hardened! - Garfield! How many times have I told you never to make eye contact with tha tman?!
18 April 1999
I'm in good mood. - - I wonder if I'm up to something?
19 April 1999
Starting contest! - - At each other, you idiot!
20 April 1999
That's odd. - Ever have deja vu? No. - That's ood.
21 April 1999
My future is looking bright! - - CRAMP! CRAMP! Has the future started yet?
22 April 1999
Ever hear one of those voices inside you, Garfield? - A voice telling you to do something wild and crazy?... - I'm putting on a kilt! Obeying his inner nerd.
23 April 1999
Jon isn't speking to me. - I think. - I'm not listening to him.
24 April 1999
Hmmm... - I feel like a snack...maybe that last piece of pie... - BURP - Or those two hot dogs... BURRRRRRP BURRRRRRP - Or the three buffalo wings... BRAAP BRAAP BRAAP - Or the six-pack of soda pop... YURP-YURP YURP-YURP YURP-YURP - Is there
25 April 1999
Catch the cat! Catch the cat! - Say, isn't that a tail? - Catch the tail! Catch the tail! Dogs...you gotta love 'em.
26 April 1999
Beware Of Dog What's this? - This sign is past its expiration date. - Hi!
27 April 1999
What a pathetic excuse for a dog! - Grrr - Check that...
28 April 1999
Hey, dog. Your x-rays are back. - See that tiny dot? That's your brain. - Why can't we all just learn to laugh at ourselves?!
29 April 1999
Beware of Insulting Dog. - I wonder what that means? - Excuse me, SIR. When is the litter due? Ahhh.
30 April 1999