Another day has gone by. - Why shouldn't it? - We sure did nothing to stop it.
1 April 2000
click - ...get rich through real estate! click - ...and now we'll pait a happy little deer by our little brook... click - ...burn fat! Add muscle! click - ...just rub on and watch those wrinkles melt away! click - ...it slices! It dices! -
2 April 2000
You ate one of my goldfish! - Now this one will be sad and lonely! - Just sad. GARFIELD!
3 April 2000
Hey, hey. - You know, it's bad luck to eat a goldfish! - So, I'll stay out of the casinos.
4 April 2000
Garfield! You ate my goldfish! Did not! - Did too! Did not! - Did too!
5 April 2000
Have you no shame? - Shame...shame... - Nope.
6 April 2000
Garfield, have you met my new goldfish? Why yes, I... - ! - PTOO clonk
7 April 2000
Full moon tonight. - That's when I turn into a primal beast. - I see I'm not alone. - Go ahead. Stick your hand in here.
8 April 2000
Wow! - Look at that pretty girl in the water, Garfield! I'll get her attention! - SHARK! - YAAAHHH! EEEEK! YAAA! - Look...here she comes! - SLAP! How dare you panic all those people! - Well, it can't get any worse than this. You called?
9 April 2000
Boy, this is taking forever. - tap tap - Stop signs don't turn green, you dip.
10 April 2000
I'm hungry. - What are you doing in the glove compartment, Garfield? Looking for a snack. - Care to join me? We have ketchup, mustard, relish, salt and soy sauce.
11 April 2000
Jon cleaned his windshield this morning, and guess what that means... - SPLAP - You got it. YAAAH!
12 April 2000
Two Happy Burgers. You don't sound happy. - I said, two Happy Burgers, pal! - Well, maybe you'll like a Grumpy Burger. - HAPPY BURGERS! Would you like some rude fries with that?
13 April 2000
I'm expecting an important call. - - Even a WRONG NUMBER could be important! I'll leave you alone with your fantasies.
14 April 2000
Garfield, there's a rat out there! - It's big enought to eat a dog! - So, do something! * Heere, Odie!
15 April 2000
- - - - - scritch scritch scritch - "Dear Diary..." Har-dee-har, har, har, Arbuckle.
16 April 2000
hammer hammer hammer hammer WHACK! - MOMMY! - Uh, I mean, ow! Too late.
17 April 2000
Yah. Paper cut. - YAAH Envelope cut. - THAAAH And that would be the stamp.
18 April 2000
Ah gah a papah on my thung licking ahn anvewope. - Potato chip? Thunks. - NYAAH GAAHH NYAH NYAH GAH GAH GAH Fun with salt.
19 April 2000
hammer hammer hammer hammer WHACK! - OWWwwsaaay... - THAT'S an interesting shade... Wave bye-bye to Mr. Fingernail.
20 April 2000
saw saw saw saw saw sa- Oops. - Boy, I hope that can be sewn back on. - Hey, I lost a button...Garfield?
21 April 2000
hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer - hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer hammer - BOY, this is a long nail. Try hitting it with your forehead.
22 April 2000
- - - - -
23 April 2000
We need a change. - - How's that? It's a start.
24 April 2000
The tablecloth just isn't enough. We really need to spice this place up. - -
25 April 2000
THE TOILET IS OVERFLOWING! - - Odie's cup runneth over.
26 April 2000
DING ** DONG - - There's a dictionary salesman who's like to have a word with you.
27 April 2000
I'm thinking positively, Garfiel. That phone WILL ring, it WILL be a woman, and she WILL go out with me! - * RIING HELLO! - Well? I'm taking mom to Bingo saturday.
28 April 2000
Garfield, don't mess with my new plant. - It's very expensive. - And exotic. And friendy.
29 April 2000
- - SMACK! - - SMACK! - Garfield, what are you doing? I'm practicing being exasperated. - I'm videotaping my sock drawer! SMACK!
30 April 2000