Sigh We should do something. How about mailing Mrs. Feeny's little dog to an obscure overseas nation with insufficient postage? Or we could thumb wrestle for that last piece of cheesecake. Or we could hijack an ice cream truck andhold the driver hostage f
1 April 2001
Garfield, three mice just walked through the front door. Havan't you heard? They were carrying suitcases! The cheese expo is in town.
2 April 2001
Hmmm...what should I do about this new mousehole? Of course! Accept a bribe!
3 April 2001
Garfield, this is a diagram of the food chain. You're here, and that's a mouse down there... Any questions? Where's pizza?
4 April 2001
Woof Uh...Garfield?... Yey, I know. They're making dogs smaller these days, aren't they?
5 April 2001
SNAP! OUCH! SNAP! OUCH! SNAP! OUCH! He'll give up, eventually. May I have the bait?
6 April 2001
We need a fourth for bridge. Okay, but this time we use MY cards. Last game I about went blind.
7 April 2001
You're going to hurt me now, aren't you? Unless you act posthaste to rectify this unfortunate situation.
8 April 2001
Garfield, if you exercised you'd have more energy. And that's good. Ah.
9 April 2001
A, springtime! A time when...uh...um... What DOES happen in springtime? You hold your arm in the air?
10 April 2001
Garfield, you meed to do some work. Uh huh. You can help me in the garden. Sure. I made this little plow. You have WAAAY too much time on your hand.
11 April 2001
I got you a surprise, Garfield! But I can't find it. It wouldn't have been, sorta, kinda resembled a (burp) box of donuts, would it?
12 April 2001
My date said she hates me more than almost anything. ALMOST anything. I caught that.
13 April 2001
I am bored, Garfield. I need some excitement. Maybe I'll sit on the roof! Joooon?! The fire department said never do that again.
14 April 2001
What a nice day for a walk in the woods. Pooky! What are you doing out here?! I thought I left you at the camp... ...site... Momma!
15 April 2001
Hi, mom...I miss you too. Yes, I realize it's been a long time since I visited you... Yeeesss, I realize you're not getting any younger... I'll pack my food bowl and teddy bear.
16 April 2001
I just love car trips... They make me feel like SINGING! SLAM! SLAM! Boys?...Boys?
17 April 2001
Mom! Jonny! Dad! Son! Jelly belly! Lame brain! Brothers.
18 April 2001
Good to see you again, son. You're looking well. Thanks...you too, dad. Well, got chores to do. Better go unpack. (sniff) A real father-son moment.
19 April 2001
Garfield isn't much for the farm life, is he, Jonny? I guess not, mom. But he'll learn to cope. AAAGGHH! Only THREE channels?!!
20 April 2001
See that, Garfield? Those are sheep. Look like dust bunnies with legs. That's where wool comes from. Hold on... If this is anything like that chicken/egg thing, I DON'T wanna know.
21 April 2001
Sure is a beautiful sunset, dad. Yup. Sunsets are very popular on the farm... Very popular.
22 April 2001
What are you? I'm a rooster. What do you do? I wake you up at the crack of dawn. I didn't hear the rooster this morning. I imagine it's tough to crow with baling twine tied around one's beak.
23 April 2001
Remember that tree, Jon? Our bull chased you up that tree. Yeah, dad. Boy, you were stuck up there a LONG time... I remember, dad. How old were you? Seven and eight.
24 April 2001
So how's life in the big city, Jon? It's wild! Sometimes I stay up till ten. MA!
25 April 2001
Farming can be dangerous, Garfield. There are warning signs all over. -"Do not tickle the bull"? That's a biggie.
26 April 2001
I have a girlfriend now, Jon. Really? Want to see a picture of her? Sure! What do you think? Saaaay... That's one shiny tooth.
27 April 2001
I'd like to stay and visit, Jon, but I have a date. Look at that ugly holstein over there. That's my date. You shouldn't wear polka dots, lady.
28 April 2001
skitter skitter *click* Scout to base... No sign of cat...proceed. WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! Scout to base...uh, how's your sense of humor?
29 April 2001
This room would look better with less cat hair. There's no cat hair in here except what's on me. Hey!
30 April 2001