- slup - - jiggitta jiggitta jiggitta jiggitta - ZORK - FFFFNNNNNNNNNNN - NONG NONG NONG NONG NONG - A little espresso goes a long way.
1 July 2001
CRASH! - CRASH! CRASH! CRASH! CRASH! - That Odie is not a plate catcher. I hear nothing.
2 July 2001
You know, most cats don't get to have ice cream. - All right! - All the more for me!
3 July 2001
You seem content, Jon. - Looks like I got her ejust in time. - Go away, Garfield. I'm here to suck the joy out of your life.
4 July 2001
Odie sure is enjoying that rawhide chew I gave him. - I can't find my new belt. - That explains the buckle.
5 July 2001
I feed Jon's canary every day. - It's a selfless act on my part. - But soon it will be harvest time.
6 July 2001
Does this outfit make me look mysterious? - Absolutely! - I think dorks are very mysterious.
7 July 2001
Beware of Dog - Beware of Dog - Beware of Dog - Beware of Dog - WHOOMP - Treee Doooog!
8 July 2001
Spiders were not meant to be squished! We are feeling, living beings! We are- - - SOMEBODY GRAB A HOUSE SLIPPER, QUICK!
9 July 2001
So, I see you have a walking cast now. Yeah. - I'd ask you to sign it, but I hate your stinking guts, you fat tub of lard! -
10 July 2001
You may squish me, but you'll never squish my spirit! - KER SMACK - How's your spirit, Stewart? Bite me, Mikey.
11 July 2001
I want you to squish my lousy no-good husband! - Then I want you to pound him into mulch, and the rip his legs off and stuff them down his craw! - He gave you vacuum cleaner bags for your wedding anniversary again, didn't he? CANISTER bags!
12 July 2001
Have you seen my sister? - SMACKO - Have you seen my brother? I think so. Does he look like this?
13 July 2001
See the cat today= Yep. - And he DIDN'T squish you?! Oh, sure he did. - This is a black body cast. donk donk
14 July 2001
- - - Garfield... - I wouldn't keep teasing the dog in that pickup. - You never know when we might come to a red light. - Like this one.
15 July 2001
Cats are very complicated. - You're a lump. - Cats are very complicated lumps.
16 July 2001
Says here a cat will always land on its feet. - - Riiight. I subscribe to the "bounce" school of thought.
17 July 2001
Jon's iced tea. - flick - A la Garfield.
18 July 2001
I'll go get the broom... - And sweep up all that cat hair. OKay, but first... - I'd just like to stand here and admire it awhile.
19 July 2001
You know what I love about cats, Garfield? You're so refined... - HAAAACK!! - Ahem...you were saying?
20 July 2001
Life offers us many challenges. - And that's why I'm going to hide behind the couch. - Don't tell life.
21 July 2001
- - - - - - Can you PLEASE speed it up a little?! Flea dip day.
22 July 2001
I am a magic donut! - I can grant you any wish! - How about a glass of milk?
23 July 2001
All of us have a destiny, Garfield. - I wonder what my place in history will be? - Somewhere between Floyd the Whistling Snake and crab grass.
24 July 2001
Odie is trying to annoy me. - He's making that noise I hate. - That continouous breathing sound.
25 July 2001
Do you ever stop to realize all you out me through?! - - You know, I never did!
26 July 2001
I've tried every girl in my address book except Loretta Gnish. - - I wonder if she ever had surgery to remove that third nostril? He's weakening.
27 July 2001
You forgot my birthday. - No, I didn't. - I didn't care.
28 July 2001
Garfield! - Garfield! I'm stuck in the wall! - Don't ask how...just DO somethin! - - - - Okay, you're having a cruel laugh at my expense, aren't you?
29 July 2001
Did you bring the paper in? - - GARFIELD! Kidding! I saved the funnies!
30 July 2001
I wonder what time it is? - ** OW! ** OW! ** OW! - It's three. Too close to the cuckoo clock.
31 July 2001