Ambition! Drive, fortitude, gumption, determination... I've always wanted to say those words.
1 November 2004
Time to take a break, Odie. Our breaks are so long, our breaks need breaks.
2 November 2004
Ah...AH... CHOO! So, would you like some toast? Not in this lifetime.
3 November 2004
Sometimes I sleep so much I can't tell if it's day or night. Sometimes I eat so much I can't tell if I'm hungry or full. Ignorance is bliss.
4 November 2004
Oh, Ellen... My love for you is like an endless void... Wait! Wrong smile! That's the one about your head.
5 November 2004
Sack time. Z
6 November 2004
Beware of Dog GRRRR Just look at this... Why do dogs always need "beware" signs? We cats don't NEED "beware" signs...people just KNOW... WOW...you're right. I WANNA SIGN! SMACK! poo!
7 November 2004
There are things in life we just have to admit we can't control. Like you. Yeah, I'm a real force of nature.
8 November 2004
Hey, I know I'm fat...so what? I'm fat, and I'm BEAUTIFUL! Narcissism...use it or lose it
9 November 2004
Say, good lookin'. You look fabulous! Hey, mirrors need love, too.
10 November 2004
Oh, geez. I need a haircut bad. Try shedding, it's cheaper!
11 November 2004
I thought I was going to seize the day... But the day seized me instead. Poor Jon. Life's a salad bar, and he just keeps smacking his forehead on the sneeze guard.
12 November 2004
So, how was YOUR day? Better then yours.
13 November 2004
Brrrr! Mmmmmmmm MMMMMMMMM -
14 November 2004
Operators are standing by to take your order! I won't be ordering anything...you may take the rest of the night off. Hello? Hello?
15 November 2004
And now, back to our nature special... Sharks who love toes. -
16 November 2004
We have a great show! And we know you'll enjoy it! Nobody tells me wht to do. CLICK
17 November 2004
Welcome back to "Telepathic Jokes"! Already heard it. CLICK
18 November 2004
I love hosting this show. -Absolutely love it! It means I don't have to WATCH it. I wish *I* hosted it.
19 November 2004
Oh, Lance, the bomb is about to go off! Don't worry, Marion. Here comes Super Dog to save us! Bark! Bark! Bark! Where is he going?! Spotted a squirrel.
20 November 2004
SLAM! Look at what I bought at the store, Garfield... A 20-pound turkey! We can roast it, and eat it, and then use the leftovers for sandwiches! Why did I say "leftovers"? What are leftovers?
21 November 2004
Garfield, are you happy? No food, no happy.
22 November 2004
Come on out! No! Come and get me, bozo! Dinner, Garfield? No thanks. I just ate a small house.
23 November 2004
That was a nutritious meal! Yeah, I didn't like it either.
24 November 2004
Garfield! Dinner! Disappointed? Kinda.
25 November 2004
There you are! I love lasagna! But alas, it was only a fling.
26 November 2004
Garfield, Garfield, Garfield. Just look at you... He's right...I DO look hungry.
27 November 2004
GROAN Z EEEYRRRGH! GROWWWL! HUFF HUFF HUFF AAARRRGGH! pant pant pant The dryer shrunk my pants! It's always the dryer. It's never digging out at the family reunion.
28 November 2004
Christmas is coming, and you know what that means... That's EXACTLY what that means.
29 November 2004
Hey, you! Christmas is coming...get with the program! That's more like it.
30 November 2004