It's new year's eve resolution time, Garfield. Go for it. - This year I resolve to grow a moustache! - A bigm HONKING moustache! - And I resolve to work out! - And to let my hair grow long and wavy! - And to put you on a diet. - Heck with it.
It's the "All-Remote" channel! click - So put that remote down, guys! We click through every channel for you! click click click - FINALLY! A channel that takes all the work out of being lazy. click click click click
Garfield, why don't women like me? - They all say, "Oh, Jon, you're so nice...you'll make someone a wonderful husband," but I'm never right for them. - Why, Garfield, why?!! Because they're lying to you, Jon.
Z - BUMP! What was that? - I heard something go bump in the night! - BUMP! There it is again! ...it's getting louder! It's coming this way! - BUMP! The bump in the night is coming for me!! - BUMP! EEEYAAAAHHH!! - It's cold out here. I THED
We have with us tonight a man who hasn't spoken in 32 years. Good evening, sir. Good eve- - Uh...can I take that back? No, sir. You distinctly spoke. - No, I didn't. There! You spoke again! His lips aren't really moving that much.
- Good evening. - We ask that you please remain seated for the duration of the performance... - ...and to kindly hold your applause until the show's conclusion. - Also, no smoking, talking, flash photography, beepers, laser pointers, or cell
- One cookie left... - That one old cookie that's lain in the bottom of the jar forever. - Covered in the ancient dust of a million other cookies and the fingerprints of a million grimy hands. - ...stale, rock hard, and hideously
Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, - -Please, please, please, please, please, please go out with me. - One more "please" might have done it. No, that would have sounded like begging.
I have ESP. - I know exactly what you're going to say. - I'm going to pull your ears over your head and tie them into a knot. Then I'm going to stretch your upper lip over your chin, and then I'm going to pull your right shoe off and stuff it
The good night kiss was a disaster. - I missed her face and kissed her bug zapper. - Now my back fillings are picking up a hula station on Maui. Hey! Do you suppose there's an all-night luau joint around here?
bip bip boop - Hi, Ellen? It's Jon! How have you been? - Great! And work, how's work? ...oh, good to hear! - Hey, listen, Ellen, I suppose you're wondering why I called... - You see, it's been quite a while since I had a date... - And I'm
Let's see...what should I wear when I take you to see Dr. Liz... - Do you think I should bring flowers? To a vet appointment?! - I wonder if it's too late to grow a moustache? Oh, this just has fun written all OVER it.
- Why are you visiting the vet? For a checkup. I'm fine, actually. - Are you sure? You look a little green around the gills. Really? - And there's that scratchy throat thing going around... Cough! - -that escalates into fierce hacking
Please excuse me, whoever you are...I need to go and powder my nose. - Boy, she really DOES have amnesia, Garfield. What are we gonna do? Amnesia, huh? - So, she won't remember if she ate her dessert or not... Don't even think about it.
I don't believe it! - Liz is out with another guy!...but why?! - I bet if I disguise dmyself as a french waiter I could find out what was going on over there. - But that would be incredibly stupid, wouldn't it? Absolutely. - - - I'm goin' in.
Liz, why are you going out with THIS guy? What do you mean, "THIS GUY"? - YOU said your social calendar was all booked up... - I was trying to impress you! Well, I had to go out with SOMEone, didn't I? Hey! I'm SITTING RIGHT HERE!
Two, please. How did Garfield deal with having to stay home tonight, Jon? - He was pretty broken up about it, but he's gotta learn that you and I need time for ourselves. - If you'd like pepperoni, press one.
- Don't even think about it, cat. - If you take one step closer, I'll call for reinforcements. - OKAY, GET HIM, MEN! - CLANK CLUNK CLINK CLANK CLUNK CLANK CLANK CLINK - Allright! A sushi bar! - This didn't have quite the effect I was hoping
Dr. Wilson is with a patient right now, Mr. Arbuckle. Can I take a message? - Uh huh? ...dinner tonight? ...where? ...formal dress or casual? ...what time? ...will you be bringing flowers? ... - What are my intentions? She's good.
This is fun, Jon. What would you like to do for dinner? - Why don't we just order chinese food and watch an old Christmas movie o TV? - He gets emotional around the holidays, doesn't he? Actually, I think it was the chinese food that did it.
- I heard something... - Did you hear something? - It sounded like big boots clomping around! - And look! The cookies are gone! - You don't suppose... clomp clomp clomp clomp CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP - munch munch munch munch
- * I'm glad you could come over, Liz. Me too. - You're going to experience a real Arbuckle Family New Year's! 10...9...8... - 7...6...5... OK, get ready! - 4...3...2...1... Here it comes! - HAPPY NEW YEAR! Z