Why doesn't your owner let you run free? I mangle cats. Freedom is overrated.
1 September 2006
I'm in a really, really bad mood. Hey, Jon! You gotta see this!
2 September 2006
SLAM! I guess I don't have to ask how this date went.
3 September 2006
I wonder what Liz sees in me, Garfield... Could it be my rugged-yet-sensitive good looks? STOP BITING YOUR LIP!
4 September 2006
Hi, Liz! ...a what? A veterinary lecture? Tonight? Sure! Sounds like fun! I wonder what you wear to one of those. A sincere look of feigned interest.
5 September 2006
I'm looking forward to this lecture tonight, Liz. Really? Most people find them pretty boring. Not me! Oh, are you an authority on veterinary medicine? No, I'm an authority on boring.
6 September 2006
I've never been to a veterinary lecture before. Care for some popcorn? Um...no thanks, sweetie.
7 September 2006
What's the screen for? This doctor shows slides with his lectures. So it's like a show, huh? This oughta be. Is that a bowel? Not a healthy one.
8 September 2006
Liz and I went to dinner, and then to a veterinary lecture. It was titled, "Life cycle of the tapeworm". I shouldn't have ordered the spaghetti. Hungry again, are we?
9 September 2006
Oh, forget it! Works every time. -
10 September 2006
Hey, mouse, what's shakin'? I don't think that's any of your business, fatso. Mice are touchy before they've had their morning cheese.
11 September 2006
Did you ever get a song stuck in your head? And you just can't stop humming it? If cat food jingles count, yes.
12 September 2006
I have something to do! I was lying. Well, that counts as something.
13 September 2006
Why does your sign say, "Beware of Cats"? Because cats are mean. Take it down or I'll beat you with it. SEE?
14 September 2006
Hey, where's the cake that was in the oven? munch munch It hasn't risen yet! BA-GOING! NOW you tell me.
15 September 2006
It looks like you're going to spend all day in bed! All right! Is this some kind of trick?
16 September 2006
17 September 2006
Garfield, you're not jealous of me seeing Liz, are you? No? Don't flatter yourself.
18 September 2006
L like Liz a lot, Garfield... But I'm not going to rush into anything really serious. It's not like I'm ready to show her my sock drawer. You should save that for your wedding night.
19 September 2006
Liz laughed at all my jokes tonight. Is it wrong to question her sense of humor? In your case, no.
20 September 2006
Garfield, now that Jon and I are dating, I hope you and I can be friends. That won't be easy. It's hard to be friends with someone who's seen you naked.
21 September 2006
Liz, I really like you. I like you too, Jon. I think it's time we took our relationship to the next level. Oh? Polka-Karaoke night!! Welcome to our world, baby.
22 September 2006
Pizza tonight! Hey! Where did you hid the knobs to the stove?! Make mine half pepperoni, half double pepperoni.
23 September 2006
PLAY PLAY REW PLAY REW PLAY Whatcha' watching? Oh, just some treasured moments.
24 September 2006
Hungry? I hate to be a bother.
25 September 2006
Tonight's delicacy is... "Vulture Pot Pie" Well! Who's eating who NOW, huh, fella?
26 September 2006
This evening we're featuring "Winged Things". "Choice cuts of chicken, turkey, owl, falcon, emu, and penguin". "Artificial sparrow flavoring added". That's what gives it its zing.
27 September 2006
Missing Have You Seen Me? All right, all right! I ate the last cookie!
28 September 2006
Hey! I wanted a donut, too! Very well, you may have the one off the end.
29 September 2006
30 September 2006