- rrrrrrr - ding a ling a ling a ling a ling a ling - grrrrrrr - ding a ling a ling a ling a ling a ling - grrrrrrrrrrr - ding a ling a ling a ling a ling Hello? Hello? We have too many ding-a-lings around here.
Thanks for the coffee, cup. No problem...and call me Joe. - You know, Joe, as far as nightmares go, this one could have been a whole lot worse. How? - It could have been decaffeinated. Now you're scaring ME, man.
Only one person in this room could have murdered Mr. Thompson, and that person IS... - Oh...a question. Yes, you with the pickax? - Um...may I be excused? And to think I could have been watching Jon's socks tumble dry.
Now don't you worry about a thing, Mr. Lardmuckle. We'll be just fine. - If you get worried, just give me a call. Thanks...I might. - I'll have the phone beside me all night. You are so gonna pay for this.
Thank you for coosing "Xan's Cafe Caffeine." I'm Xan, and I'll be your barista. - Prepare yourself for a relaxing and spiritual awakening for the body and mind. How may I help you? - Um...two coffees, please. This is a joke, right.
Okay, I'll talk to you soon... - Bye, Liz...yeah...me, too... - You want me to WHAT?! - - Liz, I can't kiss the phone...my cat is watching. - Yeah, I know that sounds weird. - Just trust me on this. One time for the camera phone, come on!
sigh... - Pooky, you're my best friend. - You're always there for me. - You give me hugs when I need them. - And you never tell me to go on a diet. - I can't imagine a day without you! - Now, more over, you're hogging the bed.
Hi, I'd like to request a song. - It's called "Polka in my Veins, Sauerkraut in my Lederhosen". - I thought morning deejays were supposed to be zany. I'm sure he meant "you sick freak" in the zaniest possible way.
I'm afraid there's been no word from the governor, Rocky...looks like this is it. - What do you want for your last meal? Gimme a cheeseburger. - And would you like that (hee hee) for here or to (snort) go? Rocky's not smiling.
I'm sorry about your date tonight, Liz. It was different. - I've never seen a restaurant run out of food before. That happens to us all the time. - And I've never been thrown out of an aquarium. That too.
XAN'S Cafe Caffeine - You know, this coffee bar is a nice place. - Very cosmopolitan...a really hip clientele... - And these cafe lattes are pretty darn good. - SLURP - I don't know why we don't go out more often. I do.
future..." - "...you are wonderful beyond measure, and everyone treasures you dearly". - Kind of flowery, but not bad. Now let's see what MINE says... crack - "It stinks to be you". I like mine better.
Throw the switch, Igor! ...give my monster life!! ZZT - Hello. Have you really given careful thought to your long-term insurance needs? - I have a policy here that I think you'd love. SHUT IT OFF! SHUT IT OFF! I can't look.
I'm looking for a gift for my girlfriend. How about perfume? - I'm sure she'd love this one... It smells like an acre of wet dogs. - It's the one I'M wearing. And I LOVE the smell of wet dogs! Quit now, while you're behind.
click - BUY THESE! - TAKE THEM HOME AND STUFF 'EM IN YOUR MOUTH!! - CHEW THEM! SWALLOW THEM!! - So BUY THEM! - And EAT them! EAT them!! EAT THEM!!! - Oh, PULEEEEZE BUY THEM!!! Ed's International House of Fruitcakes.
I got a Christmas card from Dog Boy! - "Merry Christmas, you late-chuggin', tofu-huggin', cable TV-watchin', indoor-plumbin', touchy-feely, sissified-crybaby city boy". - I miss him. Me too...just like I miss tail mange.