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Garfield

Well, Garfield, we survived another holiday season. Now all we have to do is survive another year. Or just today. Have I told you how much I enjoy these little pep talks?

1 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'd like to forget the bad times. The ceiling needs mopping. But it's hard to keep up.

2 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

GAAAAAAAA The first and last annual meeting of the Polar Bear Club will now come to order. AAAA AAHH HHHH HHHH

3 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

There's only one way to get ahead in this world. Sponge off someone else! Hard work. Whoa, there are TWO ways?!

4 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You know that loose board on the porch? I finally nailed it back down! I heard. Let's see what's next on my list. Screams like that really carry.

5 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Arlene, you look nice today. Why, thank you, Garfield, so do you. Don't you know it! Aaand the moment has passed.

6 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This is one of my favorite spots. You don't say.

7 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The living room is OFF LIMITS tonight, guys. Liz and I are watching TV. But we don't WANNA watch TV. We wanna watch you and Liz. wink wink

8 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Donuts are bad for you, you know. And I love it when you're bad.

9 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, let's see... No. No. No. Now, that looks nice! But this is just my blue shirt with a necktie! You look very handsome. I will NEVER understand women. Like that's a requirement.

10 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

pat pat pat Mrs. Feeny is o the phone. She's fast -

11 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Some people just don't look so good after they diet.

12 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's Supergarfield. And his trusty sidekick, Odieboy! Hey, Odieboy, that's MY superpower! Z

13 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's not easy being a crime fighter around here. Because there isn't any crime. Except what Odieboy did to the rug last thursday.

14 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Come, Odieboy! Time to do battle with our enemies! Actually, those pzzas weren't REALLY our enemies. Wait. I spoke too son.

15 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odieboy is being held captive! By his archrival... The LEASH!

16 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

FRRT! FRRT! FRRT! FRRT! FRRT! FRRT! HONK HONK HONK FRRT! FRRT! FRRT! PHHHT PHHHT HONK HONK HONK FRRT FRRT FRRT SNORT SNORT SNORT PHHHT HONK HONK FRRRT FRRRT B-BLL B-BLL B-BLL SNORT SNORT PHHHT PHHHT HONK HONK FRRT FRRT B-BLL B-BLLB-BLL SNORT PHHHT HONK FR

17 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Well, the polar ice caps are melting. So? From now on, *I* set the thermostat! Oh, sure! Blame me!

18 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Beware Of Dog Thrills Galore! You Must Be This Tall To be Bitten >

19 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You know...my life isn't perfect... All you do is sleep! ...regardless of what others think.

20 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Donut Shop Where should we go on our next vacation, Garfield? Funny you should ask!...

21 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We can get a lot from books. For instance... I'm now taller!

22 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

dingle dingle BOINK Uh-oh. Nothing good can come from this.

23 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD! WAKE UP! IT'S SNOWING! -

24 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I will NEVER understand crossword puzzles. That's sudoku, you dip. What's a three-letter word for "five"?

25 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

8 I'll do my OWN Sudoku, thank you!

26 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Doing the Sudoku puzzle? Yeah. I've been working on it all day. I finished mine while I ate breakfast. -

27 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

-

28 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

erase erase erase erase Sigh... I may have figured out what "Sudoku" means... I think it's Japanese for AAAARRRGGHHH!! Hey, that was in my crossword puzzle!

29 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I did it! It took me all week, but I finally did it! I finished a Sudoku! Perhaps you should celebrate by bathing.Garfield, this is my life. Cleaning up cat hair. How sad is that? Now, about my litter box...

30 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hide me! I just escaped from the zoo! And you are? Duh! The king of the jungle! With THAT hair? What's wrong with it? Oh, where to start... And you are? Furious with my stylist. You beast.

31 January 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Who wants to scratch me behind the ears? Ah! A volunteer!

1 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield! GARFIELD! Didn't you hear me calling you? I assumed you were shouting my name for the sheer pleasure of it.

2 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I have a headache. You have a head? Please! Don't make me think! Sorry.

3 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon! I missed you! Now I miss missing you.

4 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's do something. Like what? Something fun! No way! You know how I hate trying new thinga.

5 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Maybe Jon would treat me nicer... If I treated HIM nicer. Or, I could just fake an injury. You okay, pal?

6 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And now, a word from our sponsor. Friends, how many times has THIS happened to YOU? BAM! BAM! BAM! GAAAHHH! MY THUMB!!! *BUMP* SSSSSS YAAHH! HOT STOVE!! WHIRRRRRRRRRRRRRR AGGA AGGA AGGA AGGA NECKTIE IN THE BLENDER!!! If this is YOU,then you need Honko's C

7 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SLAM! THAT was a short date. Liz sent me home to change. My eyes!

8 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

*click* send How about that? Burn the jacket!

9 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

There's no WAY you can't like THIS suit! Is this a genetic thing? No, it's seersucker. Tiddy boom.

10 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, I'm ready to go out! NO plaid. How about now? NO tie-dye. I told you, NO ugly ANYTHING. Poof! There went the whole wardrobe!

11 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey! Here's a clean shirt! I don't know why I've never worn this one... SPOOT!

12 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz thinks I have no fashion sense. Well, I'll show her! Where's my paisley ascot? I'd better close the drapes.

13 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Chez EATS I bet Garfield was a cute kitten. Oh, he was... Wanna see a picture? You keep a picture of your cat as a kitten...in your wallet? Sure! SMOOOOOCH I owe you one, Garfield. Lips that touch vets shall never touch mine!

14 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sorry I'm late! I lost track of the time! I will not dignify that comment with a response. "Lost track of time"...get it?

15 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Welcome to our humble home! And boooooooy, is this place humble.

16 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's good to be alive! I agree. Not great..."good".

17 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You know what the world needs more of? Frosting? Niceness. With frosting on it!

18 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I've been awake for 72 hours! Not in a row, mind you, but that's still a lot!

19 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ever want want anything you know you can't have, Garfield? Yup. -like morality? Nope. -like fame? Like 25 hours of sleep every day!

20 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Beware Of The Dog Pick a card...any card...go ahead! Don't tell me! Don't tell me! It's the three of clubs! Nope. Yes, it is! No, it isn't. BARK! BARK! BARK! I knew this would turn ugly.

21 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Level one: YAAAAHH! Level one: EEEEEEK! Level one: AIIIIYYYEE! Level one: GAAAHHH! How's the video game going?

22 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Here we go... Level one: YAAAAGGHH! Impressive graphics. It says you're supposed to reattach your head and try again.

23 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You must save the princess. Choose your character. BOOP "Sir Whines-A-Lot"?! That's the one I always choose! I want to be Sir Whines-A-Lot!! Talk about your type-casting.

24 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

O.L., you have a choice here...you can either squish my guy, or take the chest full of gold coins! sQUISH! Why? Money isn't everything.

25 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Congratulations! You saved the princess! -

26 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Congratilations! You saved the princess! -

27 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh... I keep a framed picture of Liz beside my bed... She's the screen saver on my computer, too. Plus, I carry a snapshot of her in my wallet... And I put her picture on my cell phone. I guess I just can't get enough of her. Ihear you, man. I feel the

28 February 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield! Read the shirt, bozo. Do Not Disturb I'm fine, thanks for asking!

1 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Here comes the future! Here it is! Gee, it was a lot like the past.

2 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, no! SLAP Coming Soon To This Site: Nature Am I the only one concerned about the plight of our nation's mini malls?

3 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What? Tell me what I've done. Because I'd like to do it again!

4 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This stealing food stuff has got to stop. Understood? Understood. Okay, give me a hug. That is one ugly photo I.D. Hey!

5 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm making big plans for the future, Garfield! For starters, I'm hoping to get a pen with ink in it. Whoa, getting a little ambitious there, aren't we?

6 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Who wants to go out? Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Who wants to go back in? Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!

7 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's as if a dark curtain has been lifted from over my soul... My life has MEANING again! New batteries in the TV remote. Can I get a HALLELUJAH!!! click click click click click

8 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We now return to "World's Worst-Dressed" Cool SUIT! Sigh.

9 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Act now! click Fast enough for you, pal?

10 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

A spokesman for the company stated that, "it just vanished completely". Authorities admit that this just may have been "the perfect crime". There's an ice cream truck parked in the garage. You saw nothing.

11 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, Terrence, tell me that you love me! Terrence?...Terrence?... I'm WATCHING the GAME! oooooWEEEE THERE'S a novel new place to park the remote.

12 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Cat Theater presents: "Romeo and Juliet" HACK! CRASH! Hark, what hairball through yonder window breaks? Man, that Shakespeare guy could really write!

13 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

So, Liz... Did you always want to be a vet? Oh, yeah... Ever since I was a little girl. I just love helping animals... Their love is so unconditional. I'll purr for a donut.

14 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, you lack ambition... and personality... and self-control, and tact, and comparison, adn... We may be here for a while.

15 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Every name means something, Garfield. I'm looking mine up. "Jon...he who gets beat up for his lunch money". Now that's just scary.

16 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Then he started kicking me!

17 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

"Cat Owner's Survey...question one" "Does your cat clean himself?" Check. Where's the moisturizing, volumizing, detangling conditioner?

18 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Bark. Is that it? Did I leave something out? No, no. I guess the magic is gone....

19 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Is MY donut good, Garfield? Enjoying MY donut, are you? Look. An unguarded donut is MY donut.

20 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hmm... It says here that cats are smarter than dogs... Check. ...and that cats are starter than humans... Check. ...and that cats should be pampered... Big check. ...And that cats are a gift to mankind, and should be worshipped...Checkaroon! ...and that c

21 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Shouldn't you be barking at me? Name? Garfield. You're not on the list. Come on! I'm a VERY happening cat!

22 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oom bah bah oom bah bah Oom bah bah ree bop! I was expecting to be barked at. Can I, just once, try something a little different?! I prefer the classics.

23 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! BARK! HAR... Oh, my throat! Time for a nice cup of tea with a little honey. And don't forget the twist of lemon, you big sissy!

24 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

My brother does most of the barking around here. Oooh, I'm so afraid. BARK! BARK! By any chance, is one of you adopted?

25 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You aren't so tough. Oh, what a terrible thing to say! Boo hoo hoo! Oookaaayy, you're tough.

26 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Beware Of The Dog Or Not Z Okay Don't Like they needed a sign...

27 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hi there. Who's that? I am nature. I am the sky. I am the mountain. I am the ocean. Pretty impressive, huh? Uh-huh. If you can't be a cat.

28 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm here to help. See how much less we're getting done as a team?

29 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Something it seems like... I'm just going through the motions... BOOT! CRASH And then pick Odie lands on Jon's toothpick Eiffel tower and it all seems worthwile again!

30 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I think the coffee's a little strong today. It doesn't need a cup.

31 March 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

A new day dawns! The sun is shining! It must be grocery shopping day. I started the car for you!

1 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Farmers' Market Farmers' Market Farmers' ****** That's all that's left.

2 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I miss out on a lot of things. I'm going to brush my upper teeths with one toothpaste, and my lower teeth with another toothpaste! But not nearly enough things.

3 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, LOOK! What? TWANG yoing yoing yoing yoing WAH-HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! Jon, LOOK! Yeah, riiiiiiight. How stupid do you think I am?

4 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

That's me the knight of the homecoming place. I was too nervous to ask any girls at school, so I took my cousin... Cliff was a lousy dancer. Lovely corsage.

5 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Why do I smell peanut butter cookies? I'll check it out. Yes? Lucky for us, she baked a double batch.

6 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You disgusting pig! I wouldn't take that. He was talking to YOU.

7 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Why must everything go right? I mean wrong! See? I can't even gat THAT wrong! I MEAN RIGHT! For those of you keeping track, two wrongs made a right.

8 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This is hour twenty of the Cat Benefit Telethon. Let's check the tote board... Eleven cents! Like cats care.

9 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Life is constantly changing. Then by definition... This must not be life.

10 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We're home now, stupid.

11 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You never show me any gratitude. SLAP Good job, pal. OW! And that's the thanks I get?!

12 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

HOP HOP HOP HOP HOP I shrank my underwear in the dryer. Do that funny walk again!

13 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I washed the car with my favorite old T-shirt today. It felt like I had insulted it. How does one apologize to a t-shirt? Usually in front of a therapist.

14 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I CAN'T throw this t-shirt away, Liz! I've had it for years! Garfield, help me out her! beep. The shirt, please.

15 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz just doesn't understand how a guy FEELS about his favorite t-shirt. You understand, don't you, old buddy? beep. WILL YOU CUT THAT OUT?!!

16 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield! Jon, Jon, Jon, Jon. Why are you staring at me like that? You owe me three "Garfields".

17 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hi, Grafield. Hi, Arlene. How was your dinner? Lousy. Jon burned the pot roast, the gravy was lumpy and the brussels sprouts were soggy. How was yours? I ate a rat. Mint?

18 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm writing a profile of myself for my blog. Of course I had to pad it a bit to make myself sound more brainy. "Can count backward from 100"? Chicks dig smarts.

19 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon's Blog: Today my cat viciously attacked and devoured my precious pet goldfish. Who knew that my cat was capable of such an evil and unspeakable deed? I do have a NAME, you know. SMACK!

20 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I haven't had a single hit on my blog. You'd think people would be interested in what I have to say! Well, they WOULD! Is it sunny in Jonland today?

21 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Today a lady at a Chinese restaurant sneezed on me. ...what was up with *that*?! My blog is getting edgier! There's a snow pea on your shirt.

22 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Nobody ever visits my blog...it's too dull. I guess no one wants to read about an ordinary guy and his cat. Time to make stuff up! Give me an eye patch and a goatee!

23 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

My new call phone has a areally cool ringtone. Want me to play it? It's the only way we're ever going to hear it.

24 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SLAM! You wouldn't believe what happened to me! I went out to get the paper, and my robe got caught on a passing street sweeper. I swept five neighborhoods with my FACE before I could get the driver's attention. It took three firecompanies and a crowbar t

25 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Have some tuna-flavored things. You know what else is tuna flavored? TUNA!

26 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

-

27 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BURP You're disgusting. And we're out of soda.

28 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you seen my brother? Where'd you last see him? Right where you are now. Fomeone geth fiss mard mall moff me! Found 'im.

29 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I hear you're a real tough cat. But you don't scare me. AYIEEEEE!!

30 April 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie! Somebody's at the door! YIP! YIP! YIP! YIP! Huh? It's you, Einstein!

1 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

...and he loves animals too, Mom! This young man of yours sounds nice, dear. What does he do? He's a cartoonist. Mon?... Mom? Lizzie, it's dad. What did you just tell your mother? What's wrong, daddy? She's hyperventilating into a paperbag. I told her my

2 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Why don't we stay in tonight, and have a candlelight dinner for... ...TWO. Bye now.

3 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I had a dream about Liz last night. Oh, me too. She told me she loved me. She told me she loved me, too. It was very romantic. And then I ate a wooly mammoth.

4 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Cheer up, Pooky... Here, I have just the thing... Better.

5 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz's eyes are so beautiful... More beautiful than mine? flutter flutter flutter You're strange. Why do I even bother to keep myself up?

6 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I am NOT embarrassing to be seen with. The bag doesn't lie.

7 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie, here are the rules for today. No barking, running, panting, or slobbering. In other words, today you're a cat.

8 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We wrote a song about you, Garfield. * Oh, the cat is fat, but we don't care! * * And the cat is lazy, but we don't care! * * And the cat is ugly, but we don't caaaaare... * * 'Cause he won't eat us! * He's gonna pay for thosestrings! Shut up, Herman.

9 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The tuna noodle casserole just burst into flames. I'll hose it down, and you get the catsup. We're bachelors, baby.

10 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odd looking ball of yarn. That spaghetti was for dinner!

11 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oiling the floor keeps me from having to walk. Pretty clever, huh? THUD!

12 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Me Me "Me"? I'm a big fan.

13 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Mr. Mayor! The giant radioactive snail is approaching the city! How long have we got, general? Six, seven months, at least. I think I can squeeze in a snack.

14 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

My poor fish! Never to return! BURP! How about a cameo appearance?

15 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BWA-ha-ha!! BWA-HA-HA! Eat more vegetables! They're good for you! I'LL save you! SMACK! PUNCH PUNCH POW! And the world is once again safe for deep-fries treats! Thanks to YOU, Captain Donut! ...for I shall seek out thosevitamin-ridden evildoers, wherever

16 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hold on, you're breaking up... That's a little better... Perfect! Ah, technology!

17 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

New headset. Geek chic.

18 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This texting stuff is hard. I think my thumbs are too fat. How do you tone your thumbs? Channel changer crunches, my man!

19 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We've had enough of your bullying ways, fatso! Strength in numbers! Yeah! Now I know how Gulliver felt.

20 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

click Now THERE'S a good-lokkin' uvula! We have to date tonight.

21 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You know, Garfield, I don't care how lazy you are... I accept you for who you are. Accept me two steps to the left...you're blocking my view of the TV.

22 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello? Yes, I'd like to order a pizza... With canaries. Goldfish. And extra catnip. You don't have tose toppings? Told ya! What if we supply the ingredients?

23 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

These were taken when my mom and dad were dating. He took her out every saturday night. Here they are on their way to town. I've never seen airbags in a buckboard.

24 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ah, the boring life... Quick! Garfield! I need a belt, a fishbowl, and a fire extinguisher!! I sure miss it.

25 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, hi, Arlene. Do you ever think about me, Garfield? Whenever I'm not thinking about me. So that's a "no". Oh, hi, Arlene.

26 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Toothbrushes can't swim. I have a bad feeling.

27 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I forgive you for yelling at me, Jon. Which you'll be doing shortly. CLAW CLAW CLAW GARFIELD!

28 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I AM sick, you know! Would it kill you to show a little compassion?! There, there.

29 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

OK, Liz...bye. That wa sLiz...AGAIN. She's always calling me! It's all "what are you doing?"..."how are you feeling?"..."how's work?"..."did you feed the cat?"... "I'm so excited about our date"..."I

30 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ice cream truck! ding ding There's nothing left but that little bell.

31 May 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

*** You are the worst songbird ever. Not my arrangements, man!

1 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I like to plan big! And do you know why? So you can fail big? That's your smart remark expression.

2 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

R-R-R-R-R-R zzzzzz SNAP SNAP SNAP SNAP zzzzzzzz That was exciting! My turn! zzzzzzzz

3 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ow. Trying to figure life out makes my head hurt. Try having NINE of them to figure out, pal.

4 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Well? Jon, I believe your coffee has crossed that fine line from freshly brewed... To roofing tar.

5 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh... It's my birthday. And nobody remembered. Happy birthday! Did you get me a present? No. Are you throwing me a party? No. Still, it's nice to be remembered.

6 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Echo Point Echo Point Well? Made you go first!

7 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

'night, Jon. Tomorrow's breakfast.

8 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I think you should have a nickname, Garfield. Let's see, what could it be?... How about "Lord Of Lard"? I like it.

9 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

An empty cat food bowl. The world's saddest sight. And in second place, ladies and gentlemen...

10 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What would it be like if cats ruled the world? "If"?!

11 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ol' Shecky was a fun fish. I'll sur emiss him. I guess it's true what they say... "Never eat the entertainment".

12 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield... What kind of birthday cake would you like this year, Garfield? Glad you asked. I've never seen a blueprint for a cake before. And this is the electrical schematic.

13 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Birthdays are about more than just cake and ice cream, you know. Okay, so they're not. You crazy kidder, you.

14 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I may be getting older, but at least I have nine lives. Well, eight anyway. Stupid fuzzy bologna.

15 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I don't know why you're so upset about another birthday... Growing older is just a natural part of life! Just like ear hair and wheezing! You can go now.

16 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What would you like for your birthday this year? A cake? Oh, a BIG cake.

17 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Are you done licking the bowl? These things take time.

18 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Make a wish! Like THAT ever works. DING-DONG Happy birthday, Garfield! I stand corrected.

19 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This is going to be the best day ever! THUD! LEt's say second best. BZZZZT! Still top ten. BAP! I'm going back to bed. This is going to be the best day ever!

20 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, if you ever got out of bed... The world would probably end. No need for panic, world.

21 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

zzzzzzz PLOP! zzzzzz They're learning.

22 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I am king of the house! And I'm going to shred the drapes now. Your majesty.

23 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm on the hunt. Cats are savy trackers. That french fry tells ma a hamburger is in the area.

24 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

* Good news. One of our neighbors now has a Koi pond. BURP Are you the guy with the cat?

25 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz! Mmm! KISS KISS SMOOCH KISS KISS Mwah! That poor picture!

26 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

zzzzz SWISH zzzzzz swish swish swish swish zzzz scree SMACK! SPLOT! SWACK! I'm going to... Hold still!

27 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, no! We're out of kitty treats! Oh, wait... I spoke too soon! Somebody go shopping!

28 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The buffet needs refreshing.

29 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

For Rent About the empty fishbowl... Do you have references?

30 June 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

PRETTY PROUD OF YOURSELF, AREN'T YOU? foo

1 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You can't hurt ME, pal...I'm a PUFFER fish! fffffff phhhhhhhhhhtttttttt

2 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You can't change the past. True. That's why they invented lying.

3 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield! Check out this drawing I did of a pig! I think I really captured its porkness... scribble scribble scribble Pigs don't have wings! They will before you can outdraw me, pablo.

4 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Advice What can I do to stop being such a loser? Hang on... Ask that question again. Miracles

5 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BURP! BURP! We spend too much time together. You're preaching to the choir.

6 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Frankly, I don't know how you can eat cat food. Like this. Let me know if you need the mystery of the roast beef sandwich cleared up.

7 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Camping IS fun.

8 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, Garfield... There's a cat treat in my purse for you. What? I can't hear you.

9 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I would appreciate it if you treated Liz like a member of the family. Okay... But I thought you wanted me to be nice to her.

10 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Trevor... Oh, Trevor, the walls in the parlor are bleeding. Doesn't mean athing, dearest. The solarium ceiling is covered in black flies... Nothing to concern yourself with, cuddleup. The kitchen sink told me to get out of the house...Wouldn't worry about

11 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ha! Ha! Ha! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! Sorry I'm late. I was busy laughing at the "Beware Of Dog" sign. rrrr

12 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

There's something I should be doing, but I can't think of it. Bark at me? Not now! Can't you seen I'm trying to remember something? Ho boy.

13 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'd like to warm up with a few growls before I get to the barking. Ahem. Grr! Grr! Grr! Shouldn't you have done this before I got here?

14 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! Man, that was loid! Where's that volume knob? You're miked!

15 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! DING Ooh, goody! My blueberry muffins are ready! They don't make VICIOUS like they used to.

16 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! There, how do YOU like it? Don't give up the day job.

17 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

* We will return after these messages. IT'S A BLANKET! IT'S A ROBE! IT'S A GIANT HANKY! ALL IN ONE!! RED INK?! SPAGHETTI SAUCE?! TELLTALE TURNIP STAINS?! ...NO PROBLEM!! IT SLICES! IT DICES! IT CHOPS! IT CONJUGATES VERBS!! MY TEETHARE SO WHITE NOW, I BLIN

18 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sometimes it seems like there isn't enough time in the day to not do all the things that need not doing.

19 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This is certainly a pleasant... ...day.

20 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

dingle dingle dingle That sounds like the bell from the "Happy Ice Cream" truck! But where is the "Happy Ice Cream" man? Reinflating his happy tires.

21 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm not going to bark at you. What? Sob! You don't hate me anymore! I hate you. Oh, you're just saying that!

22 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

When I'm in a mood to have fun, anything can happen! Except fun.

23 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

claw claw claw GARFIELD! It's summer, you should thank me.

24 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, Liz... How about this? No WAY are you going out in public wearing that. I want a second opinion! Fine. BWA HA HA HA HA HA You guys are in cahoots! Just put it in the "ick" pile. I'll call the hazmat disposal squad.

25 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Where should we put our stuff? Anywhere is fine. How about there, close to the wa waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa They call him "Jonny Suave"

26 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Excuse me, is that your girlfriend? Yes. KICK Hi, I'm Rolf. HI, I'm get lost. And I'm with Mr. Sand Face, there.

27 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The NERVE of that big guy...kicking sand in your face! I should have punched him out! WAH-HAHAHA! ...I mean, yeah!

28 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

C'mon, Jon, stop moping about that bully. I should have defended your honor! Jon...I don't want a big, strong man... I want YOU. Really? They deserve each other.

29 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line, and...

30 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's see...next on my "To-do" list... NOOGA! NOOGA! NOOGA! Okay, that's done. I hate that list.

31 July 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Did you meet my great white guppy? We met. Nice guy. I'll be moving now...

1 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Nothing lasts forever. Oh, I wouldn't say that. Take today, for instance.

2 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

RIIIING! Meow Right here will be fine, thank you.

3 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's my birthday. If there's cake, I won't make fun of you.

4 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What can you buy a girlfriend who's angry with you? Hmm... And why am I consulting a cat? Tuna!

5 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog."... "Every time I try to throw a stick away, my dumb dog keeps bringing it back. What's up with that?" Signed, "Clueless in Seattle" Dear Clueless, the first rule of training a dog is that you must be smarter

6 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Boredom is a strange thing. It affects people's minds. Here, fishy, fishy... Making them take unnecessary risks...

7 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz and I are pretty serious, Garfield. Do you think it's time I tell her that I l...lu...luh...luh... ...loy...leee...laah...lay...loo... ...LOOOEEEEEEUUUHHHHHHFFF... ...that I like her? Go for it, whirlwind romance boy!

8 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

This place looked nicer in the brochure. Tourists.

9 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

! That was close. You can have the rest of that.

10 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Wall... Hole in the wall... MOUSE IN THE HOLE! Cheese in the mouse...mous ein the hole...hole in... clap clap stomp stomp

11 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I want that mouse caught! -and I want it caught NOW! And WHAT are you SMILING at?!

12 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

C'mon, just once! Please! No! Please?! Please?! Please?! All right! All right! Eek, a mouse. That's right! Uh-huh!

13 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Help! I'm being chased by a cet! I sold him my franchise.

14 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ugh. It's too HOT in here to nap. Z

15 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you think there's life on other planets, Garfield? Sure. There's gotta be life somewhere.

16 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ah, summer nights... The smell of the neighborhood barbecues... slap slap slap slap slap slap And the sound of Jon flailing ad mosquitos. slap slap slap slap slap I'M BEING EATEN ALIVE!! slap slap slap slap slap slap

17 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SQUIRRT! Let the catsup festival begin! I hate you.

18 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Here, Odie! Here, Garfield! HERE, GARFIELD! Try bribery!

19 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz doesn't like this tie, and she didn't say why... Women! They're enigmas, all right.

20 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Another wild weekend. I know what we can do! Let's get on an elevator, and pretend we're nauseous! Who needs to pretend?

21 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

* ** Okay, okay... * Hold a second... ** Well, THAT'S weird... * My wallet's stuck sideways in my back pock... ** I THINK THE ICE CREAM TRUCK WILL WAIT!

22 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

All done. Did you checl the chemicals? Yep. See you next week. Everyone should have a pool mouse.

23 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Yessiree... There's nothing like floating on an inner tube in the pool. -

24 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Mind sharing the pool? Not at all. You can have the deep end.

25 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Um... Aren't you supposed to be on duty? Nah. I'm on break.

26 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

lap lap lap lap lap

27 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP LAP What happened to the wading pool? Awesome work, Odie!

28 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh. Pooky, Liz is nagging me about my weight. Odie won't stop barking. Jon won't stop whining. And you... ...you always know just what to say.

29 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Letter for you, Garfield. Your subscription to "Sloth Magazine" has expired. That's just pitiful. Lick me a stamp.

30 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, you need to be more active. A fit cat is a happy cat. And a quiet vet is a likeable vet.

31 August 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And with today's thought, Odie! Yip! Concise, to the point, and stupid.

1 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Cats have strong instincts. I sense danger approaching! Diet soda? AAAGH!!

2 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Look what I got for you, Garfield... A little suit to match mine! It wasn't easy, but it did fit up his nose. NARFIELD!

3 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

That's my prom picture. I don't think my date enjoyed the meeting. She ruined her dress tunneling out of the gym. And, no doubt, broke a nail or two.

4 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Tsunami Junction It was a good idea of Jon's to come to a water park. Say, where is he, anyway? I think he went on that big slide... eeeee EEEEEEEEEEE EEEEYAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAHHHHHHH SPLASH! The "Atomic Wedgie". Can we go home now?

5 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie will now attempt to read his own mind! Nothing is correct!

6 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

How's it going? Has that guy bumped his head? More times than you'd believe...

7 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie will now translate what I say for all you dogs out there. Meow meow meow meow. Arf arf arf arf. Hold on...I didn't say ANYTHING about kissing dog's feet! *

8 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SHOVE bink Odie's lost weight.

9 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear ask a dog"... "Is there life on the moon?" In the future, please, no questions about the moon. ARRROOOO

10 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

dingle dingle dingle BLARK dingle dingle dingle

11 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hmmm. Liz, do you think I'd look good if I grew a... No. I love you just the way you are! How sweet! * KISS Sigh... How about just a little... No.

12 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I have an eye on you. Can anybody out there spare a life for this man?

13 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Well, time to go to work. HAAACK! The hairball biz is brutal.

14 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

How are you today, Odie? Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! He could have just said "yip".

15 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

In the old west, disputes were settled the old-fashioned way... Two cowboys, squared off in the middle of Main Street... In a lively game of tag! I miss the old days of television.

16 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

So, how was work today, Liz? Really! She flossed a gerbil. I hear they are good with hollandaise sauce.

17 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hallo, Liz? Whatcha doin'? I mean OTHER things than answering my nineteenth call asking you want you what you're doing. Get CALLER I.D., girl.

18 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

hmmmmmmmm hmmmmm ploop nnngh clunk Greetings! We are from the planet of tuna-flavored snacks. What have you been up to today? Oh, just saving planet earth, (burp) that's all!

19 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Look! There's Liz! And this would be Mrs. Feeny's yard. Who put this hedge in the road?!

20 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I made you sugar-free cookies... With raisins! Have you always had this dark side?

21 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm convinced Garfield is plotting against me. Does that sound paranoid? Not really. Does so.

22 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Would you like to go out for dinner, Liz? Sure! And by "out to dinner," you mean something other than... ...eating that bag of chips on the front porch, right? She must be psychic!

23 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Well, good night, Liz. Good night, Jon. I can't kiss her if you're watching, Garfield. I can stay as long as you like, Liz.

24 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz is everything I could ever want in a girl. I only hope with all my heart and soul that she feels the same way about me. You don't mind me confiding in you like this, do you? Say what?

25 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon, let's not go out tonight. Let's just talk. Talk? Sure! We talk on the phone all the time...sometimes for hours! Um...okay. Good. You start. Excuse me for a minute. * beedle beedle beedle So, how was your day? Get back inhere. You've gotta ease into

26 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

My car won't start. So I guess I'll stay home and and do nothing... What's your excuse? Like I didn't see that one coming.

27 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

AAAAROOOOOOO!! Did you hear that? Yeah. That's the call of the stupid.

28 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hail! donk You're not so tough now.

29 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

FWEEEEEET! Stop that! You can't tell me what to do. I have the whistle.

30 September 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

That's it for tonight, folks! I hope you enjoyed the show! BURN THE FENCE DOWN! Never an encore.

1 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm going to write a love letter to Liz. And great love letters always compare the loved ones to something, what could that be? Well, duh! Lasagna!

2 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF FOOF HUUUHHH FOOOOOOF Liz! I finally got the coals started! Pizza's here.

3 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What's new on the menu today, Irma? Oh, a catsup stain, a coffee ring... And I'm not sure what this is... That's quite enough, Irma. Maybe I can pick it off... scratch scratch

4 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Irma, what does this little heart mean? That means it's good for you. Then what do all these little skulls and crossbones mean? That means it's GOOD!

5 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What's the special today? You don't want to know. Gimme the special! There's a gambler in the house!

6 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Irma, there's something floating in my chicken soup. That's a chunk of chicken. With wings? chickens have wings.

7 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Fred! Hey, buddy! Good to see you! So, Fred, whatcha got for me today, pal? I've named the refrigerator.

8 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I gave Odie a balloon. Annnnnd... Yes, he still has it.

9 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, see you then! Tonight Liz and I are having a "DVD date night"! This week she picks the movie, and I make the popcorn! We'll get comfortable on the couch...pop in the DVD... Turn down the lights...snuggle up tight...and... Kissme, Lucretia!

10 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, here's where you have to slay the dragon. Theis is the part where I always get killed. snick snick snick snick snick snick How did you DO that?! I crosstrain with the channel changer.

11 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Your turn. bleep bloop You have uncovered the SWORD OF DESTRUCTION! You may now smite your enemies! You wouldn't. Where do you want it? Head? Belly? Pride?

12 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I can't believe my CAT beat me at a video game. I mean, what does that say about me? Nothing we didn't already know. Smugness does not become you.

13 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak Give me that toy! squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak

14 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Uh, Jon? Why is Garfield nuzzling my hair? Well, my guess is you used a fruit-scented shampoo this morning. Peach, to be precise.

15 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Always finish what you start. Sounds like good advice. And I don't just mean food. Now I'm confused.

16 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

EEYAAHHHHHHHH EEEK! And that concludes tonight's movie, "Monster Beneath My Bed". click Whew! Z hee hee hee

17 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Want to go running, Garfield? What on earth for?! IS SOMEONE CHASING US?! Never mind. DOES HE HAVE A SPEAR?!

18 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And so we bid farewell to an old friend... * FOR HE'S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW... ** The meat loaf is retiring. Speech! Speech!

19 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, look, Odie! A chew toy! Can you explain this? Not without laughing.

20 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

One day Mr. Hot Dog was walking down the street... When suddenly... I hate puppet shows. One day Miss Cupcake was walking down the street...

21 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz is coming over tonight. I want just the right romantic mood. Better tune up my banjo. Whoa, Jonny...back the truck up...

22 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What you're doing is wrong! Wrong, I tell you! That's what I'm going to say if you ever do something. Sounds like a plan.

23 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

TAKE THIS, YOU LOUSE! whap Weird. That's what you get for mulching his scout troop.

24 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And now back to Bachelor Horror Cinema, and "Return Of The Ex-Girlfriend". * ding-dong Don't answer it! Don't answer it! I WANT MY CHAFING DISH BACK!! YAAAHH! I miss the days of three channels.

25 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Gentlemen, if my experiment succeeds, I will rid the world of 12-foot mutant rats forever! Fascinating, professor. What is it you propose to create! Sixty-foot owls! He's gonna need a biiiiig barn.

26 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

We're LOST in these woods, Manfred! Noe, now, Babs...calm yourself. There's no need to worry...see? We'll just ask that forest ranger in the hockey mask for directions! Worry, Babs.

27 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What are you eating NOW? Garlic. You never told me you were part vampire.

28 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I rented a scary movie to watch tonight...come on! All right! You know, I can see it just fine from here. How about you? Absolutely.

29 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And now back to "Obsessive-Compulsive Chiller Theater". BUMP Oops. Sorry about your knick-knack shelf, there. YAAAHH The horror.

30 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

-

31 October 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

-

1 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dogs are stinky". And for an opposing viewpoint, here's Odie. Just as soon as he's done rolling in whatever it is over there.

2 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What'cha doing, Jon? I'm tryiong to read! Any luck? Go away! If you insist.

3 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I carry a picture of Liz wherever I go. How sweet. Insane, but sweet.

4 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The Cat Network presents... "The World's Greatest Hairballs"! What are you watching? Nothing I can't top.

5 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

BOOT Uh...nope. CRASH! Someday we'll achieve orbit.

6 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

WHACK! WHACK! It just wouldn't be autumn without our little traditions... WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK

7 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

And now tonight's feature... "Earth Versus The Spider" Don't you guys have this on DVD?

8 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, cat, are you ugly for a reason, or were you born that way?! SMACK! You momma's so fat... Give it a rest, Larry.

9 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SMACK! Ha! Missed me! Then how come you're all flat? Uh, Gravity is getting stronger?

10 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

If you squish me, I shall become famous! They will hold an annual day of remembrance in my honor, you fat slob! Does anyone here know WHY we celebrate "National Stupid Day"?

11 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You squash me, and I'll tell my cousin, "Fang"! GEEEEEEE, I'm scared. FANG! hop hop Okay, maybe a touch scared.

12 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

It's spider-stomping time! It is? STOMP! My watch must be slow.

13 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SCHLAP! ICK! Never jump into a pile of wet leaves. YAAAHH!

14 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm not myself until my first cup of coffee. SLUP Better.

15 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Z I am SO going to get blamed for this.

16 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Someday I will be a tall tree. Someday I will climb you. Somebody just chop me down now!

17 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello? Do I own a cat? No. Nobody "owns" a cat.

18 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

shuffle shuffle shuffle shuffle shuffle shuffle shuffle Could you be more annoying? Scratcha the backa?

19 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I wonder if Odie is up to no good. Dogs are so hard to read.

20 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Oh, wow! Really? So what are you making, mom? Uh huh...turkey...stuffing...mashed potatoes...gravy... Green bean casserole...corn on the cob...potato salad...corn bread... Cranberry sauce...scalloped potatoes...butter rolls...bakedham...potato dumplings..

21 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Kids, remember, crime does not pay! Although it can be pretty tasty.

22 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What are you up to, Garfield? Huh? Who, me? Nothing! You could've let me know she was standing there.

23 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie will now reveal the secret to a happy life. You may prefer to remain unhappy.

24 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

The cooking gods are angry with me again. And for your penance, thou shalt order pizza.

25 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm going out with Liz. And I'll be staying home with the ham. What's that in the back seat, Jon? Tomorrow night's dinner.

26 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, this menu is in French! You're holding it upside down. Oh, yeah! Can I still order the beef stew? If you like.

27 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

No...what? You did what? ...ALL of it?! Wow, Liz...that's AMAZING! Good for you! Okay...bye. AAARRRRGGHH! She's finished her Christmas shopping already! You contain your glee well.

28 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Boy, the mall was brutal today. It was so packed, the food court ran out of food. Just like the time you were there. I remember that day fondly.

29 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Look, Mrs. Feeny is making a snowman! No...it's just a giant snowball. Wait...is that a catapult? I'll be in the bomb shelter.

30 November 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sant knows when you've been bad. Maybe I could cop a plea bargain.

1 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, don't you think you're overdoing the "good boy" routine for Santa? ...Garfield? Your slippers, sir? You're freaking me out.

2 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I got a Christmas card, Garfield. I bet it's from my mother. How do you know that? It's addressed to "Sissy Boy". Maybe it's from your health club.

3 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Ow. Impressive. I think I strained my spinner.

4 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

A little to the right... A little to the left... A little more to the left... Okay, now a bit to the right... And jussssst a touch back to the left...little more... Annnnt...THERE! Stop! Perfect! Help. See you in january.

5 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't eat those Christmas cookies! They're for company. Should I go out and knock first?

6 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You ate all the Christmas cookies! So did I! So, what are you going to do about it? I'm telling Santa. WAIT! I'M SORRY! I'LL MAKE SOME MORE! I'LL LEARN TO BAKE!

7 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

You'd better shape up, buddy boy... Yeah, yeah... Or I'm calling Santa! No, you won't. I cut the phone lines.

8 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Rudolph, won't you guide my sleigh tonight? Get with it, chubs. Use this. Cool! A GPS! I feel old.

9 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Merry Christmas, Jon! I'm giving you the "Box of Mystery"! It's empty. And now you've ruined it!

10 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I look good in red.

11 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

All right, Garfield! That's it! I'm calling Santa! bip bip beep boop bip beep And I'm telling him what you did! You have reached the north pole "naughty line". We are currently experiencing a high volume of calls... Please stay onthe line, and y

12 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

...every Christmas, dad would go out and chop down a tree for us... Not again. Then one year the bark beetles comae. Make it stop. Tinsel on an elk rack just ain't the same. MAybe I should hit him with a yule log.

13 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you been working on your Christmas list? Done, and done. I already e-mailed it to Santa. He got through the firewall again, sir. Man, that cat can hack.

14 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

HO! HO! H THONK! "The cristmas they left the flue shut" will return. Little help here! I think they're running out of plots.

15 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

What would you like for Christmas, Liz? Oh, I don't know... Surprise me! I'm doomed. No surprise THERE.

16 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Maybe a dress for Liz...but I don't know her size. Think I should ask her? Oh, look. Walnut cheese balls. Smart boy.

17 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

SMOOCH Gotcha.

18 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Weeks Ago: Ah! bip bip boop beep boop boop bip I'd like to order a present for my boyfriend... It's the one on page 32... my credit card number is... There! That was easy. Now: Think she'd like a pressure gauge? We're BACHELORS,baby.

19 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Think Liz would like a fish finder for Christmas? Well, excuse me for not thinking like a girl! Funny...you run like one.

20 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

I STILL don't know what to get Liz. I think I'll consult with an expert... ...And she's about this tall. SECURITY!

21 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz, I'm really stuck on your Christmas present. You've got to give me a hint! I like pink. Does that help? She likes pink.That narrows it to the grapefruit family...

22 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Maybe Liz would like some perfume. "Eau de Wowie-Wow-Wow" Sounds potent. "May cause excessive drooling in men."

23 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

"Mucho macho musk ox mist for men". "Guaranteed to drive women insane". spritz spritz Kiss me, or I'll punch your lights out! By golly it works!

24 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Merry Christmas, Liz. Oh, Jon! A music box! It plays the "Be My Lederhosen Baby" polka! Uh...wow. See? The little ballerina has an accordion! I have a friend who can bury that for you.

25 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh The day after Christmas is always so quiet and peaceful... And the excitement has died down... All the presents have been unwrapped... All the carols have been sung... All the cookies have been scarfed... WAAAAAAAHHHH

26 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

So what does an elf like you do with the rest of your year? I spend it working on my game. And that would be? Miniature golf. Bah-da bum.

27 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz is gonna LOVE my new sweater! tug tug pull pull How do I look? Electrifying.

28 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

New hats! Saaame weirdo.

29 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Just look at me. What do I have to show for myself? Me!

30 December 2010
 
 
   
Garfield

Look, Garfield! Mr. Barrow has his gorilla suit on! Now he's climbing up the side of his house. Here comes the banana dance. I'll watch just this once.

31 December 2010
 




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