Sant knows when you've been bad. Maybe I could cop a plea bargain.
1 December 2010
Garfield, don't you think you're overdoing the "good boy" routine for Santa? ...Garfield? Your slippers, sir? You're freaking me out.
2 December 2010
I got a Christmas card, Garfield. I bet it's from my mother. How do you know that? It's addressed to "Sissy Boy". Maybe it's from your health club.
3 December 2010
Ow. Impressive. I think I strained my spinner.
4 December 2010
A little to the right... A little to the left... A little more to the left... Okay, now a bit to the right... And jussssst a touch back to the left...little more... Annnnt...THERE! Stop! Perfect! Help. See you in january.
5 December 2010
Don't eat those Christmas cookies! They're for company. Should I go out and knock first?
6 December 2010
You ate all the Christmas cookies! So did I! So, what are you going to do about it? I'm telling Santa. WAIT! I'M SORRY! I'LL MAKE SOME MORE! I'LL LEARN TO BAKE!
7 December 2010
You'd better shape up, buddy boy... Yeah, yeah... Or I'm calling Santa! No, you won't. I cut the phone lines.
8 December 2010
Rudolph, won't you guide my sleigh tonight? Get with it, chubs. Use this. Cool! A GPS! I feel old.
9 December 2010
Merry Christmas, Jon! I'm giving you the "Box of Mystery"! It's empty. And now you've ruined it!
10 December 2010
I look good in red.
11 December 2010
12 December 2010
...every Christmas, dad would go out and chop down a tree for us... Not again. Then one year the bark beetles comae. Make it stop. Tinsel on an elk rack just ain't the same. MAybe I should hit him with a yule log.
13 December 2010
Have you been working on your Christmas list? Done, and done. I already e-mailed it to Santa. He got through the firewall again, sir. Man, that cat can hack.
14 December 2010
HO! HO! H THONK! "The cristmas they left the flue shut" will return. Little help here! I think they're running out of plots.
15 December 2010
What would you like for Christmas, Liz? Oh, I don't know... Surprise me! I'm doomed. No surprise THERE.
16 December 2010
Maybe a dress for Liz...but I don't know her size. Think I should ask her? Oh, look. Walnut cheese balls. Smart boy.
17 December 2010
18 December 2010
Weeks Ago: Ah! bip bip boop beep boop boop bip I'd like to order a present for my boyfriend... It's the one on page 32... my credit card number is... There! That was easy. Now: Think she'd like a pressure gauge? We're BACHELORS,baby.
19 December 2010
Think Liz would like a fish finder for Christmas? Well, excuse me for not thinking like a girl! Funny...you run like one.
20 December 2010
I STILL don't know what to get Liz. I think I'll consult with an expert... ...And she's about this tall. SECURITY!
21 December 2010
Liz, I'm really stuck on your Christmas present. You've got to give me a hint! I like pink. Does that help? She likes pink.That narrows it to the grapefruit family...
22 December 2010
Maybe Liz would like some perfume. "Eau de Wowie-Wow-Wow" Sounds potent. "May cause excessive drooling in men."
23 December 2010
"Mucho macho musk ox mist for men". "Guaranteed to drive women insane". spritz spritz Kiss me, or I'll punch your lights out! By golly it works!
24 December 2010
Merry Christmas, Liz. Oh, Jon! A music box! It plays the "Be My Lederhosen Baby" polka! Uh...wow. See? The little ballerina has an accordion! I have a friend who can bury that for you.
25 December 2010
Sigh The day after Christmas is always so quiet and peaceful... And the excitement has died down... All the presents have been unwrapped... All the carols have been sung... All the cookies have been scarfed... WAAAAAAAHHHH
26 December 2010
So what does an elf like you do with the rest of your year? I spend it working on my game. And that would be? Miniature golf. Bah-da bum.
27 December 2010
Liz is gonna LOVE my new sweater! tug tug pull pull How do I look? Electrifying.
28 December 2010
New hats! Saaame weirdo.
29 December 2010
Just look at me. What do I have to show for myself? Me!
30 December 2010
Look, Garfield! Mr. Barrow has his gorilla suit on! Now he's climbing up the side of his house. Here comes the banana dance. I'll watch just this once.
31 December 2010