This way, guys! Z - Hi! Who are you? - We're twelve little donuts who've lost our way... - Could you direct us back to the land of yummy pastries? Why don't I just eat you instead? - You try it, buster, and I'll call our big brother! Go
- Ahem... - That's MY chair. Que? - GET UP RIGHT NOW! No hablo English, Senor Seatless. - All right, if you won't let me have the chair... - The LEAST you could do is SHARE it with me. Oh, very well... - You're blocking the set.
Garfield, Liz may be that special "one". - Sure, she may tell lame jokes and her nostrils twitch when she's angry, but she may still be the "one". - The "one" is right behind you, big mouth, and her nostrils are twitching.
Huh. - Liz says I don't share my feelings. - She says that's important in a relationship. - Perhaps I am being a callous pig. - Maybe I should try harder at this. - - I love you, man. Bring back the pig,...man.
Welcome to "How to Train Your Cat". - Let's start with th basics, shall we? C'mon over here, Muffin. - Muffin...c'mon, kitty. Heeere, kitty, kitty...heer-no, Muffin, this way...this way... Someone's being trained alright, and it ain't
Hmmm... - I'm reading an article about cats and the stress they can cause. - snatch - RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP - What article? - What stress? - A soothing sense of calm just came over my being.
And now "The Feline Gourmet" with your host, chef Snuggles. - Hi, and welcome! Today, my owner is out for the afternoon... - So we'll be whipping up a hardy guppy goulash! That's one nervous-looking fish.
Jon, we're going to be late! I'm ready! - You are NOT going out in those pants. - No, no parachute pants, either. - I don't think so. - Uhhhh...no. - Over my dead body. - Where does he GET these clothes? There was a sale at Clown Town.
A lady at the restaurant tonight told Liz and me we "make a lovely couple"! - Buuuut?... - But then I stepped on her foot, she screamed, and her dentures shot out and lodged in the busboy's neck. There's always a "but".
GAAAAHHH! - Oh, no! I've burned the toast! You FOOL! How COULD you?! - And the light bulb in the refrigerator burned out!! We're all DOOMED! - And I can't find the TV remote!!! It's the end of the world as we know it!! - THERE'S A DRINK ON
The Hungry Heifer - My fork is dirty... - These rolls are as hard as rocks...my steak is overcooked... - I see LIPSTICK on my glass...and there's an earring in my mashed potatoes! - Where's our waiter?! ...WAITER! - How's your meal?
Hmmm... - I saw Jon hide a box of cat treats in this cabinet. - What a pack rat! How much stuff is down here? - He should know better thsn to hide anything from me. - I'm a cat...supreme cunning and unparalleled resolve, and... - Wait... -
Say... - Jon, why don't we just stay in tonight and talk? Talk? - Yeah...just sit on the couch and talk. Talk? - You know...I say something, then you say something. Talk? - It's good for couples to talk. Talk? - C'mon...it'll be fun. Talk? -
- Jon, are you done with the hose yet? Just a minute. - I'm trying to flush this- - GOPHER!!! - ...UP MY PANT LEG!!! GOPHER UP MY PANT LEG!! - YAAAA-AHHH!! And there he goes, headed for downtown. - We're going to be on the news again, aren't
- What a nice day at the beach, Garfield. - Even Jon is enjoying himself. - Poor guy...he's usually a walking disaster area. - Where is he with those hot dogs, anyway? - SEAGULLS! - I'm not gonna look. Good thinking.
- Jon's Blob: Today I cleaned my barbecue grill! - There was a lot of caked-on gunk, and it took a lot of hard scraping with a wire brush! - All afternoon long, it was scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape,
Hey, that's great! - OK, see you in a few! - Liz is bringing over dinner tonight! - ...and she made LAGASNA! - Yep...she should be coming through that door any minute now! - ** DING DONG It's open! - Jon? Jon who?
Z - Sigh... - I'm bored. - I know! Let's walk down the street and have a parade! - I'll be the grand marshal, and you can be a float! - People will line the street, cheering and throwing flowers! - SMACK! - I'm bored again. Welcome back.
YAAAARRRGHHH! - Okay, the monster has eaten Fred, Charlene, and Wilberforce. - If we're going to make it out of here alive... - One of us is going to have to distract it! - Can I get a volunteer?... - Anyone?... - How about you, Lumpy? Oh,
click - ...GIVE MY CREATURE *LIFE*!!! - ZZZZZIT! ZZZZZOT! - LIFE, I SAY...*LIFE*!!! - ZZZZZZIT! ZZZZZZOT! ZZZZZZAT! - ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!! I'LL GET UP ALREADY!!! - STOP WITH THE JOY BUZZER, MOM!!! Lazy teenage monsters.
bip boop boop beep bip - What do you feel like for dinner tonight, Liz? - How about Italian? - No? Chinese, then? - How does pizza sound? - Or we could just do big greasy burgers. - Oh, and we may have to bring the cat. "May"? There is no
- Garfield, the stomach garage called, you're due for a 10,000-meal tune-up. - The boy scouts called...they want to help your stomach cross the street. - The hospital called...they want to donate your stomach to a blue whale. - The
To: sclaus@nor - Dear Santa, I have been a very good cat all year long. - You can't fool Santa, you know. - He knows if you've been good OR bad. - And he's watching you all the time. - - Although perhaps you've seen my evil twin.