Hello? - No, sir, I do not have an unusually large head. - Is that you, Doc Boy?! His brother gets bored.
1 April 2011
Danger is my life! - Ha-HAAA! - You shouldn't eat ice cream so fast. Ask me if I care.
2 April 2011
- Get back! Go away, you stupid mutt! - - - boop beep beep boop beep boop boop - * beedle beedle beedle beedle - SLURP!
3 April 2011
Let's see...did I remember to shed today? - - Check.
4 April 2011
There's cat hair everywhere! Don't be jumping to conclusions there, pal. - Yelp! - Odie sheds, too.
5 April 2011
- Uh-oh. - You forgot to keep moving while you were shedding, didn't you? Help me!
6 April 2011
I'm sweating like a pig. - - Ah! Much better! I envy you.
7 April 2011
This Property Valiantly Protected by a Savage, Bloodthirsty, White-Hot Ball of Canine Fury. - - Who writes your stuff? Wouldn't you like to know...
8 April 2011
Geez... Will eat homework for food. - How low will dogs sink? - To here, I guess. Iced Toilet Water 5c
9 April 2011
Hmmm... - I'm reading an article about cats and the stress they can cause. - snatch - RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP RIP - What article? - What stress? - A soothing sense of calm just came over my being.
10 April 2011
- - Up, please.
11 April 2011
YAWN - You look tired. - It's comforting to know I've got the right look.
12 April 2011
They say love is blind. - - Love is also an idiot.
13 April 2011
The sun. The wind. - The rain. - Have you been outside lately? Fascinating theories...
14 April 2011
And now "The Feline Gourmet" with your host, chef Snuggles. - Hi, and welcome! Today, my owner is out for the afternoon... - So we'll be whipping up a hardy guppy goulash! That's one nervous-looking fish.
15 April 2011
Scrapbooking, stamp collecting, needle-point... - I try to avoid hobbies. - It's sort of a hobby of mine.
16 April 2011
Jon, we're going to be late! I'm ready! - You are NOT going out in those pants. - No, no parachute pants, either. - I don't think so. - Uhhhh...no. - Over my dead body. - Where does he GET these clothes? There was a sale at Clown Town.
17 April 2011
Thank you! Thank you for your applause! CLAP CLAP CLAP - I was swatting a bug. - Thank you for swatting a bug!
18 April 2011
Welcome to the show! - - This is where you applaud. Oh, we thought this is where you entertain!
19 April 2011
I need a volunteer from the audience! - - Heck, I need an audience.
20 April 2011
You've been a great audience! No, we haven't. - Have so. Have not. - Then we'll just agree to disagree. Okay.
21 April 2011
I am at peace with the world. - YAWM - Or sleepy. They're a lot alike.
22 April 2011
I'm feeling down. - Then put a smile on that face, Mr. Mopey Pants! - Do you know there's a sock on the roof? I believe I do.
23 April 2011
- SPLOP! - SOOOO-EEEY! PIG-PIG-PIG-PIG! - - GLOMP! - - MMMMFFFFF!!
24 April 2011
- - How was the kite flying? The kite had a better time than I did.
25 April 2011
They say there are some big fish in this lake. - - How big?!
26 April 2011
Oh, no! We're going to crash! - NO TIME TO REACT! LOOK OUT! AYIEEE! - I'd call a turtle ambulance, but that could take weeks. Ow.
27 April 2011
Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! zzzzzzzzzzzzz - Ulp - That fly died a hero.
28 April 2011
A lady at the restaurant tonight told Liz and me we "make a lovely couple"! - Buuuut?... - But then I stepped on her foot, she screamed, and her dentures shot out and lodged in the busboy's neck. There's always a "but".
29 April 2011
Hello, Bark-Bark! Hi, Moo-Moo! - I sang a song today, Bark-Bark! - Was it a happy song, Moo-Moo? I wonder if sock puppets are flammable?
30 April 2011