Do you believe in ghosts? WHERE?! I mean, no. No, I don't. Ask him about his 23 nightlights.
1 November 2013
The moon is full and hair is growing on my body! Hair in my ears! Up my nose! What's happening to me?! "Curse of the middle-aged man"...
2 November 2013
3 November 2013
It's cold, windy and raining outside. Outside is stupid.
4 November 2013
Modern technology is a wondrous thing. I've forgotten how to turn the computer on! But it will never replace good old-fashoined dumb.
5 November 2013
!FRA -!FRA !FRA !FRA !FRA !FRA !FRA !FRA !FRA Odie, stop barking at the mirror.
6 November 2013
The mice wanted to go camping. AIEEE!! I said they could stay in Jon's slippers.
7 November 2013
Let's go do something, tonight. Okay. You'll have to stare off into space yourself. I'll manage.
8 November 2013
You miss a lot of things. A lot of things miss me.
9 November 2013
pssssht! gluck gluck gluck gluck gluck gluck gluck gluck BURRRRRRP GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK GLUCK BURRRRAAAAAP Not everything is a contest, you know! . Said theloser.
10 November 2013
Garfield, let's make the most of this day. Let's live it to the fullest. Let's open the curtains! Jon! There's sunshine out there!
11 November 2013
I'll have a Happy Burger. And the fat lady in the fur coat? DONK
12 November 2013
HUNGRY CAT! Oh, man, am I glad that he's... THIRSTY DOG!
13 November 2013
Garfield, we're in a rut. We need to spice things up. I'm changing our name to Roscoe! Claw time.
14 November 2013
Some men look good in hats. I wonder what she meant by that. Some men would know.
15 November 2013
Garfield, let's see if we can communicate. Concentrate and focus! I'm sensing relaxation... Z
16 November 2013
*** *** * You have three new messages. First message: squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak I am ALWAYS losing that thing! GARFIELD! Found it.
17 November 2013
Pets are supposed to amuse, Garfield. That's an ugly rumor. You do not amuse. You'd better start. You want amusement? Get a monkey.
18 November 2013
Have you ever taken a good, hard look at yourself? I said... Hang on.
19 November 2013
Hi, I'm a plump little chipmunk! Would you like to play? I like to roll in mustard! Is this a sting operation?
20 November 2013
Here's a good saying, Garfield. "Failure is not an optin". True that. Around here it's a way of life.
21 November 2013
Liz, why do you love me? I have my reasons. My ninja skills? WHAT ELSE COULD IT BE?!
22 November 2013
Jon's depressed. He feels alone and scorned... Nobody will jam with me. AND for good reason.
23 November 2013
growlll I'm hungry. Are you hungry? Me? Hungry? Wow, that's a toughie... Yessiree, that's a real stumper, that is. Gosh, let me think... Thank you, Captain Sarcasm.
24 November 2013
Good morning, Mr. Grumpy. Nothing you can do can spoil my good mood today. * DING! Is that the toaster? Your slippers are done.
25 November 2013
Yes, I have a cat. Yes, he's big and orange. Yes ,he's wearing a necklace made out of canary feathers! In some cultures this signifies a rite of passage.
26 November 2013
I'm back from the store, Garfield. Let's see...I got milk...eggs...bread... And a ninja outfit! And people wonder why the economy is bad.
27 November 2013
I remember family holidays. Uncle Joe would do his magic act. He made the fruitcake disappear. No great loss there.
28 November 2013
Jon, why are you staring at me? I can't take my eyes of you, Liz. Could you at least blink? That's the way I stare at strawberry shortcake.
29 November 2013
Garfield, you look depresse. Pondering a life unfulfilled? Yes. I've never eaten a pelican.
30 November 2013