There are jungle cats and house cats. - One thing separates the two. - Scented kitty litter. Jungle cats are barbarians.
1 July 2013
Cats love milk, Garfield. We do? - Lap it up! Any cereal to go with this? - You're not lapping. Or some sugar, corn starch, cocoa powder, salt, and egg yolks and we can make chocolate pudding.
2 July 2013
I don't feel like cooking, Garfield. - I'll just open a can or something. - "Critter parts". Any port in a storm.
3 July 2013
Big date with Liz tonight. - I'm wearing my special tie. - Pull this and it explodes! Allow me.
4 July 2013
Every morning I wake up and think... - "Today is a new and exciting day!" - Than I see you. They don't call me "Mr. Reality" for nothing, pal.
5 July 2013
MINE! Poor Jon... - I GOT IT! I GOT IT! Will he ever learn? - YEEOOWW! "Catch the pineapple".
6 July 2013
SMACK! - SMACK! - WHACK! - WHOP! - SWAT! - SPLAT! - Six flies, three spiders, one gnat, two grasshoppers, four moths and an earwig! - Burgers are done! Oh, no thanks!
7 July 2013
Sometimes things just don't get right for me. - There's a word for that... - "Life".
8 July 2013
That's new. - There was a sign here last week... - "Beware of falling rocks".
9 July 2013
Garfield, I am calling you... - I am the lasagna. - NOT! Meat loaf is cruel.
10 July 2013
I have deep thoughts, Garfield. - I should write them down. - Where are my crayons? Next to your army guys.
11 July 2013
Garfield hid my car keys. - But, HA! I found them! - Uh, Garfield? Where is the car? The game is afoot!
12 July 2013
If you wait patiently... - - Complete boredom will arrive.
13 July 2013
- Come on...come on... - I'll be late for my date with Liz! - HONK! HONK! HONK! - THANKS FOR DRIVING SO LOW, YOU MOUTH-BREATHING, KNUCKLE-DRAGGING, PEA-BRAINED IDIOT! YOU... - ...ooo - You say this is the lates fashion trend? It's called
14 July 2013
- Gah. Urf. - And so the day begins.
15 July 2013
I've fallen in the old well! - If only there were a CAT who could save me! - Timmy must have landed on his head.
16 July 2013
Jon says he has a major announcement. - Like I care... - I've gone electric! Okay, I care a little.
17 July 2013
Help! Help! I'm stuck in a tree! - Help! Help! I'm going to fall! - I like to warm up before I get started.
18 July 2013
Garfield likes it when you come over, Liz. - How can you tell? - He's awake. Yeah, we should erect a statue in her honor.
19 July 2013
- - Why is everything wrinkled? It's called "The Odie Effect".
20 July 2013
Sigh... - I remember our family trips. - There's cousin Earl. - He was accidentally left at a rest stop. - He was missing for years. - As it turned out, he was adopted by a pack of wolves. - We got a postcard. "I have acquired a taste for
21 July 2013
Garfield, I found Pooky! - Whoa! What's happening?! - Those latent urges die hard.
22 July 2013
My invention will benefit the world... - Lifting the yoke of oppression from pet owners everywhere! - The portable litter box! Vengeance will be mine.
23 July 2013
ODIE! Her, Odie! Her, boy! ODIE! - WHY IS He IGNORING ME?! -
24 July 2013
Can this day get any better? - Ants have eaten all of your tofu. - Well, yes it can!
25 July 2013
Liz and I have become very close. - We share our deepest secrets. - Should I tell her about my limited fashoin sense? I think she knows.
26 July 2013
- YOU PUT MY GOLDFISH IN MY SHOE! - It's his birthday.
27 July 2013
Huh... - This article says that you can learn a lot from your cat. - You should try it. - - GULP! CHOMP! SNARF! - BURRRP - Z I have taught him well.
28 July 2013
A kid stopped me today. - He asked if I was old. - I tied his shoelaces together. You have some good years left, my friend.
29 July 2013
beep - I just got a text! - "I have an itch". My right ear.
30 July 2013
Cats know things. - For instance, I can tell that Odie's been digging. - It's like I'm psychic!
31 July 2013