There are jungle cats and house cats. One thing separates the two. Scented kitty litter. Jungle cats are barbarians.
1 July 2013
Cats love milk, Garfield. We do? Lap it up! Any cereal to go with this? You're not lapping. Or some sugar, corn starch, cocoa powder, salt, and egg yolks and we can make chocolate pudding.
2 July 2013
I don't feel like cooking, Garfield. I'll just open a can or something. "Critter parts". Any port in a storm.
3 July 2013
Big date with Liz tonight. I'm wearing my special tie. Pull this and it explodes! Allow me.
4 July 2013
Every morning I wake up and think... "Today is a new and exciting day!" Than I see you. They don't call me "Mr. Reality" for nothing, pal.
5 July 2013
MINE! Poor Jon... I GOT IT! I GOT IT! Will he ever learn? YEEOOWW! "Catch the pineapple".
6 July 2013
SMACK! SMACK! WHACK! WHOP! SWAT! SPLAT! Six flies, three spiders, one gnat, two grasshoppers, four moths and an earwig! Burgers are done! Oh, no thanks!
7 July 2013
Sometimes things just don't get right for me. There's a word for that... "Life".
8 July 2013
That's new. There was a sign here last week... "Beware of falling rocks".
9 July 2013
Garfield, I am calling you... I am the lasagna. NOT! Meat loaf is cruel.
10 July 2013
I have deep thoughts, Garfield. I should write them down. Where are my crayons? Next to your army guys.
11 July 2013
Garfield hid my car keys. But, HA! I found them! Uh, Garfield? Where is the car? The game is afoot!
12 July 2013
If you wait patiently... Complete boredom will arrive.
13 July 2013
Come on...come on... I'll be late for my date with Liz! HONK! HONK! HONK! THANKS FOR DRIVING SO LOW, YOU MOUTH-BREATHING, KNUCKLE-DRAGGING, PEA-BRAINED IDIOT! YOU... ...ooo You say this is the lates fashion trend? It's called"Knuckle-Dragger Chic&qu
14 July 2013
Gah. Urf. And so the day begins.
15 July 2013
I've fallen in the old well! If only there were a CAT who could save me! Timmy must have landed on his head.
16 July 2013
Jon says he has a major announcement. Like I care... I've gone electric! Okay, I care a little.
17 July 2013
Help! Help! I'm stuck in a tree! Help! Help! I'm going to fall! I like to warm up before I get started.
18 July 2013
Garfield likes it when you come over, Liz. How can you tell? He's awake. Yeah, we should erect a statue in her honor.
19 July 2013
Why is everything wrinkled? It's called "The Odie Effect".
20 July 2013
Sigh... I remember our family trips. There's cousin Earl. He was accidentally left at a rest stop. He was missing for years. As it turned out, he was adopted by a pack of wolves. We got a postcard. "I have acquired a taste forsmall game."
21 July 2013
Garfield, I found Pooky! Whoa! What's happening?! Those latent urges die hard.
22 July 2013
My invention will benefit the world... Lifting the yoke of oppression from pet owners everywhere! The portable litter box! Vengeance will be mine.
23 July 2013
ODIE! Her, Odie! Her, boy! ODIE! WHY IS He IGNORING ME?! -
24 July 2013
Can this day get any better? Ants have eaten all of your tofu. Well, yes it can!
25 July 2013
Liz and I have become very close. We share our deepest secrets. Should I tell her about my limited fashoin sense? I think she knows.
26 July 2013
YOU PUT MY GOLDFISH IN MY SHOE! It's his birthday.
27 July 2013
Huh... This article says that you can learn a lot from your cat. You should try it. GULP! CHOMP! SNARF! BURRRP Z I have taught him well.
28 July 2013
A kid stopped me today. He asked if I was old. I tied his shoelaces together. You have some good years left, my friend.
29 July 2013
beep I just got a text! "I have an itch". My right ear.
30 July 2013
Cats know things. For instance, I can tell that Odie's been digging. It's like I'm psychic!
31 July 2013