You are not a dweeb. - You are not a miserable failure. - You are not ugly. Self-esteem ringtones.
1 February 2014
OWWOOOOOO clap clap clap clap clap clap - OWOOOOOOOO clap clap clap clap clap clap - OOOWOOOOOOOOO clap clap clap clap clap - OOOOOOWOOOOOOOO clap clap clap clap - YOWR ROWR ROWR - - How was karaoke night? Tough room.
2 February 2014
Well, hello Mr. Personality! - Let the good times roll! Woo hoo! - You sure do light up a room! And I'm not even trying.
3 February 2014
Cats are mysterious... - Really mysterious... - What are you up to? Even I don't know.
4 February 2014
BARK! Too lound. - bark Too soft. - Are you ever happy? Too whiny.
5 February 2014
COUGH! GASP! - WHEEZE! HACK! - Okay, come in! Enough with the fresh air.
6 February 2014
I need only two things, Liz. - The love of a good woman... - And a meticulous sock drawer. Do you know him? No.
7 February 2014
That was my pet mule. - She had three legs, a glass eye, and one tooth. - I miss you, Aphrodite! I must have the movie rights.
8 February 2014
brown gravy. - Wow, I'm better than I thought! You had me at "gravy".
9 February 2014
I'm in a bad mood. - And there's only one thing to do when that happens. - Pass it on. Uh-oh.
10 February 2014
- Whoa! Apple pie! - I must check behind my back more often!
11 February 2014
Jon's contemplating his life. - The joys, the sorrows... - I'll never play the bagpipes. The roads not taken...
12 February 2014
Sigh. - - I take it Garfield isn't coming. "meow".
13 February 2014
A penny for your thoughts, Jon. - Are nose hairs connected to the brain? - A dollar if you never ask it again. Thank you.
14 February 2014
Garfield, I was wondering... - They say cats are clean animals... - What happened to you? I'm a rebel.
15 February 2014
Siiigh - Well, there's a blizzard outside... Don't say it. - We're snowe din... Don't say it. - The cable TV has gone out... Don't say it. - And we're out of hot chocolate. Don't say it. - What ELSE can go wrong? - You said it.
16 February 2014
It's time to put an end to... - - It's time to start something.
17 February 2014
I found my toolbox, Garfield! - A man without tools is no man at all! - Now, how does this open? Turn in your man card.
18 February 2014
I have tools, Garfield! - Men and tools built skyscrapers, you know... - Like with this thingy. Put it back before you hurt somebody.
19 February 2014
Oh, that's just great! - The mice are using the cat for a bed! - Should I make little blankets?! There is a chill. Ignore him.
20 February 2014
Jon's dealing with the mouse problem in a very unique way. - He's trying to adapt. - Today is the worst day of my life. Say cheese.
21 February 2014
GULP! - Poor thing, your dish is empty. - Timing is everything.
22 February 2014
- Let's make snow angels, Garfield! - C'mon! It'll be fun! - All you have to do is fall backward into the snow... - And then flap your arms to make the angel wings! - Watch me! - Coming up next, a local man is gored by his own lawn gnome.
23 February 2014
Here's what you are, Garfield. - "Sedentary". - It means you collect dust. Use it in a sentence.
24 February 2014
Okay, everybody, break it up! - Oh. It's just you, Garfield. - I am NOT fat!
25 February 2014
WAH-HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! - snatch! - hee hee hee hee New driver's license photo.
26 February 2014
Sports have always been a big part of my life. - - Being bad at them, I mean. Ah.
27 February 2014
Garfield! - That popcorn was for everyone. - And "everyone" is my middle name, baby!
28 February 2014