Would you still love me if I turned into a werewolf? I guess... Depends on how much you shed. Welcome to my world.
1 September 2017
Cookie! The service here is lousy.
2 September 2017
Charcoal. Charcoal. Lighter fluid. Lighter fluid. Match. Match. SSSHICK! FOOOMF Eyebrows. The grocery store was fresh out.
3 September 2017
I know what we can do! If I wanted to do something, I wouldn't be hanging around with YOU.
4 September 2017
dooG !gninevE !retaehT drawkcaB ot emoclew dnA kcilc
5 September 2017
What is that mouse doing? He's running away from me. I'll chase him later.
6 September 2017
I've lost all but two pieces of this jigsaw puzzle. I don't know if I can put them together. Start with the edge.
7 September 2017
Nowhere to go. Nothing to do. Let's go somewhere and do something! Boy, we are on different planets.
8 September 2017
...what do you think of that? Wha...? Tuna! That's my fallback answer for when I haven't been paying attention.
9 September 2017
HI, THERE! POO! Oh! Did I startle you? You really jumped. That was pretty funny. Sort of.
10 September 2017
Let's do nothing today. Well, okay... As long as it doesn't interfere with my plans to goof off.
11 September 2017
I heard a funny joke today. But I don't remember the punch line. Oh, well, "knock knock" Don't.
12 September 2017
Paradise < No way. I'm pretty sure that paradise would be downhill.
13 September 2017
A fish walks into a diner and the waitress says, "What will you have?" And the fish says, "WATER"! Oh, how sad! Go away! Hello? Eddie?... A fish walks into a diner...
14 September 2017
Life is easier when you have someone to shar eit with. Especially if that someone is a good listener.
15 September 2017
oday is the day everything is going to go right! My cup is filled with bacon grease instead of coffee. Maybe tomorrow.
16 September 2017
Summer's not over until the last wet dog has shaken. GAAAHHH
17 September 2017
There is so much going on in the world. It's hard to keep up. Nonsense. Just do what I do. Ignore it.
18 September 2017
We cats are at one with...oh, what's the word? Let me look it up on my phone, here... Nature!
19 September 2017
There are no fish here, cat! No? Nope. Moo! Where have you been? Having a hamburger.
20 September 2017
I * SQUIRRELS Lost a bet.
21 September 2017
I'm going to practicew visiting with Liz. We should shre our feelings. Notice how I didn't giggle when I said that? I'm impressed.
22 September 2017
Okay, relax, Garfield. SNORE Rats, now I have to start over.
23 September 2017
Hi, hon. We have a new cook. He just graduated from a culinary school. Oh? Which school? The Insitute of Advanced Bachelor Cusine. Wow. What will you have? Two soups, please. Yum.
24 September 2017
Here you go, Garfield. Tuna-flavored cat food! When did they stop making actual tuna?
25 September 2017
Oh, no! I dropped my phone into the lake! That explains the mean tweet from the carp.
26 September 2017
Some dogs chew slippers... And others partake.
27 September 2017
There's nothing on woth watching. click click click click click click click click So I'll watch faster. click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click
28 September 2017
Good night, Liz * SMOOCH Boy, that was a great kiss. Why didn't YOU ever kiss me like that, Garfield? Hey! I'm eating here!
29 September 2017
You know what was the greatest invention of all time? Cheese! The wheel. What kind of cheese?
30 September 2017