Would you still love me if I turned into a werewolf? - I guess... - Depends on how much you shed. Welcome to my world.
1 September 2017
Cookie! - - The service here is lousy.
2 September 2017
- Charcoal. Charcoal. - Lighter fluid. Lighter fluid. - Match. Match. - SSSHICK! - FOOOMF - Eyebrows. The grocery store was fresh out.
3 September 2017
- I know what we can do! - If I wanted to do something, I wouldn't be hanging around with YOU.
4 September 2017
dooG !gninevE - !retaehT drawkcaB ot emoclew dnA - kcilc
5 September 2017
- - What is that mouse doing? He's running away from me. I'll chase him later.
6 September 2017
I've lost all but two pieces of this jigsaw puzzle. - - I don't know if I can put them together. Start with the edge.
7 September 2017
Nowhere to go. - Nothing to do. - Let's go somewhere and do something! Boy, we are on different planets.
8 September 2017
...what do you think of that? Wha...? - Tuna! - That's my fallback answer for when I haven't been paying attention.
9 September 2017
- - HI, THERE! POO! - Oh! Did I startle you? - You really jumped. - That was pretty funny. - Sort of.
10 September 2017
Let's do nothing today. - Well, okay... - As long as it doesn't interfere with my plans to goof off.
11 September 2017
I heard a funny joke today. - But I don't remember the punch line. - Oh, well, "knock knock" Don't.
12 September 2017
- Paradise <--- No way. - I'm pretty sure that paradise would be downhill.
13 September 2017
A fish walks into a diner and the waitress says, "What will you have?" - And the fish says, "WATER"! Oh, how sad! Go away! - Hello? Eddie?... A fish walks into a diner...
14 September 2017
Life is easier when you have someone to shar eit with. - - Especially if that someone is a good listener.
15 September 2017
oday is the day everything is going to go right! - - My cup is filled with bacon grease instead of coffee. Maybe tomorrow.
16 September 2017
- - - - - - Summer's not over until the last wet dog has shaken. GAAAHHH
17 September 2017
There is so much going on in the world. - It's hard to keep up. Nonsense. Just do what I do. - Ignore it.
18 September 2017
We cats are at one with...oh, what's the word? - Let me look it up on my phone, here... - Nature!
19 September 2017
There are no fish here, cat! No? - Nope. Moo! - Where have you been? Having a hamburger.
20 September 2017
- I * SQUIRRELS - Lost a bet.
21 September 2017
I'm going to practicew visiting with Liz. - We should shre our feelings. - Notice how I didn't giggle when I said that? I'm impressed.
22 September 2017
Okay, relax, Garfield. - SNORE - Rats, now I have to start over.
23 September 2017
Hi, hon. - We have a new cook. - He just graduated from a culinary school. Oh? - Which school? - The Insitute of Advanced Bachelor Cusine. Wow. - What will you have? Two soups, please. - Yum.
24 September 2017
Here you go, Garfield. Tuna-flavored cat food! - - When did they stop making actual tuna?
25 September 2017
Oh, no! - I dropped my phone into the lake! - That explains the mean tweet from the carp.
26 September 2017
Some dogs chew slippers... - - And others partake.
27 September 2017
There's nothing on woth watching. click click click - click click click click click - So I'll watch faster. click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click
28 September 2017
Good night, Liz * SMOOCH - Boy, that was a great kiss. - Why didn't YOU ever kiss me like that, Garfield? Hey! I'm eating here!
29 September 2017
You know what was the greatest invention of all time? - Cheese! - The wheel. What kind of cheese?
30 September 2017