1978 1979 1980 1981 1982 1983 1984 1985 1986 1987 1988 1989 1990 1991 1992 1993 1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017 2018
 
 


 
   
Garfield

Boy, that was some party last night. I noticed.

1 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Why so tired? I built a snowman today. -

2 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog"... "Do dogs really eat homework?" munch munch munch

3 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Today is the birthday of Marvin J. Fuddlestone. Who? He revolutionized sock-drawer organization. How dull. He was burried in a giant anklet. How disturbing.

4 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Three...two... one... Friday face!

5 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I just scored concert tickets! Two seats, front row, center! "Accordion Fest: Night of a thousand Polkas"! Um... I'll distract him. You run.

6 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

NO CATA ALLOWED NONE THIS MEANS YOU! HEY! OKAY, OKAY JUST ONE

7 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm thinking about exercising. Thinking about it...thinking about it... OKay, I'm done. Now I'm thinking about pudding.

8 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

The world is my playground. Sigh... And the big kids are hogging the swings.

9 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! Good times! I must be missing something.

10 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hot dogs! Ice cream! What to do? What's that? A new taste sensation!

11 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

WHY IS THERE A MOUSE IN THIS HOUSE?!! whisper whisper whisper For the free Wi-Fi.

12 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I forgot Liz's birthday! Not to worry, Jon. Where are you going? To notify your next of kin.

13 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

-> < -> < -> < Fun with rule followers.

14 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Are you going to sleep all day? All in favor? Z

15 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield... I know it's cold out today, but... What if someone else wants hot chocolate? Then they should be me.

16 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

17 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

This will be our first anniversary without my husband, Walter. It must be hard for you. I'm so sorry, Agnes. Thanks, Helen. What happened to Walter, anyway? I ate him.

18 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's go shoe shopping! Or... Shoe shopping it is! Wise choice.

19 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

GOOD HEALTH > < DONUTS -

20 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

21 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Today's the day! No more mister nice guy! SLUP MWAHAHAHAHAHA! Switching to dark roast. How evil.

22 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

When I go out, do you feel sad? Oh, yeah! I put on a sad face, and do a sad dance... I'm thinking "no". ...and the sad party I throw.

23 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

ECHO POINT I can't think of anything to say. Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Okay! MEOW!

24 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sending a text to Liz... "How do I love thee? Let me text the ways". tap tap Oops! I sent that to Mrs. Feeny by mistake. Poor Jon. ping! Mrs. Feeny is wondering what I'm doing saturday night. Poor Mrs. Feeny.

25 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Is that a TIE you're wearing, Garfield? Yes, it is. I found it in a trendy little dumpster down the street. Niiice!

26 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Here's the plan, Odie. I'll hit Jon with this snowball, and you close the window before he can throw one back. Ready? Take that, Jon! SPLOT! A little quick on the draw there, Ace.

27 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

No, I don't want to play fetch No, I don't need a hug. No, I don't know the dog secret handshake. And no, you can bury that yourself. See you later, Odie. Some friends wear me out.

28 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm out of control! What crazy thing will I do next?! Z

29 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

A tree just fell on my car! What should I do?! Jon! Jon! Here's what you do... WALK to the store to buy my food.

30 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog, what can I do to make my dog's breath more pleasant?" Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark. Buy mint-flavored slippers.

31 January 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you tried doing sit-ups?

1 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you think of me often, Garfield? Oh, sure! Assuming that thinking of you thinking of me counts?

2 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I don't have a problem in the world! My arm is stuck! That's one.

3 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

. Sorry I'm late. You're not late. I'm not? Nope, right on time. Are you sure? Absolutely. Well, darn. I had a really good excuse. Go ahead. There was this fire-breathing dogcatcher... Get to the "really good" part.

4 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

24 hors in a day. Or, as I like to think of it... 5 meals, 4 naps, 11 snacks and a couple of TV shows.

5 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I call it "Evolution of Snowman".

6 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear ask a dog, I'm angry with my mailman. What should I do?" arf arf arf Bite him. But first... arf arf arf Make sure that you've had all your shots.

7 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

They say that doing housework is great exercise. Jon! What a great idea! I'll clean out the refrigerator!

8 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

What did you guys have for lunch today? Pizza. Ooo! Do you have any left? Leftover pizza?... In THIS house?! Yeah, there's some in the kitchen, next to the unicorn.

9 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I see by my watch... That it's time to... wonder why I'm wearing a watch.

10 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

type send * ping * send * ping * send * ping

11 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Woo-hoo! It's the weekend! Friday is a state of mind.

12 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

13 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you think I shed too much? Arlene, if anything, you don't shed enough. * Cat sweet talk.

14 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BUTCHER SHOP I see you have made some new friends.

15 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Got a weather alert. There's a big storm coming. * ping! ping! Who cares? Lots of businesses closing early. Whatever. The pizza parlor... WE'RE DOOMED!

16 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sometimes I have no idea what I'm doing. Whoa I always know what I'm doing. He's lucky.

17 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Z YAWN errrrggghhhh hurrrrrrrrrrrgggggggh yeeeeuuuuugggghhhh Aren't you getting up? I was going to, but the stretching wore me out.

18 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm awake. It's about time. No parade?

19 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I like to live in the moment. As long as the moment includes pizza.

20 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BOOT! Thank you for flying Garfield Airlines!

21 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

In school ,I had a big crush on this girl... Betty-Jo Bobby-Sue Mary-Jane Anna-Lee Beck-Lou Wandy-June Ed. She was named after her six aunts and one uncle. One weird family.

22 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

...and that's what I'd like to do this weekend. Z Z HEY! Of course you're not fat!

23 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

GUESS WHAT JUST HAPPENED?! I DECIDED TO LEAVE THE ROOM?!

24 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* boop PIZZA Garfield? BURP

25 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sometimes I just can't sleep. Z This isn't one of those times.

26 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

All right, Garfield! You catch those mice! Sure... Right after my manicure.

27 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BEWARE OF DOG A STINKY WET DOG Okay,I'm out.

28 February 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you know that dogs are related to wolves? Very, very embarrassed wolves.

1 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'd like to order a pizza. Certainly, sir...what size? Give me the Garfield. Wow! The Garfield?! Yes, I know that pizza can feed twenty people. Or one Garfield!

2 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"! OW! TOE CRAMP! TOE CRAMP! He's such an inspiration.

3 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

HA! IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?! Never call march's bluff.

4 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Pooky, should we exercise, or just sit here? Have it your way.

5 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

That cloud looks like a cow. Moo! Windy today. You don't know the half of it.

6 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

bat bat It's not as easy as it looks.

7 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I make the world a cooler place. But even I can do only so much.

8 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Would you like to hold paws? Is there food in your paw? No. Well? I'm trying to follow your logic.

9 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

plink OW! Look! You're shedding too!

10 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Come on, Odie. Show me what you've got. It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for.

11 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Just look at you... Garfield, will you ever stop being lazy? I could stop, but I'm no quitter, pal.

12 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Here you go, Garfield. Still warm from the dryer.Let's see what nature's up to. Out of order.

13 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I am so tired. Sorry, Odie. I don't have the energy to kick you today. We all have our disappointments.

14 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I've been giving the future a lot of thought. And, well... I don't see anything. What a waste of your past.

15 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Arlene, your eyes are like limpid pools of water. How sweet! With goldfish swimmming around in them... Uh... Tender, succulent goldfish. Okay, now you're creeping me out.

16 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's time for Garfield's Helpful Household Hints. Got a squeaky hinge on a door? Feed your cat lasagna!

17 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh What is it, Garfield? Thought I saw a bud on the rose.

18 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

HOOP! HOOP! Jon is preparing for his annual "Dance to Spring". GUH! And no, he's not stretching. This thing gets tighter every year. I think you need to let out your stem.

19 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

How, exactly, do bees make honey? MAKE honey? I've been buying it at the store. Idiot.

20 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! BARK! BARK! Sorry I'm late. Shall I start over? Just give me a summary. Bark.

21 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Z The Roman Empire rose and fell again. Long nap...

22 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm finally getting my man cave! It's about time. I asked Liz to help me decorate. Uh-oh. I'm thinking a scrapbooking table over here... Goodbye man cave, hello craft room.

23 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield! What do you think of the raisins I added to the mashed potatoes? -

24 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

zzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz Who are you? The first housefly of spring! Aren't you going to welcome me? SWAT I was hoping for something a little more FESTIVE! SWAT Huzzah I hate you!

25 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Today's word is "somnolence". Allow me to use it in a sentence. Z

26 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* ping! * ping! * ping! Why is a mouse texting you sad-faced emojis? We're out of cheese.

27 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog, what's with you dogs rooting through the garbage all the time?" Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Your denial would be more believable if you didn't have a banana peel on your head.

28 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

The cheese for lunch was chewy... And then I realized that I'd left the plastic wrap on it! Funny, huh? I was going to say "sad".

29 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Are you still angy? Yes. How about now?... YES! ...now? YES!!! I'll be standing in a safe distance away.

30 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Times change. True. I used to be awesome... Now I'm REALLY awesome!

31 March 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

ALBUN What happened there? We don't discuss that one.

1 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

My horoscope is intriguing. It say I'll meet someone strange today. You are definitely strange. We're out of carrot cake.

2 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Look at this. A thank you note from the guy who owns the Pizza Parlor. Sent from his villa in the south of France! The villa that Garfield built.

3 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hreard the news? What news? According to science, dogs are smarter than cats! Says the guy who drinks from the toilet.

4 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Cats are fast. Faster than the eye can see.

5 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do I look cool, Liz? I'm over here. Who said that? The person who doesn't think ypu look cool.

6 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

This has been a long day. I've been awake for minutes... And it seems like hours!

7 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

POUND! POUND! POUND! POUND! I told you not to eat that so fast! But it's so GOOD!

8 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Salad's ready! Garfield? SALAD'S READY! I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with that information.

9 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Pooky, I understand that Jon put you in the washing machne again. What was that like? He doesn't like to talk about it.

10 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Purr Are you thinking about me? Not at all. No? I was thinking about sausage craps in a dumpster behind a butcher shop. Purr!

11 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I hope you liked your dinner. Not bad. BURP BURP I give it two burps.

12 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you like my new shoes? Ummmm... Lie and say yes. Well... Lie and sy yes. They're kinda... You're supposed to lie and say yes. Play by the rules, dummy!

13 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

We should clean the house. SMACK! Why did you do that?! Just changing the channel.

14 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh... Jon, aren't those coals ready yet? Not yet. I don't know why they won't light. The bag says they're "self-starting". I know where he hides the donuts.

15 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I sneezed today. Wow. How DO you find the time?!

16 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm under a lot of pressure. BUURRRRRP... Now, not so much.

17 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's scurry around on the floor. Nah...cats don't scurry. Cats stroll.

18 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Guys do not like sharing their feelings. No, we do not. Sharing my feelings makes meanxious... Caaaareful.

19 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

What a cutie-pie! Hey! Do you like him better than you like me? Right this second?

20 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

urp sniff sniff SCHWAK I really gotta lay off the garlic bread.

21 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

22 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Time out! Ahhhhh... Isn't that pleasant?

23 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

ROCK AND ROLL!!! I always wanted to yell that. It's over, right?

24 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Cats are better than dogs. And less moist.

25 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

WILD BEAR! YAAAAAH!!! He gets a kick out of that.

26 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Liz! Jon! Liz! Come on, you owe me one. Jonnnnn...

27 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I heard a sad story today. Was it about a cat who wanted to have his ears scratched? Was it about a hungry cat? It had nothing to do with you. That IS sad.

28 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Wow This really takes me back. I haven't watched this movie since I was a kid. I wonder why... YAAAHH! Now I remember. The flying monkeys are gone now, Jon.

29 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You and I are a team, Garfield. And *I* am the coach. Good. Then YOU can be fired.

30 April 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I love gardening. I just planted vegetables. All our canned goods are missing! Darn. Let's have meat.

1 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You know what's fun? Well, do you know? Huh? Huh? Okay. I'll bite. What's fun? Barking at cats. I'll have to try that sometime.

2 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I haven't seen a mouse all week. Good job, Garfield! How was the vacation? Great! But it's always good to get back home.

3 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Arlene... Here's a picture of me to keep near your heart. If it were any bigger, it would be near everybody's heart. What a lovely thought!

4 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Laziness is contagious. Right, Jim? Jim?...

5 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Liz! Liz! Liz! Liz! Liz! Liz! Liz! What IS it, Jon? Watch this! BWOINNNG DONK OW! Men. Do it again!

6 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

This is interesting... They say the key to longevity is trying new things. I agree... Assuming that ice cream flavors count.

7 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Somebody gave Odie a teddy bear. Sorry you had to see that.

8 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

If I'm in here any longer... I'm going to get all pruny. Ha! Ha! Get it? Yeah, I know. Fish joke.

9 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Not everyone is impressed by you. Well then, not everyone is paying attention.

10 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RUNKITTA RATS! Did you get your mower started?

11 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Times change. Why, I can remember a time... When I didn't think about times changing.

12 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

13 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Check the headlines... Finish my coffee... Okay, back to work.

14 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Here comes Jon. Try to look busy. Do you have an appointment?

15 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I like to be treated like a queen. A queen? Seriously? I know where there's a fish. Your majesty!

16 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You should eat more vegetables. What? More than I'm eating now? ... More than none whatsoever?

17 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield, what say we go on a diet together? Sure! I'll make sure you only eat what you're supposed to! Of course! I'll watch you every waking minute! And I'll sneak food while you're sleeping!

18 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

19 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

WHO PICKED OUT MY BACON BITS?!

20 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I don't care about anything. Me neither. It's part of my "tough guy" persona. Same here. * DING My cupcakes are ready! Dibs!

21 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm not going to swat you. You're not? On one condition. Sure! What is it? Stop being creepy. Swat me.

22 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh Time for a vacation. Right, Odie? -

23 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

** Meow, meow, meow, meow No, I don't want to buy a rubber mouse. Telemarketer.

24 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

They say love makes toe world go 'round. So without it, the world would stop and we would fly off and be killed?! Not literally. Whew! Don't bother trying to explain things to him.

25 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I got a paper cut froma book. Which then dropped on my foot. That's why I'm limping! I love books with happy endings.

26 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

27 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you ever accomplished anything wortwhile? Hang on... Check it out.

28 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

GARFIELD! NERMAL! click

29 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

There's something I've been meaning to say. What's that? BARK! BARK! BARK! I walked right into that one.

30 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Are you going to stare at your phone through our entire date? Yes, I am. Cool.

31 May 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hey, Garfield! Guess what today is. National Donut Day! I thought that was every day.

1 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Is there anything better than fine dining... And facinating conversation? Huh? Is there? How should I know?

2 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

** Jon, the commercial is over! The movie is back on! WHAT?! WHAT?! WHAT?!! WHAT?!! WHAT?!!! Are you guys sure you're not married already?

3 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

How do I do it, you ask? I'll tell you how I do it. I don't.

4 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's see...we should do something cultural... But also fun. Oooh, HERE'S a place... The Ice Cream Museum! I've never climbed a 40-foot fudge pop!

5 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's hard to keep up with all the technology. Let me help you out, Jon. This...is a pencil.

6 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm thinking of moving the TV. What?! Maybe across the room. Let's see... That should shorten my commute from the kitchen by about six steps. Approved!

7 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

GAAAHHH! YAH! YAH! YAH! How was the Thai restaurant? GAH! GAH!

8 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Does my breath smell like cheese? Yes, it does. Cool! That's what the ladies like. Good luck.

9 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* Yoooooo-hoooooo You haven't weighed yourself in a while. Why should I? All you do is insult me! Oh, I do not! Oh, yes you do! Every time I step on you, you make fun of my weight! Prove it! Fine! Wow. Wow what? You're a SUCKER,too, fat boy.

10 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* Oh, Garfield ** That can't be anything good.

11 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Another birthday is out to get me.

12 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

The older I get, the smarter I get. Why don't they make cars out of cardboard? Or the dumber others get.

13 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't you just love the friend who never stops reminding you that they're younger than you?

14 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I found your old scrapbook, Garfield. Look... Your first hairball! You sentimental weirdo, you.

15 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Hello, cat. I'll be this evening's 40th-birthday age nightmare. I don't see any age nightmare. Look closer.

16 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

So you're turning 40 this week, huh? Yup. Wow...that's OLD. It is not! Look at me...I'm still young and youthful in everything I say and do! Yeah, yeah. Geez...kids these days. -

17 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Okay, so I'm turning 40. I suppose I should look on the bright side... Only ten more years until I get the senior citizen's discount at Donut Barn!

18 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you... * Happy birthay, you're FOR-TY...happy birthday to0000 yoooou! And ma-ny mooooore. *

19 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Wow...40 years old! The things you must have seen! Do you remember disco?! Of course. In this house, it never died.

20 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

So, you're now 40. Yes, I am. You look good... Aging well is the best revenge.

21 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BURP! Why do I even look at you? Because you know how to have fun.

22 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

...and then the chipmunk ate my shoes... WHILE I WAS STILL WEARING THEM! I see by your expression that you've been visiting with Jon.

23 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

24 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I like this sying by Benjamin Franklin. "Early to bed and early to rise... makes a man healty, wealthy and wise". And lonely, dateless and boring.

25 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm trying to make the world a bteer place in which to live. Then make me a sandwich!

26 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Dogs are like an open book. With a few pages missing.

27 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's okay, Garfield... I sewed the stuffing back into your bear. Cool-looking scar there, pookman.

28 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Alrene's angry with me... But she won't tell me why. And for that, I thank her.

29 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sometimes it seems like the world has gone mad. And it's only a tiny bit my fault.

30 June 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Ummm...Liz? Yes? Do you think I'm a good kisser? The truth? Well, yeah... I think you're a GREAT kisser! SMOOOCH Guess what Liz said? There's going to be NO living with him.

1 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

They say life is like a highway. Yes, that is true. And the mondays are the potholes.

2 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

tappity tappity tappity tappity tappity tappity tappity tappity This is my "Jon burned dinner so we're ordering pizza" dance! tappity tappity tappity

3 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Is it possible Odie isn't as dumb as he looks? Nope.

4 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I tell Pooky all my secrets. A teddy bear can't be compelled to testify against his owner.

5 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

The humidity makes my hair a little frizzy. What do you do for it? Inquiring minds want to know.

6 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm sad... Cookie! It comes and goes.

7 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Surrender, puny earthling! You are no match for our superior... Who schedules your invasions? Oh, shut up.

8 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

What's wrong with the world, you ask? I'll TELL you what's wrong with the world. It doesn't do enough for me.

9 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Garfield, did you eat the peanuts? Maybe. You could have at least taken them out of their shells. Who has time for details?

10 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog,"... "What exactly is a beef by-product?" And the world may never know.

11 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I wish I had a super power. Yeah, right. What super power would YOU have? Like the ability to make everything taste like ice cream! My hero!

12 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

We should do something. Let's go to a movie. Really? You'd take me to a movie? Sure. People drop a lot of candy and popcorn.

13 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon got me a smaller food dish... So I'll eat less. Good plan.

14 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Whiiiiiine No, you can't come in! Now leave me alone! * PADDA PADDA PADDA PADDA PADDA PADDA PADDA PADDA BOINNG! -

15 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Is it legal for cats to marry? Garfield? Are you okay? I can't feel my brain!

16 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm tired. And it#s no wonder... Last night I didn't get enough too much sleep.

17 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

ECHO POINT BARK! That's because nothing you say is worth repeating.

18 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm smart. Did that sound convincing? Your shoes are on the wrong feet.

19 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's go dancing! You mean where people can SEE us?! What would make Liz so shy? I don't know this man.

20 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's never too late... to give up.

21 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

22 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Cat Ballet.

23 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

* Meeeoooooooowwww... * Boobopdadeebopadoo * Cat jazz.

24 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Whine... What's the big deal? Rowrrr Unfriended by a squirrel.

25 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

OW! Paper cut! Get it? Don't quit the day job.

26 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I was talking to Liz... She says that we need to start eating healthier. And you know what that means. Right. Start stockpiling donuts.

27 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

The world will long remember me! They'll say "What a great cat, that...uh..." "...Garfield!"

28 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Wha?!... Hello, I'm a frozen caveman from the last ice age. And now I'm all thawed out! So this is the modern world, huh? This is it. What's that? Modern man. Well, back to the glacier. Have a nice nap.

29 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm warming up...I'm warming up... ONE!! I'm cooling down...I'm cooling down...

30 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You should examine your life. Okay. Hmmm... I'm great! Dig a little deeper.

31 July 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you heard that dogs are man's best friend? Uh-huh. My owner is a moron. Small world.

1 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Here the lion attacks his prey. Just like me! Although I would have used some steak sauce.

2 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Sigh That was my sign of happiness! I wanted to make sure she didn't confuse it with some other sigh. Sigh.

3 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You have behaved yourself all day. The day is not over.

4 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff If you grill it, they will come.

5 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Don't you have anything better to do? I am pleased to inform you that we do not.

6 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

tic tic tic tic YES! You CAN bake apie inside a cake!

7 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Missed. It's Odie's birthday.

8 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I am King of the House! You can be prince.

9 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I broke a lamp today. I broke two saucers AND a vase! Awesome! We take a lot of pride in being cats.

10 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do I enjoy engaging conversation, you ask? Do my elbows match? We may never know.

11 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Z GARFIELD! GARFIED! GARFIELD! COME QUICK! HURRY!! HURRY!! *I* happen to think rainbows are SPECIAL! So are my naps.

12 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm bored. Let's do something fun! Sorry. I'm committed to boredom.

13 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

An exercise tip from Garfield the Cat... Before doing strenuous exercise, you must spend an appropriate amount of time stretching. I recommend eight to twelve hours.

14 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'n on vacation. So I'm only being half as cute as usual. Still too much.

15 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I may look like a frog, but I', really an enchanted prince. He probably wants a kiss from the princess. You can break the spell by giving me your credit card number. Didn't see that coming.

16 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Everyone should be nice to animals. So true. Unless they taste good. Truer yet!

17 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Cat hair coming through! That had better not have been that spider. hee hee hee

18 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

19 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I've eaten so much I can't move! Not that I wanted to.

20 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I won! I won!! I'm so excited! A two-week vacation at the beach! Not the brightest snowman.

21 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Ha! You and that teddy bear! I wish *I* had a teddy bear. Ha!

22 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's the invasion of the Ravenous Beetles! But there's just one of you. What?! Come on, guys! You said you'd back me up! But we just ate. URP You go ahead.

23 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I'm here to bring joy into your life. Leaving already? I'm saving a little joy for myself.

24 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I bit my tongue today. Oh? Not on purpose, right? Riiiight? He wondered what it would taste like.

25 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Why so glum, Garfield? Look on the bright side... You have so much to be happy about! PLenty of food... Okay, that's about it. That's not a bad list.

26 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Let's start the week with an inspirational thought. DIE, MONDAY, DIE!!!

27 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I always try my best. That'll never work. You should try somebody else's best.

28 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Have you lost weight? You must be working out. You look so young! Beware of Insincere Dog Yeah, yeah, yeah...

29 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You're not half as great as you think you are. Whoa... That's still pretty good.

30 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.. Pepperoni...sausage and onion...extra cheese... Another pizza poem?

31 August 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Thanks for watching. Why is he wearing pajamas? Good night. Z Ah.

1 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

2 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Time to celebrate! It's... National Scyscraper Day! Woo-hoo! Let's eat!

3 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Welcome to "Garfield's Really Excellent Bedtime Stories". "Once upon a time..." Z

4 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Odie has dug a hole. It's a really good one, too. Right, Jon? A little help...

5 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Do you think everything has a purpose? Absolutely! Mine is to keep the donut population under control.

6 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

It's friday! Let the fun begin! Who wants to hear a polka?! Let the fun end!

7 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"To lose weight, you need to burn calories." "Walking a mile burns 100 calories. Swimming burns 500 calories an hour." Lying there burns zero calories! How many calories can I burn by smacking you with a diet book?

8 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You don't waste a single ray, do you, Garfield?

9 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

This takes a lot of effort. Well, not a LOT of effort. Just enough.

10 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon's yard work skills are iffy. RUNAWAY LAWN MOWER! Albeit entertaining.

11 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

"Dear Ask A Dog, how many different kinds of dogs are there?" bark bark Two. Good dogs and bad dogs.

12 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You shouldn't eat in bed. I wonder why not. Oh. Possibly because of the crumbs.

13 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You look really nice, Liz. Jon must really be in trouble. Is that a new hairstyle? Oh, BIG trouble. And have you lost weight? Leaving-the-country-and-changing-his-identity-trouble.

14 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

If a cat lives in your house, you are very lucky. Even if you may not realize it.

15 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Jon? Hi, Liz. Jon, you look TERRIBLE! I know. I haven't been able to take a bath for three days. Why? Are you sick? No. Is it a plumbing problem?...did you forget to pay your water bill? Well, WHY, then?! Found it.

16 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

You are watching the Drying Paint Network. Okay, let's give it a touch... Stillll a little wet. Oh, come ON!

17 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

I like lasagna. Which has cheese in it. OOOOOO!

18 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! Not yet! Got a new sound effects guy. Ah.

19 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

OW! I spilled coffee on my lap! Sugar?

20 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

Suerly there's something better to do than staring off into space. Oh, there is! Z Z

21 September 2018
 
 
   
Garfield

(null)

22 September 2018
 




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