Do you know that dogs are related to wolves? - - Very, very embarrassed wolves.
1 March 2018
I'd like to order a pizza. Certainly, sir...what size? - Give me the Garfield. Wow! The Garfield?! - Yes, I know that pizza can feed twenty people. Or one Garfield!
2 March 2018
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"! - OW! - TOE CRAMP! TOE CRAMP! He's such an inspiration.
3 March 2018
- - - - HA! IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?! - - Never call march's bluff.
4 March 2018
Pooky, should we exercise, or just sit here? - - Have it your way.
5 March 2018
That cloud looks like a cow. - Moo! - Windy today. You don't know the half of it.
6 March 2018
bat - bat - It's not as easy as it looks.
7 March 2018
I make the world a cooler place. - - But even I can do only so much.
8 March 2018
Would you like to hold paws? Is there food in your paw? - No. - Well? I'm trying to follow your logic.
9 March 2018
- plink OW! - Look! You're shedding too!
10 March 2018
- - - - Come on, Odie. Show me what you've got. - It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for.
11 March 2018
Just look at you... - Garfield, will you ever stop being lazy? - I could stop, but I'm no quitter, pal.
12 March 2018
Let's see what nature's up to. - - Out of order.
13 March 2018
I am so tired. - Sorry, Odie. I don't have the energy to kick you today. - We all have our disappointments.
14 March 2018
I've been giving the future a lot of thought. - And, well... - I don't see anything. What a waste of your past.
15 March 2018
Arlene, your eyes are like limpid pools of water. How sweet! - With goldfish swimmming around in them... Uh... - Tender, succulent goldfish. Okay, now you're creeping me out.
16 March 2018
It's time for Garfield's Helpful Household Hints. - Got a squeaky hinge on a door? - Feed your cat lasagna!
17 March 2018
- - - - - Sigh - What is it, Garfield? Thought I saw a bud on the rose.
18 March 2018
HOOP! HOOP! Jon is preparing for his annual "Dance to Spring". - GUH! And no, he's not stretching. - This thing gets tighter every year. - I think you need to let out your stem.
19 March 2018
How, exactly, do bees make honey? - MAKE honey? - I've been buying it at the store. Idiot.
20 March 2018
BARK! BARK! BARK! - Sorry I'm late. Shall I start over? - Just give me a summary. Bark.
21 March 2018
Z - The Roman Empire rose and fell again. - Long nap...
22 March 2018
I'm finally getting my man cave! It's about time. - I asked Liz to help me decorate. Uh-oh. - I'm thinking a scrapbooking table over here... Goodbye man cave, hello craft room.
23 March 2018
Hey, Garfield! - What do you think of the raisins I added to the mashed potatoes? -
24 March 2018
zzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz - Who are you? The first housefly of spring! - Aren't you going to welcome me? - SWAT - I was hoping for something a little more FESTIVE! - SWAT - Huzzah I hate you!
25 March 2018
Today's word is "somnolence". - Allow me to use it in a sentence. - Z
26 March 2018
* ping! - * ping! * ping! - Why is a mouse texting you sad-faced emojis? We're out of cheese.
27 March 2018
"Dear Ask A Dog, what's with you dogs rooting through the garbage all the time?" - Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! - Your denial would be more believable if you didn't have a banana peel on your head.
28 March 2018
The cheese for lunch was chewy... - And then I realized that I'd left the plastic wrap on it! - Funny, huh? I was going to say "sad".
29 March 2018
Are you still angy? Yes. - How about now?... YES! - ...now? YES!!! I'll be standing in a safe distance away.
30 March 2018
Times change. True. - I used to be awesome... - Now I'm REALLY awesome!
31 March 2018