Sometimes I'm asleep... - And sometimes I'm awake... - WISHING I was asleep.
1 July 2019
Garfield, you need to do something. - We have a big mice problem. Really? - According to the mice, we have a big Jon problem.
2 July 2019
What's new, Odie? Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! - Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! - Can't you just say "Oh, nothing much" like everybody else? Bark!
3 July 2019
Hungry, Garfield? - - What's that got to do with anything?
4 July 2019
Listen, Arlene! * - They're playing our song! ** * ** ** * - That's an ice cream truck. I'm getting all misty here.
5 July 2019
The world is coming to an end! - - And, once again, the world is saved by a cup of coffee.
6 July 2019
- - - - - - Yeah, I still got it. *
7 July 2019
"What's the use?" - - I like to start my day with a demotivational thought.
8 July 2019
I'm not calling a plumber this time, Garfield. drip drip drip drip Ho boy... - All you need is the right tool. drip drip drip drip - With the right too, Jon can break anything.
9 July 2019
Look at that. - Odie is digging a hole. - That can't be good for the rug.
10 July 2019
This movie looks interesting. - But it has subtitles. Boooring. - It's about dog-eating komodo dragons. I'll pop the popcorn.
11 July 2019
Garfield, I've decided to grow a beard! - It'll make me more manly. boop bip boop - Hi, Liz...uh, honey, I have this idea... Ask nicely, Mr. Manly.
12 July 2019
Hey, Garfield, the delivery guy just told me this is the fifteen-thousandth pizza we've ordered! - Hmmmm - By golly, he's right.
13 July 2019
- Get in, Garfield! Jon, Jon, Jon... - One does not simply "get in" a kiddie pool... - - - - One must make a splash!
14 July 2019
Remember, people... - Laughter is the best medicine. - Unless you have stitches.
15 July 2019
- - We're awfully good at this.
16 July 2019
"Dear Ask a Dog, what qualifies you to guard a house?" - BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! - It seems unlikely that it would be your big muscles.
17 July 2019
It's too bad that cute isn't contagious. - Why would you say tha... - HEY!
18 July 2019
This is a donut. - Stop eating donuts. - This is a carrot.
19 July 2019
Where have you been? Fishing. - Fishing? Yup. - Got a can opener?
20 July 2019
HUP! - Umff...ummmmfff...errrrgggh... - roll roll roll - roll roll roll - THUD - I hope you appreciate this. - It takes me all DAY to clean that waffle iron! Where's my bucket of freshly churned sweet creamery butter and my barrel ofvanilla
21 July 2019
I * - I * - I * --->
22 July 2019
Ah, Mary Beth Skeevers. - She really liked me. - She had an unusual skin condition. Those earrings really bring out her scales.
23 July 2019
Odie's very smart. - His brain is in perfect shape. - Becaus eit's never been used.
24 July 2019
I'm thinking about getting a new car. - - An ice cream truck? Check out the giant fudge pop on the roof!
25 July 2019
Would you be surprised to learn I was a superhero? - Very, very, very, very, very, very surprised. - that's a lot of verys! Not nearly enough.
26 July 2019
I enjoy the classics. - Ah, yes... - A 1940 first edition "All-Butter Cookbook".
27 July 2019
riiiiing riiiiing - Are you ready for our big date tonight, Jon? Sort of. - What do you mean? I'm still wokring on my hair. - What's wrong with your hair? It won't lay down. - Why no? Well, Garfield's been practicing all day. - Practicing
28 July 2019
I'm planning my menu for the week. - Let's see, what do I want to eat? How abouuuut... - EVERYTHING!
29 July 2019
Have you ever been in a storm where it's blowing so hard the rain comes sideways? - GISSSSHHHH - Can't say as I have.
30 July 2019
- - Yup. I'm the good-looking one.
31 July 2019